Acidwire and NeoIfrit
by riverdaleswhiteflash
Summary: Remember when Inoue Sora became a hollow in episode two? Well, what if the hollows who did it, hadn't been able to finish the job?
1. It begins

Disclaimer: This should be fairly obvious, but I don't own Bleach, or any of it's characters.

Or the fairly large you'll-see-what that I'm planning to surprise you with a few paragraphs down.

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Inoue Sora stood in the sky, looking down at someone who could not see him.

Sucks to be him, huh?

He reflected on all of the problems he had had. Being dead, being invisible to his sister, being chased by masked creatures with holes in their chests who had said he had some sort of energy that they wanted to eat, the list goes on. Shouldn't there be a dead person military to deal with problems like this?

He looked down on his sister, the beautiful, innocent young lady who still could not see him.

That's when he felt the tell-tale feeling of nausea.

_Them __again?_ He thought _Oh no._

They quickly had him down. He had escaped before, he wouldn't this time.

They took him into... someplace barren. Someplace... dead. A hollow planet, devoid of anything with a heart.

"You're ours now," one of them said, pressing his face (and breath) close to Sora's.

"What are you going to do next?!" Sora was hysterical.

"I'm pretty sure one of our brothers has told you by now, as tasty as you seem to be."

Sora felt two or three bites before sinking to the depths of his own mind...

And waking up in a volcano's crater, lying on his stomach witha nightmarishly large, four-legged djinn of fire nose-to-fire-breathing-snout with him.

He jumped back, screaming. The djinn seemed unshaken.

_"Really, _Sora. Is this how you react to looking at yourself?"

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU?!"

"Friendlier than the things that just caught you, though judging from your reaction I doubt you'll believe me on that note." The djinn began scratching the area around his horns with his claws. "I'm a part of your soul, actually."

Sora was a little less scared now, though he was still glad not to have any bowels or bladder. First time in a couple years, though, he was hungry and thirsty as hell by now. "Do you have a name?"

"Of course I do. It's #(&."

Sora was bewildered.

"Uh... I don't think I can pronounce that."

"Let's hope you can. You're going to have to say it if you want to repel all of those hollows."

"So, that's what they're called? And saying you're name will repel them?"

"Uh-huh, that's what they're called. But the other thing you said was quite the over-simplification. It'll work for now, though." The djinn was not surprised to see how quick on the uptake Sora was. Sora wondered why that was, and how he could tell. Maybe this... thing... really was part of his soul.

"Uh, but I can't say..." he tried to reproduce the strange ringing sound that had come out of the djinn's throat. He was right: he couldn't say it.

"You misheard. It's #(&."

"That's what I just... tried to say."

"Then you can't hear it... yet." The djinn seemed disappointed. "Well, you'll hear it eventually. Or not."

The temperature jumped up a couple dozen degrees.

"WHAT'S HAPPENING!?" Sora was glad even more not to have bowels. After all, where does a dead man get new pants?

"The hollows are killing us. If this world falls apart before you find me in it, we're both dead."

"You're right there!"

"No shit. But I'm also in two other places, hidden. If you can't find me in those places, we'll turn into an even more dangerous hollow than these, and then we'll probably kill your sister."

Sora didn't even care that this was impossible. So was everything else that had happened since he died.

"How do I find you?!"

"This world is part of you. There is nothing here you can't find. Just feel around."

The djinn vanished.

Sora stared at where it had been.

"I HATE YOU!!"


	2. NeoIfrit

Sora wondered what was going on. First he had heard that he was being re-killed, then that he would become a monster and kill his sister.

And now the one creature that claimed that it could save him was playing hide-and-seek.

"DAMN IT!!" There had to be some way he could save himself, but... how?!

_Feel around?! Sure, why not?_

He put his hand into the magma he was standing on. It was surprisingly cool, though still rather warm. But there was nothing there.

He pretty much gave up hope at that point.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!! Huh?"

A white ribbon had just poked out of the magma. Several others followed suit. He was starting to think he really had cracked.

_What's with all the white... wait, that one's different. It's red._ It was the only lead he had, so he ran over to it. He stuck his hand into the magma, and pulled out a wakizashi with a beautiful red hilt.

_This is probably what he meant. But where's the other... There!_

More ribbons had poked out of the rocks. One of them was red.

_But how do I get there?_

As if on command, the chunk of rock the ribbon was poking out of fell away, landed in the lava, and started sinking.

"WAIT!!" He ran over and reached for the rock. The hilt of another sword was poking out.

"Well, Sora, what are you waiting for? Pull me out."

Sora was confused, but saw no real choice. He did as he was told.

"And I hope that next time I tell you my name, you will hear and remember it."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

The hollows laughed as the ate the pathetic plus lying on the ground before them. There was no way that anyone could save him.

Some of the denser ones still thought so when his reiatsu changed into a form that all hollows know and fear instinctively. They kept eating. The smarter ones ran. But they were all going to die anyway.

There was a flash of light from what they hadn't yet torn off of him.

"Flames before me, flames behind. Flames in the heart, flames in the mind. The flames of creation burn within me, NeoIfrit."

The creatures still eating all died in fire. The three who had run were already a couple yards off. Sora stomped his feet as hard as he could three times. Three balls of burning earth shot from the ground. Sora batted the fireballs at the hollows, who all got smoked simultaneously.

He was having so much fun doing this, he didn't even notice the weird mask on his face.

"Now, how to get back to Earth."


	3. Heaven vs Hell

Inoue Sora was sitting in the dirt of what he assumed to be hell, trying to figure out how he was going to leave.

_This sucks,_ he thought, putting a hand to his face. Or what should be his face.

_HOLY FUCK!! _He started trying to tear it off of his face before it polluted him.

**That's not going to help, Sora.**

"Oh, shut up, you asshole," he said to the pair of kodachi sitting in the dust beside him.

**That's not nice. If you really want rid of that damn mask, try prying it off with me. And afterwards, you might wish to re-seal me. We lose a lot of energy this way.**

Sora ripped of the mask with a sword. It was kind of a weird mask, though the hollows he had killed had all had weirder.

That's right. He had killed them. Innocent people.

NeoIfrit read his mind. **Don't worry. Killing hollows isn't the end. What you did allowed me to purify their souls. They're in Soul Society now.**

_Soul Society?_

**What you know as "heaven." Now how about you seal me?**

_How?_

**Just stop maintaining my form. It takes some focus at first, but if you ever get really powerful, it will become second nature. And it helps if you are holding me.**

_Right._ He focused on the smaller swords for a second. The kodachi shrank to match them. _Now how do we leave? Or is leaving hell possible? Or do you call hell something different too?_

**Take my word for it, hell is much worse than this. This is a place called Hueco Mundo. It's where hollows live. When they are killed by a zanpakuto, which is a sword or pair of swords similar to me, wielded by death gods, they are purified of all of the sins they have committed as a hollow. However, my power is limited to purifying those sins, and only those sins, that he or she committed as a hollow. Mortals who sin greatly before hollowfication are dragged into hell, though, as soon as their sins are answered for, a matter of a century or two, they are sent to Soul Society.**

**As for how we leave here, try focusing on melding this dimension with your own. Focus on them both, and mix and tear them both. And if this guess of mine as to how to do it doesn't work, we're probably going to be here for a while.**

Sora did so, cursing fate and NeoIfrit as he tried it. Luckily for him, a window opened in the air in front of him.

**Well, that's a relief to see. There's not much to eat here, and I don't like the though of avoiding being eaten only to see you starve. While we're at it, try focusing your power into your legs and see if you can master shunpo.**

_Shunpo?_

**A death god technique whereby they can move really fast.**

_Okay. But tell me more about these death gods. Why didn't they save me from the hollows?_

**I have no idea. There should be a death god assigned to your home, but he or she must have been busy.**

_Busy doing what? There can't be that much to do in southeastern Karakura Town, particularly for a god of death._

**You misunderstand. I didn't mean southeastern Karakura town, I meant all of Karakura town. They have so many people guarding their HQ that they can't spare too many for Earth.**

_Well, then. I no longer blame the death god watching my home. Now I blame all of the ones in a high enough rank to change that._

**Well, they have to be careful about their HQ. If that disappears, we're all fucked.**

_Maybe, but I'm still pissed. Now let's try that shunpo thing._

About fifteen minutes later, the prodigy of a death god was shunpo-ing around Karakura town, making sure to grab some finger-food from shelves as he went, so that he could fill the ghostly stomach he was now fully aware of possessing. He didn't like doing it, but he couldn't exactly pay, either. Not like the rather familiar-looking shopper crossing the street below him.

_Hey, that's our... OH NO! _He shunpo-ed down from the air, and back into it just in time to stop his sister from getting turned into fender meat by a drunk driver.

The only problem with this was that his dress-clad sister was now floating in mid-air. And in full-view of the stupid-looking orange haired pedestrian right below them.

"MOTHERFUCKER!!" He shunpo-ed down, put his sister on the side-walk, and pulled out his swords. The pedestrian looked scared, evidentially this one could see him. Not that he cared, he was more pissed than he'd ever been capable of in life, and thus was incapable of noticing anything other than the orange-haired baka-yarou.

He swung his blades wildly, each blow aimed to kill, but dodged so flawlessly that it didn't even land. Neither took note of the girls next to them until a black-haired girl (who must have been next to the orange haired jackass, but who Sora hadn't even realized was there) punched the dumb, orange fuck.

Somehow, the young man's body fell away, and his soul was pushed free. For some strange reason, his body was still wearing the school uniform he had shown up in, but his soul was wearing a black outfit and carrying an over-large kodachi about the size of NeoIfrit's bodies when he was released.

Sora was not a stupid man. "Death god, are you?" The voice was not his own, but he didn't notice or care.

"No, just a substitute. Rukia here gave me her powers while she recovered from a shot she took from a hollow."

"Well, then I can just **kill you without feeling guilty**!!


	4. Goddess of death, rempowered

Ichigo hadn't even had time to draw his sword. Whoever this hollow with the weird wakizashi was, he was fast, and it was all Ichigo could do to keep his veins devoid of steel.

Although maybe drawing a sword wasn't the best idea while this guy was still swinging his. Ichigo couldn't really tell an opponent's strength yet, but he knew this guy could probably slice through his weapon like it was made of tissue paper.

Suddenly, the creature disappeared.

_What the, _Ichigo looked behind him to see the creature raise his swords, and bring them down.

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Sora grinned a smile that was not his at all. He raised his zanpakuto, and was about to kill the foolish shinigami representative. He would make this fool pay for what he saw.

"Hello, creature."

Sora turned to see another apparently not-as-spiritually-blind-as-average teen adjusting his glasses. Sora smiled. This little geek was no threat at all.

"What's your name, shrimp?"

"My name is Uryu, and I detest both shinigami, and hollows."

"Hm. Well, I killed some hollows. And now I'm about to kill a shinigami."

"You mean the shinigami who's about to put a sword wound in your back?"

Sora spun around and raised his swords. Sure enough, the shinigami was about to slice him. He would pay for his...

Sora dropped his swords and dropped to his knees. He had just suffered a very severe pain, like he had been punched between the shoulder blades.

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"Nice shot," Ichigo said distractedly. "What was it? And what was the idea using me as a distraction?"

"You were about to do the same for me," the geek said. "I don't really see why you're complaining. As to what that was, that was a spirit arrow."

"Arrow?" Ichigo looked down. Sure enough, this geek was holding a bow.

"Mother... fuckers..."

Ichigo glanced down. "Maybe I should finish this guy?"

The hollow disappeared again.

Ichigo raised his sword.

"There!" The geek raised his bow and fired. The hollow blocked it with a wakizashi. He then re-vanished.

"BEHIND YOU!" the geek shouted.

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Ichigo opened his eyes. He was standing on a he wasn't sure what, and he wasn't sure why.

"Hello Ichigo." He heard a sweet, female voice behind him.

"Who are you? Where am I?"

"My name is Sode no Shirayuki." The owner of the voice was beautiful. She had amazing blue eyes, and was wearing a simple, white dress.

A man in his late thirties standing next to her answered the question as well. "My name is Zangetsu."

"Ok. Now where am I?"

Zangetsu answered this time. "This is your soul."

"My soul? Then what are you doing here."

"Don't blame me," Sode no Shirayuki whined. "This wasn't my idea at all. Rukia put me here."

"Rukia?!"

"That's right. I'm her shinigami powers."

"Then what's with Zangetsu?"

Zangetsu smiled. "I'm your shinigami powers. I've been sleeping here for fifteen years."

"I have shinigami powers?"

"That's what he said. Are you saying you don't believe us?" Sode no Shirayuki was just as whiny as Rukia.

"Of course, but what do I do with two of you?!"

Zangetsu smiled. "What you have to do is channel Sode No Shirayuki back into Rukia. No need to stab her: with your level of power, you should be able to do it by grabbing her arm, from there, all you need to do is unlock my power."

Ichigo smiled. "Got it."

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The hollow jumped back as Uryu blasted at him.

"Kurosaki, you idiot! What are you doing?!"

Kurosaki started running towards Kuchiki.

"KUROSAKI!"

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Rukia looked up as Ichigo grabbed her hand.

"What are you...?" She looked up at Ichigo's closed eyes.

"Just trust me," Ichigo said to her. He screwed up his face in concentration. "ZANGETSU!!"

A flash of light overcame the eyes of every spiritually aware person present.


	5. Kensei and Ryuken

Rukia awoke to find herself in an amazingly beautiful palace, which looked like it had been sculpted out of ice.

No, that wasn't it. Sculpture is a form imposed on something. The ice palace looked almost as though it had naturally grown that way.

And there was an all too familiar woman standing right in front of her.

"Sode no Shirayuki? What...?"

"I came back to you. Ichigo has his own shinigami powers, so he gave me back."

"You mean..."

"Yeah," Sode no Shirayuki smiled. "After this, we can go back."

"Then let's go..." Rukia closed her eyes. "Mai, Sode no Shirayuki!!"

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Sora shielded his eyes from the glow. When it subsided, he looked at where the two shinigami were standing.

He looked at the orange-haired dumbass. He was still looking exactly the same, but his sword had lost its hilt and guard, and now resembled nothing so much as a slab of metal with an edge.

Sending another of Uryu's spirit arrows of course so that it sailed into the stratosphere, he looked over the death goddess.

And now, she really looked the part.

Her body was lying on the ground, face-up. Her soul was wearing the same black robes as the other idiot, Kuro-suk-cok, or whatever his name was.

Her sword, however, could not be more different from his.

Pure white, with a white ribbon attached to the hilt.

There could not be any shinigami with a weapon more beautiful.

And now she was raising that weapon to kill him.

"First dance!" A circle of ice formed at Sora's feet.

"Shit!" Sora jumped upwards out of the circle before the ground could freeze around him.

"That's not going to help, hollow."

Sora glanced at the circle. Sure enough, the ice was still coming for him. He jumped so that the circle was no longer under him.

"Is that the best you've... OH SHIT!!"

He dodged another spirit arrow, this one the most powerful he'd ever seen.

And it couldn't have been fired by that Uryu geek.

Sora turned around. The only building that arrow could have come from was the hospital, because it was the only one tall enough in that direction.

Or in the whole town, for that matter.

Sora shunpo-ed towards it.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Ishida Ryuken stood in his hospital. He reflected on the part-hollow coming towards him. He'd never seen a hollow so powerful, except for some of the more dangerous Menos that he'd accidentally attracted when he sat on that pack of hollow bait. He smiled. So many interesting thing had happened when he was on vacation with his father as a child.

He smiled more widely. Those were some memories.

He loosed an arrow at the hollow's soul-chain link. The hollow shifted elevation and he only grazed the vital area.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Kensei looked at the part-hollow writhing in pain. It looked like it was in its last stages. Soon, it would either become a vizard, or a hollow.

Either way, he needed to get it away from innocent people.

He'd released his sword when he'd first noticed the commotion. Now, he spun it on his finger, and sent some reiatsu at his brother vizard.

It grazed the creature slightly, and attracted it's attention.

Kensei touched the bakudo mark on his chest.

"Shinji, it's me. Assemble the group ten miles north of Karakura town. We have a problem."


	6. The masked soldiers assembled

Hirako Shinji stood in the air ten miles north of Karakura Town.

"Well, what do you suppose Kensei found?" he asked none of his friends in particular.

Ushoda Hachigen was the one who spoke up. "I imagine one of our brothers or sisters who is having trouble controlling themselves. What else would be so urgent, yet require us to be so far from innocents?"

"If it was that, then why didn't he lead it back to the warehouse?" Kuna Masahiro asked, with a puzzled look on her face.

"Too risky," Shinji explained. "He'd have to lead it among other potential victims, into a small area that would get even a five year old to think 'ambush.' No way he'd keep it busy that way."

There was a bang, like a gun going off. A flash of black light ripped through the sky. The first thought that went through all the vizard's heads was "Cero," but it was too weak and too fast to be that.

"What.. was that?" Aigawa Love was the first to voice it, but they were all wondering.

"I saw some psuedo-arrancar working on an attack similar to that during my time in the Gotei 13," Shinji said. "I remember being amazed at the speed, but not at all intimidated by the power of the attack, or the control over it that they could demonstrate. It disintegrated a foot in front of my face." Shinji smiled. "Needless to say, I decided to waste them before they could perfect the attack. Which our brother seems to be close to doing."

Kensei dropped onto the surface of the earth. "Hachi! Raise a barrier around me and our brother when he arrives!"

Hachi didn't even ask what was going on. "Got it!" He shunpo-ed down onto the earth.

The hollow appeared in front of Kensei. The barrier appeared to block them from outside interference.

A white haired man wearing a suit and a tie with crosses on it appeared. He calmly surveyed the situation before him, and the curious faces watching him. Well, except one, which was unfazed.

"Hm. Hirnenkyaku, was it?" Shinji inquired.

"Yes. So that means you know what I am." the Quincy replied.

"Yes, I do. What is your name?"

"Ishida Ryuken. I'm the one who put the hole in this hollow."

"So, that was you. I'd say it was a good shot, if I thought you did it on purpose. Since I doubt you did, I'd have to say you need some practice."

"Yeah, it's been a while since I fought a hollow." He smiled. " I haven't since I got married." The smile vanished. "So, what's going on in there?"

"We're keeping that guy occupied until we're sure which side will win out: the hollow, or the shinigami," Shinji stated.

"Shinigami?" Ryuken was puzzled.

"Yeah, I think that kid was a plus with shinigami abilities buried in his soul. When he started turning into a hollow, they manifested and stopped him from completely going over. "

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Time. I'll take over," Yadomaru Lisa stood up.

"Well, I'll be going. I only wanted to ensure that my son would not be injured by this hollow. Now that I see you have it taken care of, I have no more business here." Ryuken stood and turned away.

A blonde girl in a red jogging suit stood up."Are you sure you don't want to watch?" she asked.

Ryuken turned his head towards the group. "Promise me that if this gets out of hand, you'll kill him before he injures any innocent souls."

"Done," Shinji and the blonde said in unison.

Ryuken hirnenkyaku-ed away without another word.


	7. Ametralladora

Yadomaru Lisa walked into the barrier.

"I'm Yadomaru Lisa. Pleased to make your acquaintance."

The hollow turned it's head to look at her. It had the typical feral look in it's eyes as it growled. It made a fist and pointed it at her.

And then suddenly sent the bullet-cero it had been practicing that whole fight straight at Kensei.

He shunpo-ed out of the way, and then hastily left the barrier. He raised a hand and turned it to face the vizard to be.

Who seemed still sane enough to register what Kensei was doing. Another bullet-cero flew at the one finger pointing to the sky. Hachi discerned what was going on and closed the barrier so that it blocked the attack.

Kensei raised his other hand and doubled the gesture.

"HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!" he crowed. "CAN'T GET ME!!"

Shinji had had enough. "For Kami's sake, stop flipping the poor thing the bird. He might remember when he turns sane again. Or if the rotation ends up giving you another shift."

Kensei turned his head to face him, not troubling to lower his hands or middle fingers. "Come on, he's completely out of it. It's not like he's going to remember..."

"Every vizard transformation is unique, Kensei," Hachi contributed. "If anyone in Seireitei heard of a part-hollow who was more suited for bakudo than fighting, they wouldn't believe a word of it. But that's the case for me."

"Let's just watch the fight, shall we?" Sarugaki Hiryori called to the rest.

As if on cue, the hollow stopped trying to knock down the barrier to kill Kensei, and turned around to face Lisa. He raised his fist and pointed it at her.

"Bala." He blasted her with a mini-cero.

She deflected it. The attack went into the barrier and exploded.

He looked at her, mildly surprised and confused.

"Bala."

She blocked it again.

He really started to look confused.

He repeated the experiment several times, and then lowered his fist and pondered her abilities.

Finally, he raised his fist again.

"Ametralladora."

"OH SHIT!!"

She dodged the cloud of mini-cero. (Or _balas_, as he seemed to have dubbed them.)

The vizard took a few seconds to register this scene.

Hiyori was the first to regain use of her vocal chords.

"WHAT THE _**FUCK**_!!"


	8. The coronation of the king

Yadomaru Lisa watched through her gold and black eyes as the attack aimed for her slammed into the barrier Hachigen had created. It would have killed her if it had hit, and she certainly couldn't have blocked it, but as long as he didn't attack with it from close range, she could dodge easily enough, as long as she had her mask on.

She reflected on the attacks he was using. Yes, they were certainly aptly named. "Bala," which he had named using the spanish word for "bullet" was certainly fast enough to earn the name. Not so fast as to be impossible to dodge, but still pretty nasty. Anyone weaker than Vice-Captain level would have some trouble getting out of the way. And blocking it was difficult too, though easier than dodging by far.

But ametralladora was different. That many fast-moving attacks coming at you simultaneously made blocking next to impossible for anyone less skilled in bakudo than Hachi. She certainly couldn't have managed it. It was as dangerous to your average soul as a machine gun, which in spanish was called an "ametralladora," was to your average mortal soldier.

Her only option had been to dodge, and that wasn't easy either. At least, it wouldn't have been for an average shinigami. Or even for an average shinigami Vice-Captain. She was neither. She was a vizard. She was a masked soldier. And she was as close to invincible as anyone without a bankai could get.

She didn't see any reason why she couldn't keep fighting the hollow as long as the boy in front of her could. It had some good techniques, but since that creature was going to be impressed into the group if it's shinigami side prevailed, that was just one more reason not to kill them both before they reached their peak. It would have been a waste of a man who could have become her brother.

She smiled. The fact that he would probably end up becoming a member of the family didn't necessarily mean that she would get along with him any better than she was getting along with her current siblings, or as well as Hiyori got along with Shinji. Though she'd certainly be willing to try. Only getting along with him as well as those two got along would be a tragedy. Getting along worse might blunt both of their swords.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Sora-nii? Why couldn't you protect me?" Orihime was weeping openly as the girl who had sworn to protect her and the boy who had seen her a little too well held and comforted her.

Sora, meanwhile, couldn't hold her himself because the car that had taken his life was conveniently (to the asshole in black robes with the giant sword) parked on Sora's back.

"RHRHRHHRHRH!!" He struggled as hard as he could, but there were some laws of physics even shinigami couldn't break.

"Hahahaha!!" the orange haired mofo in the black robes crowed. "Feeling weak!?"

"Don't worry, Orihime-chan," the black-haired girl crooned. "Just because your nii-baka will never have enough power to protect you doesn't mean we don't already."

"I'M RIGHT HERE LISTENING!!"

"Tatsuki-chan, did you hear something?" Orihime looked around. She clearly couldn't see him in Sora's nightmares, either.

"ORIHIME!!"

"She can't see you, you fool. And she never will again. The hollow will see to that."

There was a flash of light as Sora's rage exploded within his soul.

He opened his eyes. The hollow was charging him.

It didn't matter.

"JINTEKI SHAKUSETU, NEO-IFRIT!!"

The flaming swords in the hollow's hands vanished. A pair of double-edged daggers appeared in Sora's. A green-bladed one in his right, and a purple one in his left. The green one had an image of a cobra on one edge, and a skull on the other.

The purple one had no designs. There were two shades, though. One of the edges was dark purple, the other might as well have been black.

He stuck his fingers into the loop on each blade, and spun them, one on each hand.

He raised his right hand, and sent the green blade into the hollow's arm.

The hollow screamed as his blood started turning the same shade of green as the blade. He fell, clutching the poisoned wound. He started struggling to breathe.

"ffffuuu...cccckkyuuuu..."

"Fuck you, too."

There was a flash of purple light from Sora's left hand. The dagger in it disappeared. A strange, vaguely human shaped object with no legs, purple robes and a long, metal right claw came into being behind the hollow.

It raised it's claw over what should have been it's head.

"uuuuu... cannnnttt... makkmeee... begg for... deeefeeet..."

"Then I won't try. Jinteki shakusetu, Neo-Ifrit."

The claw decended and tore out the hollow's reiatsu, focusing it into the shape of an orb in the claw.

"eeyyyyyylllllll... keeeppppuuhhh... fytiiinnnnnng... yuuuu..."

"Yes, you probably will."

"eeyyyyyylllllll... beeeeee... thuuuuuhhhh... keeeeennnnng..."

"No, you won't."

"eeyyyyyylllllll... keeeppppuuhhh... fytiiinnnnnng... yuuuu... untilllllll... eyeeeemmmm... thuuuu... keeeeennnnng... "

"You'll keep fighting until we stop existing, if that's the case. But this fight is over." Sora snapped his fingers.

The claw contracted, and the orb shattered.


	9. Cards on the table

Urahara Kisuke stepped out onto the street. He was worried, but he didn't show it.

"Well, Rukia, you seem to have gotten your powers back already!"

Rukia gave him a glare that would have made Ichimaru Gin stop smiling and drop his jaw with shock. "No thanks to you."

_Oh, crap, she knows, _he thought. "What is that supposed to mean?" he pretended to feel hurt, and continued. "I gave you a false body to rest in and here you repay me with unfounded..."

"You know damn well what I mean! Give me a gigai that doesn't have lethality stone in it right now!" By this time, Gin would have opened his eyes with disbelief. "And get whatever piece of garbage you tucked into my soul out of there right this second!"

He knew this was going to be a problem. He wasn't afraid of being killed by Rukia, but if the Orb of Disruption got into Aizen's hands, Aizen probably could and would kill him, especially if he used it on Gin and Kaname, instead of just using it on himself. He had to run damage control before this got too out of hand.

"I'm sorry, Rukia, but that piece of garbage is a lot more important than what you seem to think it is, and it's going to have to stay where it is." Kisuke put a thumb on the joining section of his cane, in case Benihime might need to intervene in whatever might go on here. "I will, however, get you a gigai that won't damage your abilities."

"Wrong answer, shopkeeper. Get this thing out of me, or I'll..."

Kisuke shunpo-ed behind her, and grabbed her sword arm. She struggled to free herself, but that just wasn't going to happen. They looked into each others eyes.

"Just because I'm a shopkeeper does not mean I can't handle myself in a fight, young lady. Is that clear?"

He looked at Rukia's eyes. She was a little intimidated, but mostly pissed off. If Hisana was anything like this, then he could see why Byakuya-taicho was so damn quiet.

"I'm not going to ask how you knew this. I imagine Sode no Shirayuki had a quick look inside your soul and at your gigai when you got her back, though I thought I had buried it inside your soul so deeply that she'd never find it. I imagine the gigai's influence had something to do with that."

"Well, I was hoping that my plan would work. If it had, you would have become a normal human, and retrieving the item I inserted into your soul would be impossible. Once an object is stored inside a person's soul, the object stays there until the soul is destroyed completely, either by destroying a hollow without purifying it, or by using a weapon like the Soukyou, which leaves no corpse, and no residue to be reborn in the mortal realm. There is another way, but as far as I know, the people trying to get the object can't do that one."

"What way is that?" Ichigo had been listening this whole time. Uryu had left when the hollow fled towards the hospital. He seemed to be following it.

Kisuke looked solemn. "There is a machine that Soul Society possesses, that can remove objects imbedded in a soul. This method will not harm you, but if the people trying to get the object use this method, they'll probably kill you afterwards anyway."

Rukia wasn't satisfied at all. "What is the object, who wants it, why do they want it, and _**why can't they have it**_?!"

"Four questions, two answers. The object is the Orb of Disruption, and it can be used to blur the line between hollows and shinigami. Hollows who are subjected to it have their masks torn off and have their powers increased. If this increase is great enough, they can seal the power in a zanpakuto. Shinigami who are subjected to it gain the power to form hollow masks on their faces. The power increase they enjoy in this masked state is so great that three captains using this power could probably take on the rest of Seireitei."

Rukia was no longer angry. Now, she was scared. "The only question that doesn't answer is who wants it," she stated.

"At least three captains of the Gotei Thirteen are in on this plot. Tosen Kaname, Ichimaru Gin, and the ringleader, Aizen Sosuke."

"That's impossible."

"I'm afraid not. The Aizen you know, the friendly intellectual in the glasses, is, in the words of the mortal philosopher Carl Jung, a persona. The shadow behind him is planning to destroy Seireitei, Rukongai, and at least part of the mortal world. I don't know how he recruited Gin, but it probably has something to do with the fact that Gin used to be his Vice-Captain."

Rukia was still in denial, and Kisuke could see that. He could also see that she was willing to hear him out, so he kept going.

"For a long time, Tosen has wanted to find a 'path of least bloodshed' that could potentially bring peace. I can only assume that Aizen appealed to him by promising to bring said peace."

"Is there anyone else in on it, hat-and-clogs?" Ichigo had returned his sword to his back once he saw Kisuke over-power Rukia. He seemed to have figured out how little chance the creature stood against him.

"He has certainly recruited three of the gatekeepers of Seireitei. The only one I'm not sure about is Jidanbo. The others are certainly in his pocket."

"There are hollows in his pocket, too."

Now Rukia was really getting nervous. "How powerful are they?"

"Very. I'll explain this to you both, because even though Rukia will probably understand without it, Ichigo won't. There are hollows that eat other hollows, called menos.

"There are three classes. Menos grande are the most commonly found, the biggest, the dumbest, and the weakest. Any of us standing here could certainly kill one."

"Then there are menos adujchas. Rukia and I could certainly kill one. Kurosaki is almost as powerful as Rukia is, and probably could too."

Ichigo's eyes narrowed, but he kept his mouth shut.

"Then there are the vasto lordes, who probably number less than a dozen, and I hope number less than five." Kisuke sighed. "I'm not really sure I could take one. If Aizen recruits ten of them, we're all in trouble."

"Aizen has a few dozen regular hollows. The rest are mostly gillians with adujchas thrown in occasionally. He probably won't be able to persuade any vasto lordes without getting his hands on the Orb. He definitely hasn't gotten any yet. That's one of the few specifics of his army that I can say with certainty."

"Gillians?" Ichigo didn't understand. "And who are the gatekeepers of Seireitei, and what is the Gotei Thirteen? And what is lethality stone, and what is the Soukyou?"

"Oh, sorry. Menos grande is a slang term for 'menos gillian' used in Seireitei. And Seireitei is the capital of Soul Society, which has gate for each cardinal direction. Three of these gates are guarded by traitors. The fourth might be too. The Gotei Thirteen is the largest branch of Soul Society's army. The other two are the special forces, and the omnikitsudo. The special forces handle the really tough missions while the omnikitsudo move shinigami to and from the real world and handle executions. The Gotei Thirteen handle anything else that has to be done."

"Executions?"

"Yeah, Seireitei does that too. The laws there are pretty strict. And Rukia has violated one by lending you her powers. I very much hope nobody finds out. It's a capital offense. You might both be killed before I can arrive to help you."

Rukia was unfazed. Ichigo was not.

"The Soukyou is a weapon that is used by the omnikitsudo for these executions. It is so powerful and so difficult to use that it is reserved for captain level criminals, and so difficult to aim that it is completely useless in combat." He took a breath, and remembered how close he came to getting that treatment all those years ago. Thank Kami exile was chosen for him instead. "Lethality stone is a material used to block spirit power. The walls of Seireitei are composed of it. The power it has to nullify spirit attacks means that the only ways in are the four gates. There is a pit in Seireitei somewhere that was used for executions in the case of a lesser officer becoming a criminal. The lethality stone nullified their powers, and then the forces of law and order shoved hollows into the pit. They eventually stopped this practice because they thought it was cruel."

Ichigo was starting to sweat.

"So that's it. Any questions?"

Ichigo was disturbed, but not about to ask questions. At least, not any more of Kisuke. He was very tempted to ask the leaders of Seireitei what the fuck their problem was.

"I have two," a timid female voice spoke up. "What is a hollow, and why were you fighting my brother?"


	10. Sora's new family

Inoue Sora opened his eyes slowly.

"Hey," a strange, female sounding voice called.

He opened them completely. The owner of the voice seemed to be a girl with green hair and a white bodysuit with a sword strapped to her back.

Sora laughed weakly. "The sad part is, you actually aren't the strangest thing I've seen all day."

"What do you mean, she isn't the strangest thing you've seen all day?" another female voice joined the conversation. "You've been out for at least that long, and she's the strangest thing in this room."

The first girl pouted. "No, I'm not!" she whined. "Kensei is standing right over there!"

"Why don't you slow down and introduce me to the strange-kids club?" Sora looked over at the two people the green-haired girl was pointing to. One was a girl wearing a schoolgirl outfit and carrying a sword on her hip and a porno book in her hand. The other was a white-haired boy wearing a basketball jersey and carrying...

"Why are you all carrying swords?"

"Why are you?" the porno-girl replied.

"Uh, well, you wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"If it's for any reason other than because there is a sentient spirit inhabiting them that can talk to you and purify hollows, I'll eat my favorite book."

"Oh, so I'm not crazy. Thank Kami."

"Well, I wouldn't say that just yet," she said. "You might be, but then we all would be." She still hadn't looked up from the book.

**_xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo_**

"Wow, this place is huuuuuuuuuugggggggggggeeeeeeee!!"

"Shut up, hat-and-clogs." Ichigo looked around. This place was huge.

"So, what are we going to be doing here?" Rukia asked, looking around the huge place with a stunned look on her face. Did I mention this place was huge?

"We're going to be training. Hard. My first plan didn't work, so I'll have to do something else to keep the Orb of Distruption safe. That something will be letting you keep it inside you, and ensuring that it is never removed from your soul. If you die of natural causes with it inside you, it will pass back into the mortal realm with you, and then we'll probably never find it again." He turned to Rukia and looked into her eyes. "And that is certainly the best outcome we can hope for at this point."

**_xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo_**

Sora looked around at the group assembled before him. They might have been the strangest group he had ever seen. The leader was a kid with blonde hair who let himself get bullied by a little girl in pigtails. The guy in charge of security was a giant who didn't like fighting. Then there was the music freak with the long hair and the wierdo with the afro.

And lets not forget the three people in the room when he woke up.

"Okay, who are you guys?"

"Simple... we're people just like you." The leader spoke up.

"I doubt that," Sora said simply. "You don't know what I'm like."

"If you think we don't know about that hollow sitting in your soul, we do," Shinji (the leader) said. "And as for not being like you..." Shinji dramatically passed his hand over his face. A tiki-looking mask appeared. "You couldn't be more wrong."

Sora really didn't care to keep arguing that point. "Okay, so what do you want?"

"We want you to join us. And you will."

"Why will I? I don't really like doing favors for people who don't say "please."

"Well, what will you do instead? Not many people like part-hollows. And those who do might be a little put off by your... performance... in the city."

Sora thought for a second. "Well, I am a ghost. I'll haunt a house."

The other vizard chuckled, some in amusement, one at his expense. "Yeah, right," the blonde bully in the jogging suit said. "Haunt a house? The shinigami will be on you before you know it, and you won't be able to fight for too long without going hollow, at which point they'll send the elites after you. Admit it: you need us."

"I could haunt my sister's house. All I need to do is tell her who I am, and she'll be happier than she's been in years."

"Until the shinigami come. Then, they might kill her alongside you." Kensei spoke up.

"They wouldn't." Sora said these words with an attempt at sounding certain. It didn't work.

"They probably would. The shinigami are a bunch of assholes, or at least most of them are." Love was the one who spoke up this time. "When we were the higher-ups, things were different. But right now, I'd say the only way you could be sure the shinigami wouldn't kill your sister too, is if all of the shinigami who attacked you were from the Eleventh or Thirteenth Division of the Thirteen Court Guardian divisions. The First would likely let her be, unless she tried to stop them. The rest would be very likely to kill her."

"So, the best I can hope for is fighting for you, instead of fighting alone?"

"Oh, I wouldn't say that. I could teach you binding spells. You could learn how to create barriers. I'll teach you everything I know, and then, if either develops a new technique, we could both learn it." Guess who told him that.

"And I wouldn't have to fight?"

"No, you wouldn't, but it would make our lives easier," Kuna Masahiro offered.

"Well, we'll work that out later." Shinji smiled. "So, you in, big guy, or do we have to call the shinigami?"

"Please don't joke like that, Shinji." Sora took a breath. "Well, anyway, since you put it that way... I'm in."


	11. Binding and Destruction

"Disintegrate, Black Dog of Rondanini. Look upon yourself and burn. Tear away your own throat! Bakudo: Number Nine...Strike!!" Sora gathered the energy in his hand and sent it at his masked opponent.

"Damn... you..." Sarugaki Hiyori started struggling against the red light which had engulfed her.

"Wow." Hachigen started towards them. "To do that much with such a low-level spell... You might actually get better than me."

Sora closed his eyes and laughed. He was getting good at this. He might never even have to use his weapons, even if he did fight a shinigami.

A burst of blood-red light shot from the enraged girl. She was free. She raised her sword and started slashing even more furiously than before. Sora, afraid for his life, started parrying and blocking.

He had stopped about twenty slashes when his mask shattered on his face.

The very next attack sent him flying backwards about thirty feet.

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Ye Lord, Mask of blood and flesh, all creation, flutter of wings, ye who bears the name of Man, Inferno and pandemonium, The sea barrier surges, March on to the south! Hado: Number Thirty-one... Shot of Red Fire!" Kurosaki Ichigo's spell sent a giant ball of red reiatsu into the wall of the training area. Kami be praised they weren't training anywhere near innocent people.

"Man, if the incantation weren't so damn lame, I'd use that as my opening move!"

"Try doing it without the incantation this time, then. Like you did with One and Four." Rukia had insisted on teaching him kido while Urahara was away, instead of letting Ichigo rest from his sword training.

"Hado: Number Thirty-One... Shot of Red Fire!" A barely-any-weaker spell shot through the air, and made an almost identical crater. "It's perfect."

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Twenty minutes, three seconds. Not bad, considering this is your first day of training." Kensei looked up from the stopwatch. Sora was clutching a slight cut that Hiyori had put on his arm in her rage at being struck with a binding spell.

"Man, that spell only held her for eight seconds. I need more practice." Sora removed his hand from the cut so that Hachigen could reject the wound.

"I won't deny that you can become much more powerful with practice, but that spell was still expertly made. Holding Hiyori for eight seconds while she's wearing her mask is about as impressive as holding an average shinigami fukutaicho for five minutes." Hachigen sighed. "Try using the mask again."

--One ass kicking later--

"Twenty minutes, ten seconds. You catch on quick." Kensei pocketed the watch. "Time for lunch."

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

The two shinigami slashed at each other mercilessly. The one with the bucket-hat smiled slightly. Kurosaki learned quickly, for such a dense human.

Kurosaki suddenly jumped back. He raised his hand menacingly.

"Bakudo: Number One... Restrain!"

Kisuke's hands shot behind his back. He dropped to his knees. His face hit the ground. His tongue tasted dirt.

**Please review... having only three with ten chapters hurts my feelings.**


	12. Transfer Student

"So, Yumichika, Tadakatsu. What do you think of what's going on?" Eleventh Division Third Seat Madarame Ikkaku sat in the division headquarters with his best friend, Fifth Seat Ayasegawa Yumichika and his immediate subordinate, Fourth Seat Miyanioto Tadakatsu.

"I think it's strange that Kuchiki would be the one to break the law. I mean, you'd think her brother would have taught her better." Yumichika sighed. "This is an ugly situation."

"Yeah, I know." The third man closed his eyes. "I wonder why we can't find her reiatsu. If she's accepting help from somebody, it's probably someone she thinks can fight us effectively." He opened his eyes. The "whites" of his eyes were black, and his irises were red. "She's just about at fukutaicho level, maybe higher. If she decided to become a vizard, we're all in trouble."

Ikkaku grinned. "Wow, I didn't even know you knew what a 'vizard' was."

Miyamoto smiled. "Same way you didn't know half the division knows about Ryumon Houzukimaru!"

"WHAT!?"

"Keep your voice down, Ikkaku." Yumichika smiled. "Nobody in this division is going to turn rat, because the rest of us all admire you keeping it secret so much that he'd get twelve ass-kickings a day."

"But, how do they know?" Ikkaku was in a sweat.

"Well, most of the division is perceptive enough to see your confidence, of a sort that only one power can create." He grinned ear to ear. "I let slip to Abarai that I knew, and that I knew he knew. He told me it's name, after I assured him I wasn't going to rat. I don't think anyone else knows it's name."

"Oh, and the two of us, not to mention the captain, know about your shikai's really cool attack, so don't laugh too hard, Fifth Seat."

Yumichika's grin faltered. "Does anyone else?"

"No. The signs of a kido type blade that can whip ass on most, if not all, fukutaicho are somewhat less obvious."

"But, yeah, I've know for a while." Ikkaku rejoined. "Don't worry. Nobody who is going to make fun of you or tell anyone who is is aware of your abilities."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Hello, class. Is everyone here?" Somehow, nobody even remembered that Rukia had been a member of the class. Except Ishida Uryu, he probably did. But he was great at not showing it.

"Good. I have a special announcement. Please welcome your new classmate: Matsumoto Rangiku!"


	13. Uryu's nightmare

"Hi, everyone!" The new student bowed deeply. She clearly didn't care about the formality, she just wanted to see if they'd fall out of her uniform if she turned her chest at a right angle to her pelvis. "I look forward to being friends with all of you!"

Chizuru and most of the boys looked forward to that, too.

Ichigo turned his fingers in midair. A red ribbon shot out from her body and wrapped around them. He looked deeply into her eyes as she held up a finger. Another red ribbon shot out, this time from Ichigo.

Uryu sat in his chair and cursed his Kami.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"So, what do you think, Chad?" The boy talking looked up from the cockatiel. "Cute little parakeet, huh?"

Yasutora Sado looked over the cockatiel...

And immediately found an iron bar fighting his head for territorial rights.

"Are you okay?" The boy asking knew the answer. Chad was always okay. It was a rhetorical question asked out of incredulity. Nobody should be able to survive that, but everyone present knew that Chad would not even feel it in the morning.

"Yeah, I'm fine."He looked down at the cockatiel. "Hey, little guy."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Sora really had improved quickly. He was now able to hold his mask for one hour and nine minutes, and hold Hiyori for three and one third minutes. An average taicho would break that spell after twenty-five minutes. (Unless, of course, Hiyori's abilities had improved as she broke spells more often. Then it would be longer, as Hachigen reminded the group.)

He had all the power he would need for a while. Now all he needed was some more motivation to get power. His sister couldn't see him, he would be safe visiting her for a few minutes, maybe an hour.

As long as the Quincy (he had learned that name from the vizard after describing Ishida's powers,) and the sicko didn't see or sense him, he was safe for longer.

He wouldn't do any harm... he could control the creature now. Everything would be okay... he should get to see her, after all the work he's been doing...

Nobody would hurt him...

Kurosaki, Ishida, and Matsumoto all simultaneously sneezed.

So did a certain white haired fox-face sitting invisibly on the roof of Karakura High.

_Hm... I guess Rangiku-chan can't stop talking about how amazing I am... when this mission is over I gotta remember to ask her out..._

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Wow Sado-kun, that's a nice bird, can I see him more closely?"

"Sure, Matsumoto-san." He handed it over, and she saw his hand more closely. "Oh Kami, what happened to you?!"

"I got hit by a motorcycle on the way to school. The guy riding it was injured, so I carried him to the hospital."

Luckily, she had thought to research this place before coming here, so she didn't have to ask any embarrassing questions.

"Hi, Matsumoto-chan!! Let me welcome you to our..." Tatsuki was saved from having to intervene when Rangiku sent Chizuru into a wall herself.

Gin was outside the window looking in. He vowed to himself and to Kami that if that mortal bitch tried that again, he would get his gigai and beat her to a pulp.

**Please review... having more chapters than reviews hurts.**


	14. A Brother's visit

Three shinigami at his school...

Why did Kami hate him so much?

Ishida Uryu moaned in emotional pain as he reached out. The three red ribbons shot out into his hand. Kurosaki's, Matsumoto's, and he wasn't sure who else's. He knew it wasn't Rukia's. He also knew that Matsumoto would know, but he wasn't sinking that low, to ask a question of a shinigami.

There was one shinigami he knew who had one redeeming quality, however small: as far as he knew, Kurosaki Ichigo was not on the same side as the rest of those assholes, and never had been.

To be fair, he wasn't sure Rukia still was, but he really didn't care at this point. Kurosaki would know where she was, but again, he wouldn't stoop that low.

A fourth red ribbon shot through the air. Ishida touched it, and almost cried out with disbelief.

"Motherfucker..." he said under his breath.

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"ACHOOO!!"

Inoue Sora sat at the top of the high school as he sneezed.

"Wow, Sis still hasn't forgotten about me, huh?"

**That's 'us' to you, cocklicker**, Acidwire said in Sora's head.

_Same thing, right?_ Sora thought to him.

_**"NO!"**_ the spirits thought-yelled.

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Gin toyed with the two other spirit ribbons. He was surprised, but kind of happy, to see a third appear.

He shunpoed away towards it.

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Rangiku and Ichigo felt the new presence immediately as Gin did.

They looked at each other menacingly, as though each was daring the other to investigate so that they could attack.

Rangiku had not felt this presence before, but she knew that any creature down in this world with shinigami powers had to be investigated. Ichigo knew what it was and he wanted nothing more than to blast it clear to Seireitei for what it had tried to do to him.

If Ichigo noticed Uryu getting up, he gave no hint. Rangiku neither noticed or cared.


	15. Shinso vs Acidwire

"Hey. How are ya?" Ichimaru Gin walked up to the man with the double zanpakuto, observing that he wasn't wearing a normal shinigami uniform. He was wearing a plain white T-Shirt and blue jeans. "Where'd ya get tha swords?"

The man smiled as he heard a sneeze in his head. "I found them somewhere in my soul."

"Likely story."

"I didn't steal them, if that's what you mean."

"Now who's accusin' ya of that?"

"You are, shinigami."

"Wow... you are bright... IKOROSE, SHINSO!!"

The man jumped aside and clutched at his face. A mask appeared to obscure it.

The next instant, he was gone.

And then he was behind Gin.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Ishida Uryu moved through the halls at a quick walking pace, not wishing to draw attention.

He came to the roof, and looked on.

The hollow with the swords was effortlessly dodging blows, while the shinigami was fighting for his life. The Death God attacked skillfully, but always in vain. There was no way he could land a killing blow.

The hollow, however, was not working at all, and yet had almost killed the shinigami ten times in half as many seconds.

The shinigami looked at Uryu, and smiled.

"Die."

There was nothing Ishida could do to stop the blade.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"You okay, kid?" Inoue Sora stood in front of Ishida, with his back to the Quincy and his eyes on the shinigami. The shinigami was the one to be afraid of, if either of the opponents was. With Sora's newfound power, Ishida was no longer a threat.

Shinigami taicho, however, are not discounted no matter what level you are.

Even if you are holding the shinigami's weapon by the blunt edge, as Sora was doing.

And Gin wanted to prove it, if the whispers coming from his lips were any indication.

Uryu had never fought a shinigami and knew little about kido. But he still knew that those whispers were death.

Sora, however, had mastered nine bakudo, and knew what that branch could do fairly well.

He also knew, from training with Hiyori, what hado could do with the incantation spoken aloud.

He could dodge it easily, but that would be the end of the man who might very well be the last Quincy. Blocking it might injure him, so he decided to just nip it in the bud.

"CERO!!"

"Hado number fift-OH SHIT!!"

The reiatsu dispersed as the shinigami taicho retracted Shinso and shunpoed aside.

To find Sora's fist pointed at him as he stopped to send Shinso at him again.

"IKOR..."

"Bala."

Gin staggered back a few feet and clutched his stomach.

"Bala."

Gin fell, and tried to raise himself to keep fighting.

There was only one way to make sure Gin stayed down for any length of time. Bala was not damaging enough, Cero was too easy to dodge.

But the other way was too draining.

There was nothing else for it, he would have to waste the asshole, and then run before backup arrived.

"Ametralladora."

**Okay. Why is it that I have to specifically request reviews?**

**Thanks be to gameroy, who doesn't wait to be asked.**


	16. Father and Son get pissed

_Kuso kuso kuso kuso kuso kuso kuso! _Inoue Sora fled from the scene as quickly as he could, not daring to release his hollow form for fear that he would need the speed boost it gave him.

It was too bad that he had ended up in mortal combat when all he had wanted to do was visit his sister, but at the moment self-pity was a secondary concern.

All he wanted to do now was escape.

Taking out that captain was too easy, there had to be some...

_KUSO!!_

Limiter seals. Of course.

That shinigami was wearing a captain's uniform.

If he had been under the limiter's influence when he had fought Sora...

This shinigami was fighting at around a fifth of Sora's power. Limiters drained four-fifths of an officer's reiatsu.

This fox-faced motherfucker was truly a worthy opponent. He hadn't seemed like one, but he truly was.

Sora had to escape. His next opponent would be around as strong, and would certainly ask for the limiter requirement to be dispensed with.

He spotted the vizard warehouse, and ducked through Hachigen's unique bakudo about as quickly as he could.

He was finally safe...

Is what he was still thinking when Hiyori's foot slammed down on his face.

He'd have started bleeding profusely if Acidwire's mask hadn't blocked most of the force.

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"What the hell?" Ishida Uryu looked at the strange shinigami in the strange head-dress with the strangely quiet girl sitting next to him. They seemed to have appeared from nothing.

"Go away, ningen."

The hand bearing Uryu's Quincy Cross shot up. Kojaku blazed into existence and sent a spirit arrow right at the shinigami with the head-dress.

"A Quincy? I'm not interested in you. I have dissected the souls of 2,661 Quincy and they were all more powerful than you."

"Here's a picture of the latest one, if you are interested."

"May I see that, Uryu?"

Ishida Uryu looked up and saw a silver-haired man standing behind him.

"Where the fuck did you come, Ryuken?"

"Blame your grandparents."

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"What you did was amazingly irresponsible! I cannot believe you would go to such a serious risk for just one more glimpse of your sister!" Kensei was shouting at the top of his lungs in his rage.

"Yeah... how about we pretend I already know I'm an idiot, and you can't make me feel any worse about it?" Sora was still a little shaken by the realization that he could have and frankly should have died, except Seireitei has a hard-on about making their subordinates lives difficult. "Seriously, I get it. That bastard, Gin or whatever you guys called him, really could have fought me to a draw or even killed me if he'd been going one hundred percent. Thank Kami for whichever idiot designed those limiter seals."

"Yeah, I can't say I would have agreed with that sentiment a century ago. But now I guess it's a good thing they exist." Kensei seemed to have gotten the rage out of his system. "Okay. Hiyori, you have a new task to do around here. From now on, you get to hold the stopwatch while _I_ kick this guy's ass. He needs a more powerful training partner, and I think I'm the best we've got. Well, unless Shinji wants to do it."

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Kurotsuchi Mayuri stood still and tried to figure out why the elder Quincy was standing so close to him. The Quincy didn't look like a homo, so that probably wasn't it.

He felt a sting, looked down, and saw the Quincy holding something next to Mayuri's chest.

No, not next to. Inside of.

The Quincy had moved so quickly that he had pulled out a sword to impale Mayuri, and actually completed an attack, without Mayuri having noticed.

**Three more reviews, and I'll finally have more of them than chapters.**

**You can do it, guys!**


	17. The Masked Soldiers Invade

"OWWWWW... The PAiiiiiiinnnn." Kurotsuchi Mayuri was going out of his way to taunt the two Quincy, and to disappoint gameroy. "IIITtttttt hurRRRRtTTTTsssss..."

"What the fuck..." Ishida Uryu was at a loss as to how the fuck this was possible.

"Kakimushire, Ashisogi Jizo!" Ishida Ryuken jumped back to avoid getting sliced by the three golden blades that shot from his enemies sword.

"Die, Quincy scum!" Mayuri jumped at Ryuken, sending his sword straight at Ryuken's heart.

Ryuken jumped aside as he slashed at the weapon, sending it into the roof under their feet.

"Damn that sword... I thought you dumb shits only used bows!"

Ryuken only smiled as Mayuri tugged his sword out of the roof.

"Die!" Mayuri jumped at... Uryu.

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"How are things going out there?" Inoue Sora looked at Hirako Shinji, who had just returned from the outside world.

"Badly. There seems to be a fight between two Quincy and two shinigami on the roof of your sister's school. The first Quincy left his class to attack you, and the second arrived to back him up. The shinigami arrived to heal their injured comrade."

He looked over at the other masked soldiers.

"Hey, Hiyori, do you remember the creepy third seat from your division? The guy they took out of the shinigami madhouse? The guy who took over your division after you and Kisuke left? He and his fukutaicho are the two shinigami."

"This fight is my fault..."

"Not at all, Sora. A Quincy, an outlaw shinigami, a fukutaicho shinigami looking for an opportunity to fight the outlaw... your sister's class was bound to have a fight eventually. You merely hastened the inevitable."

"Hachi's powers already restored my reiatsu. I want to go back and fight!"

"That's a bad idea. Which side would you join?" Kensei spoke up.

"The outlaw shinigami is one of my sister's closest friends. I'm going to find him and join his!"

"If he let's you live long enough," Hirako pointed out. "He's already seen you as a rabid hollow..."

"I'll show up without my mask!"

The masked soldiers looked at each other.

Lisa responded first. "Hachi, do you think you could restrain this guy?"

Hachi hesitated for a second.

"All he wants to do is protect his sister. Shouldn't we let him?"

"He could use some more combat experience..." Hiyori stood up. "If I go with him, won't it be okay?"

"This is a bad idea..." Masahiro Kuna stood as well. "But if we're doing it, I'll help."

"What the hell." Kensei stood too. "I'm in."

"The rest of us should stay here. Hachi especially. He has to keep the barrier up, and the rest of us should stay in case something goes wrong, like someone finding this place." Shinji sat in the seat Kensei had vacated. "The rest of you might as well do what you can to help."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Kurotsuchi Mayuri collapsed as his chain-link was destroyed.

He made sure to fall directly upon Ashisogi Jizo.

His body began to melt, making it impossible for Ryuken to hit his other important point.

"Thank you, Quincy. I've always wondered what effect an injury like that would have on this form..."

**Do yourselves a favor. Read at least one of the stories of my favorite stories list each, and preferably more. They are good, or they wouldn't be there.**

**And start reading from the two "favorite authors" I designated.**

**And will you guys please review my story?**

**And at least read my other one?**


	18. Paying Back a Debt

**xoxoxox flashback begins xoxoxox**

"Is this really safe, Aizen-taicho?" Hinamori walked alongside her superior on the way to the Senkai gate.

"No, you moron, of course not." Kurotsuchi Mayuri walked with them. "There is a dangerous part-hollow somewhere nearby, a substitute shinigami with an overlarge sword, and a criminal we have to retrieve. If this was safe, we would have left it to Rangiku-fukutaicho and Gin-taicho."

"Kurotsuchi is right," came the icy voice of Kuchiki Byakuya. "Rangiku-fukutaicho was all for taking this job so she could impress Gin-taicho, and Gin-taicho to impress Rangiku-fukutaicho." Neither of the two had said this, but everyone knew it in the backs of their minds. "If it weren't for the danger, those two would be perfect for this. As it is, we need..." his finger moved as he performed a head count.

Aizen had already done so. "Four taichou and their adjutants, not counting the two officers who have already been dispatched. And Zaraki-taicho and his fukutaicho are arriving later, as soon as they find the way to the gate."

"Why isn't Unohana-taicho here?" Hinamori had been wondering this ever since she took even the vaguest guess at how dangerous this was going to be.

"This sitation is too dangerous for healers. If anyone gets injured, we'll be using my regenerative serum."

They were all carrying their swords, and every one of them except for Aizen, the Kurotsuchi family, and Hinamori looked grim. Aizen was calm, relaxed and just about as reassuring a presence as they could have brought. The Kurotsuchi father was excited. His daughter was as emotional as ever.

And Hinamori was scared shitless. Almost literally.

"Don't worry, Hinamori." Abarai Renji's cocky voice rang out. "I can take that part-hollow myself!"

"I doubt that. Apparently the part-hollow gave Rukia and that damn ningen who got her powers a good bit of trouble before getting distracted by another opponent." Hitsugaya walked alongside Hinamori, on her right. "Don't worry. The hollow is around taichou level. If it wasn't for that damn seal, Gin might have won. The hollow isn't the problem. The problem is that the shinigami representative has enough reiatsu to scare the Central 46 as much as the part-hollow scares Hinamori."

Which Hinamori didn't find too comforting. She threw herself at Aizen and plunged her face into his stomach.

Hitsugaya's face didn't move, but he made a mental note to kick Aizen's ass as soon as he got strong enough. He couldn't think why, though.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

**xoxoxoxox flashback ends xoxoxoxox**

Ishida Ryuken stood as his opponent melted.

He fingered the hilt of his Seele Schneider.

"Don't bother. In exchange for being unable to attack in any way, I cannot be attacked in any way." Kurostuchi Mayuri's cocky voice came from the ooze.

And oh, how wrong he was there.

Ishida Ryuken could kill this damn shinigami and avenge his father easily. The question was, should he?

No, revenge against a downed opponent was pointless. Why bother? He would simply allow everyone else present to think the shinigami invulnerable in this state.

After all, this state might depend on the chain-link being intact. He'd probably killed himself with it, if that was true.

He turned to where the Death Goddess was kneeling next to her downed comrade.

With a syringe in hand.

He had no idea what was in there, but he wasn't going to wait.

He had just made up his mind to stop her when he heard it.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Shinji was right. This was a bad idea.

Kensei was only here to make sure the other three didn't get hurt. He didn't actually want to do this.

But he didn't want Inoue or Sarugaki to get hurt.

His former fukutaicho was something else again.

He'd rather die than let her get a scratch on her face...

He looked at the rooftop where the two Quincy were standing.

He watched as a shinigami melted away.

He was no threat, and neither was the shinigami taicho lying on the roof in front of the other officer.

The very familiar taicho lying in front of the other officer...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"_**ICHIMARU!!**_"

Ishida Ryuken heard the scream of rage and felt the reiatsu.

Realizing he had about a second at most, he grabbed his son and disappeared as the roof exploded under their feet.

**I finally have more reviews than chapters.**

**Keep reviewing, guys.**


	19. Heaven and Earth Come to Blows

**Come on, guys. I though I asked you to keep reviewing? Even gameroy disappointed me...**

**And no laughing at the chapter title. It isn't funny at all.  
**

Kurotsuchi Nemu was expecting to be slightly damaged when she felt the part-hollow's reiatsu. She knew that she would be very badly damaged if she allowed the part-hollow to kill Ichimaru-taicho, because it would probably come at her next. In addition, she had orders to heal Ichimaru-taicho, so even though she doubted that her father would discipline her too harshly (relative to her own body's durability, of course. Any natural daughter of his would be dead by now,) she decided to do it anyway.

What she wasn't expecting was to be saved that slight damage by Ichimaru-taicho.

So she was slightly surprised when he pulled her clear of the rooftop right as the two Quincy escaped.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Ichimaru-taicho!" Gin looked down. There was Izuru Kira, standing on the ground, awaiting orders.

"Hey, Kira! What're you doin' here?"

"New orders from Central 46." The one currently talking was Aizen, and two other captains. Shit must have really gotten fucked up. Was getting the Orb still possible under these conditions? If so, things would get fun quickly. "We're your backup."

"I don' need backup, Aizen."

Hitsugaya was standing beside Aizen with his sword drawn. "We got word you got the floor mopped with you by a part-hollow who was around captain level. We never heard that he was a former captain, though."

As if on cue, Muruguma Kensei jumped at Gin. Aizen apppeared and raised his zanpakuto to block the blade.

"Incidentally, you have permission to remove your seal." Aizen smiled a little bit as Gin swiped his hand over his chest. The insignia blocking his power disappeared.

"That's better."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Matsumoto Rangiku lay on the floor of the classroom. She wasn't injured, per se, but the bakudo Ichigo had put on her arms meant she wasn't going to be joining the fight outside the school building. Hell, she was tied up so good, she wouldn't even be getting out of her gigai.

"Are you okay, Matsumoto-san?" He pretended to look concerned.

"No, obviously not!"

"Gee, I'm sorry. I'll take you to the nurse, maybe she can help.

"Fuck you."

"Wow, Matsumoto-san. What's your problem?"

"The only one of my classmates who knows, and you're the one who asks? I hate high school students!"

"What, I don't get it? What's wrong?" Ichigo pretended to look puzzled.

"Isn't it obvious Ichigo? With an illness as serious and mysterious as the one my dear, beloved Rangiku-chan has, your bumbling masculine hands will only make her worse, Kurosaki-kun! Only a beautiful and loving woman like me can properly escort Rangi..."

"Could you please take me to the nurse's office, Kurosaki-kun?"

"My pleasure, Matsumoto-san."

Ichigo carried Matsumoto-san into the hallway. He had to, because the spell on Matsumoto's arms also restricted leg movement, the way it had restricted his the night he met Rukia.

Of course, he was able to overcome the spell easily. Rangiku might never be able to move her arms again...

Ichigo could only do one bakudo, but damn if anyone under sotaichou level was getting free of it!

"Seeya later." Ichigo popped the gikongan into his mouth.

"Hello. I am a gikongan, Master Ichigo." Ichigo's body saluted his soul. "I will be taking care of your body while you are fighting."

"Glad to hear it. And make sure to watch the prisoner. Taking her to the nurse should avert suspicion, but in order to be safe and make sure she doesn't break the spell, you'll have to personally supervise her. Try telling the nurse you want to make sure your classmate is okay. That'll probably get you authorized to stay, with a nurse as lenient as ours."

"Got it." Ichigo leapt away as the gikongan picked up the prisoner.

The gikongan gave her a lecherous look. "I hope the nurse leaves us alone together..."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Ichigo stepped outside of the building and took in the situation.

There seemed to be four fukutaicho and two taicho standing in front of him. There was a battle going on nearby, but his senses weren't that good and he couldn't tell the specifics. It seemed as if there were four or five captains fighting a particularly dangerous hollow on the roof...

"Hey."

A blonde girl in a jogging suit, a weird chick with a green pudding bowl haircut, and a very familiar looking someone else dropped from the sky to land beside him.

"So, this the guy you were talkin' about, Sora?" Judging by the blonde girl's voice, she was probably the one who had greeted him.

"Yeah, he's the one. Hi, sorry about..."

"I remember you, you hollow bastard. Give me one good reason not to gut you."

"Uh... I got my sanity back, and now I'm on your side?"

"I don't believe you on that one."

"I'm your friend's sister?"

...

... "Okay, I'll let you live for now."

**Seriously though. Please keep reviewing. With this addition, my number of chapters has caught up to my number of reviews.**

**And "come to blows" isn't funny.**


	20. The Blows Keep Coming

Inoue Orihime felt distinctly... odd.

It was as though there was some strange conflict going on in her soul, or perhaps some strange conflict between otherworldly forces, that she could feel in her soul...

Should she say something? No, of course not...

Where had Ishida Uryu gone?

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Okay, Kurosaki. What's the plan?" Sora had drawn his swords the moment he was sure Kurosaki would not take it as a threat. Everyone else on both sides who had not already done so (Hiyori, Kurosaki, and the two taicho on the ground had theirs in their hands) followed suit quickly.

"Plan?"

"Yes, I said plan. You didn't come here without one, did you?" Sora was amazed that his sister could be such close friends with such a moron.

"You weren't planning to make it up as you went along, were you?" Hiyori smiled. "My favorite kind. I could get to like you."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"IKOROSE, SHINSO!!"

Kensei dodged the blade as it shot outwards. "Otoribashi-taicho would be disappointed to know his old command is in such pathetic hands!"

He jumped forward to slice the disgrace to his friend's former position, but Aizen appeared again to block the blade.

"I would have expected better. I'm almost glad you turned out to be a heartless traitor. Tousen is far better suited for your old position than you are." Aizen was calm on the outside, but he was secretly reveling in what he was able to say to this fool.

"Maybe, but there's one thing you're forgetting."

"That would be?" Aizen already knew what he was supposedly forgetting.

"I'm not using my shikai yet."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

The first to attack was the blond man with the glum look on his face.

"OMOTE O AGERO, WABISUKE!!"

"BAKUDO: NUMBER ONE... RESTRAIN!!"

The blonde's hands shot behind his back as he fell onto his knees.

Now, he was looking apologetic.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Ichimaru Gin and Aizen Sosuke fell out of the sky as the explosion of reiatsu hit them.

Aizen landed on his feet, Ichimaru on his face.

Aizen thrust out his sword and turned it in midair. A gate appeared, as though Aizen's blade had been the key that unlocked it.

"Ichimaru-taicho."

"Yea, Aizen?"

"I need you to go back to Seireitei for re-enforcements. There is no way we can fight this creature, even together."

_What? What the... he and I are just about even, why is he..._

_Of course. An excuse to get rid of Ichimaru, so I can't hurt him... and maybe an excuse to look like he thought he might lose... He's planning to use... that..._

_I have to kill him before he can do it!!_

"_**BANKAI!!"**_

**Please keep reviewing.**


	21. In Hueco Mundo

"Narakumaru Tachikaze."

Gin looked Kensei up and down.

"Uh... where?"

Kensei shunpoed forward.

Aizen pushed Gin into the senkaimon before jumping sideways, away from Kensei's bankai.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Is everything ready?" the Fifth Espada called. "I'm going to be in trouble if you guys do anything stupid."

"Yeah, since about two hours ago, you bitch." A praying mantis looking adujchas stood at the edge of the closed portal. "We got this, don't worry. We're not like you women, who can't do shit right."

The Espada narrowed her eyes. "If you don't refer to my by my rank, you will call me 'Cirucci Thunderwitch-sama. Not 'you bitch.' Is that clear, adjuchas?"

"How about you call me 'Nnoitra Jiruga-sama,' bitch?"

"How about you shut up before I personally feed you to the Primero?"

"How about you stop going wrestling while wearing his loincloth?"

It was a miracle Cirucci stopped herself from releasing her weapon right there and then.

"I never said I wouldn't kill you before he eats you. I don't need his help to deal with a weakling like you, it would just be a shame to waste your abilities. With some Espada level reiatsu behind them, they might be worth having around."

"As it is, even the weakest of us Espada would have no trouble."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"_**ACHOO!"**_

"What's wrong, Ricardo Diaz-sama?"

"Nothing, Menoly. Don't worry about it."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

A bankai powered by a vizard's hollow abilities.

Aizen knew he should have released his sword there and then, but he couldn't.

He had to see what Kensei could do.

He glanced at the knockout ring on Kensei's right hand.

And immediately dodged to the right as Kensei moved forward, trying to send that knockout ring into Aizen's left eye.

He immediately placed his back against the wall of a building. Kensei's bankai was most powerful after hitting something. He had to give it a target to strike if he wanted to see the attack's full power.

Kensei came forward, Aizen dodged.

Realizing that a building was about to get demolished, Kensei just barely stopped his hand in time.


	22. The First And The Fifth

"I hope you're enjoying our time together, Matsumoto-chan..." What appeared to be Ichigo was clearly enjoying itself as it ran it's master's fingers through Matsumoto-fukutaicho's hair.

Matsumoto wasn't so much, however.

"Get the fuck away from me, you damn jawbreaker."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Aaroniero Arruruerie was one privileged son of a bitch.

Not only was he the only truly shinigamified hollow, the only one who could use a true zanpakuto, and almost certainly the only hollow who would ever know shit about demon path spells, he was the most powerful hollow in Aizen-sama's army.

No, fuck that.

There was no way he was anything less than the most powerful non-vasto lorde class hollow in the world.

He was about to burst into an evil laugh when a knock at the door disturbed him in his... not glee, but close to happiness, or maybe grim satisfaction.

"Yeah?"

Cirucii Thunderwitch opened the door. Aaroniero stepped away from it to avoid the light touching him. He liked this Shiba idiot's face better than either of his natural ones.

"Yammy's group is set up in case Aizen-sama needs some help. And if the adjuchas named Nnoitra Jiruga survives this, I ask your permission to kill him in retribution for the way he spoke to me."

"On the understanding that you will be allowed to consume him and add his abilities to Glotoneria's, of course."

"If he survives, that is." Aaroniero reminded her. "Frankly, if Aizen-sama needs help, even I'd probably be killed by whatever he's fighting."

"That's why he's not sending us. Ultimately, if he needs a sacrifice, we'll do, but only if he can't sacrifice anyone less powerful than we are." Cirucci sighed. "Yammy and Nnoitra are powerful, but if you had to rank them, you'd have to call them and anyone else who hasn't removed their masks yet pawns. If he has to sacrifice someone, they're first on the list."

"Then, if the enemy is too powerful for that to make a difference, he'll send weak arrancar like Demora and Iceringer, with about the reluctance of a chess player sending a rook to its death. Then, if it gets too bad, he might sacrifice Diaz or another lesser Espada, the way one would kill a knight." Aaroniero nodded.

"Sacrificing you, Kaname, or Gin would be a very desperate move. You three would be the queens."

"I'M NOT A QUEEN! I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THEM, BUT I DON'T BEND THAT WAY!!"

Cirucci raised her hands in a placating gesture. "Sorry, sorry, sorry, didn't mean it that way..."

The gesture worked. Cirucci continued with "It's just weird that he'd arrange to put Nnoitra and Yammy in harm's way if he wasn't sure it was necessary. I hadn't met either of them before today, but I'd heard of their abilities. They are the two most powerful hollows here, other than the arrancar."

"Yeah, well, Aizen-sama called them apart and told them this was a suicide mission. The other hollows are gonna keep fighting, sure that Aizen-sama will save them. They're in for a disappointment."

"Nnoitra and Yammy are different, though." he continued. "Aizen-sama gave them permission to ditch when things got too hairy. He made sure to emphasize the word "when," so that they knew he meant they couldn't survive. Stupid morons are probably going to try and prove him wrong, and I know for a fact that Aizen-sama knows it..."

"Wait, they have permission to leave? Why is that?"

"The only reason those two are weaker than we are is because they still have their masks. As soon as Aizen-sama removes said masks with the orb, he'll probably make them Espada..."

"WHAT!?"

"Didn't you know?"

"I... I..."

"Yeah. We'll all be demoted, unless I do something..."

"What? What can you do? You can keep us as the Espada?"

"Not us, me. At the demotion ceremony, Aizen-sama will restrain all nine of you guys with a high seventies level binding spell. I'll be allowed to pick however many I want, whether it's none or even all of you, to kill with Glotoneria. The rest will be demoted, and I'll be re-evaluated to see how many ranks I drop." He sighed. "According to Aizen-sama, there is no chance that I will be as powerful as the new Espada, unless I kill at least one of you. Luckily, the line between my power and theirs is probably going to be so thin, that if I only kill Diaz, I can keep my job."

"Well, not really. He says that, if I even want a chance to stay the Primero Espada, I'll have to eat all of you..."

He put a finger on Cirucci's cheek, and started slowly moving his lips closer to hers. "So you better do something to make me real happy..."

Cirucci slapped him as hard as she could and stormed out the door, deliberately leaving it open to let the light shine in.

Aaroniero sonido-ed out of the area directly behind said door, and closed it, making sure not to get shone on.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

_THE NERVE OF THAT AARONIERO BASTARD! TO SOIL MY BEAUTIFUL FACE WITH HIS DISGUSTING FINGERS! TO BRING HIS DISGUSTING FACE CLOSE TO MY LIPS! TO EVEN SUGGEST THAT I'D GET DEMOTED! TO EVEN SUGGEST THAT HE'D BE ALLOWED TO EAT MY PERFECT BODY! IF SUNLIGHT IS HIS WEAKNESS, I HOPE HE GETS TOSSED INTO THE MIDDLE OF A SOLAR FLARE!!_

**Either you will review or you won't.**

**But Kami I hope you will.**


	23. Introductions

"Leave my friend ALONE! HOERO, ZABIMARU!!"

Ichigo and the three vizards jumped aside as the red-haired fukutaicho sent his whip-like blade shooting through the air.

Ichigo suddenly appeared in front of the red-head.

He punched the fukutaicho in the gut, knocking him to the ground. He re-appeared next to him, and put his foot on the poor man's chest. He unsheathed his blade...

"LEAVE HIM ALONE! HAJIKE, TOBIUME!"

A shot of pink light rocketed from the girl's blade. Ichigo knew that he couldn't stop that attack with his sword (without damaging the blade) or his kido (at all.) At least, not yet.

He jumped aside, leaving his opponent to get up.

"Well, unlike the blonde, you two got your teamwork down," the vizard in the red jogging suit said.

"I have a name, criminal. It's Izuru Kira. Fukutaicho of the Third division."

"I got one, too. It's Sarugaki Hiyori. Former fukutaicho of the Twelfth division."

"I suppose I'm your replacement, then. Kurotsuchi Nemu."

"Kuna Masahiro, at your service. Former fukutaicho of the Ninth division."

"Inoue Sora, that's me. Never had a fancy title, though."

Ichigo grinned. "Me neither. Name's Kurosaki Ichigo."

"Abarai Renji. I'm the fukutaicho of the sixth division under that self-important prick." He gestured to the older-looking taichou.

"Renji!" the girl looked shocked, then forced the emotion down. "I'm Hinamori Momo, fukutaicho of the Fifth Division. And I would never say anything like that about my taicho!"

"That's 'cause he ain't a self-important prick. Wish mine was as cool as yours." Renji muttered. (He didn't see Masahiro and Hiyori's faces darken.)

"That's insubordination, fukutaicho." the white-haired boy said. "I'm Hitsugaya Toshiro. Taicho of the Tenth Division. My fukutaicho should be around here somewhere..."

"Large chest, no brains?"

"WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER?!"

"Oh, she's okay, don't worry. Although your sotaicho will probably have to take that binding spell I used off of her ams himself. Same with Sandaime-san here, for that matter."

"Are you that powerful?" Izuru Kira was torn between being honored to have met a man as powerful as this and being frightened about the sotaicho's reaction to this request.

And more than a little relieved that he wouldn't be laughed at by the rest of the division as much. Most of them would still laugh a little, though...

And a good number of them would laugh a lot...

"And you?" Ichigo was eager to complete the introductions. It made all of his opponents seem more human, and made him think that they might be willing to stop fighting and let him talk them out of this.

Until he saw the look on the last taicho's face.

"My name is of no importance to you. I do not need those who are about to die to know my name."

Ignoring the looks of amazement and irritation, he raised his sword to attack.

"Chire, Senbonzakura."

The blade broke in his hands, leaving only a hilt.

Ichigo and Sora looked puzzled for a second. Then, they felt the reiatsu flowing through the pieces of metal in the air. They quickly jumped away to avoid serious injury.

The taicho looked unmoved, until he felt the change in Hiyori's reiatsu.

And heard a static thump and her voice from beside him. "Nice blade, if what you want is an attack. How is it for defense, though?"

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Kuchiki Byakuya-taicho paled as he turned to face her. If he had seen this coming, and known he'd need to defend himself, he'd have used his bankai.

But he hadn't.

"Hado: Number 33... Shot of Red Fire."

The spell rocketed into Byakuya's chest. As he fell unconscious, he wondered vaguely if he would ever recover fully, or get up at all.

The spell might kill him before he even hit the ground.

He wondered vaguely, for he was on the border between consciousness and unconsciousness, which he would prefer.

If he lived, he would be able to continue building the honor of his family.

If he died, he would rejoin his loved ones. He might see his parents again, when he reincarnated. He might even be able to hold his wife in his arms, to tell her he loved her...

And, even if they were all on different continents, he could stop worrying about who he loved more...

He could stop worrying about whether his parent's love of rules was more important than his wife's love of their sister...

Maybe death was better...

**I'm probably gonna get flamed for this...**

**Hey, a review is a review...**

**No matter what's in it, submit it.**


	24. Kenkun and Kenchan

"Woah. Is he okay, Sarugaki-san?" Ichigo stared at the taicho's battered shape.

"Of course he is, baka. Getting hit in the chest with a high-powered hado isn't dangerous at all." Hiyori removed her mask. It disintegrated as it left her face.

Sora looked on this with some dismay. Hachi had had to rebuild Sora's body during training at least thirty times, and she hadn't wanted to hurt or kill him in the slightest.

Or, more accurately, she hadn't wanted to kill him.

Kurotsuchi Nemu put her hand to his throat, then his wrist. Then she put her ear to his chest.

"He is dead."

She took out a syringe filled with strange green liquid.

"If I don't try this, Father will make me lie naked in the Eleventh Division's Headquarters again."

Though she really didn't understand what she wasn't supposed to like about that...

They were such friendly men, their reputations as monsters weren't deserved in the slightest...

Particularly their Fourth Seat...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"_**ACHOO!!"**_

"Bless you, Tadakatsu." Eleventh Division's Third Seat Madarame Ikkaku was leaning on a wall in Seireitei, next to Ayasegawa Yumichika.

"Thanks. Where's Zaraki-taicho? I'm supposed to be giving him backup in the living world. They thought he and the other taicho would be enough, but the local criminals just keep coming out of the woodwork..."

"I'll come too," Yumichika said.

"He left the same time everyone else did. He should have arrived fifteen minutes ago, which'll mean he's just arriving now..." Madarame said.

"I'd better hurry. You two can come if you want..."

The three of them shunpo-ed away.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"You asshole."

"I don't understand why you're calling me that. You're the traitor who gained hollow powers and who almost killed an entire building full of innocents."

"YOU SON OF A BITCH!!"

Kensei took another swing at Aizen. Aizen jumped back, and then aside, raising his sword.

"BAKUDO: NUMBER FOUR... CRAWLING ROPES!"

Aizen gaped as the spell restrained him. He looked up and into Kensei's eyes. Kensei saw the look of fear.

He sent his fist into Aizen's face.

The knockout ring that was Narakumaru Tachikze sent reiatsu into Aizen's skull, and sent a whirlwind of blood, brain, bone, and hair flying out from the "H" carved into the ruby on the end of the grey, metal ring.

"Well, that was impressive." Kensei turned around.

He didn't recognize the three subordinate shinigami, but he couldn't help but know exactly who was was standing there in the captain's jacket with the little girl on his shoulder.

"Wow! Ken-kun has really improved! But then again, so has Ken-chan!"

"Who's going to win, Ken-kun, or Ken-chan?"

**What do I have to do to get more than one review per chapter?**

**Come on, guys.**

**Note: I know I kind of crossed the line with that punishment.**

**That's why I re-rated the story.**


	25. Malfunctioning Products

"Zaraki-taicho," Kensei spoke in the most assured voice he could muster, "I have no grudge against you..."

"Well, I got a grudge against you... YOU DIDN'T WAIT TILL I SHOWED UP TO START THE FIGHTING!" Zaraki charged.

"YOU'RE DEAD!"

"Bakudo Number 81... SPLITTING VOID!"

Zaraki's blade slammed into a wall.

Kensei looked to his left and saw Tsukabishi Tessai standing there...

wearing an _apron_.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Well, really sucks to be him. He still gets shots _after _he's dead."

Kurotsuchi Nemu looked up to see a man with a bucket-looking hat and wooden sandals carrying a cane.

She knew most people would think _him _as strange as they thought her father, but she really didn't care.

"Hello."

"Shouldn't you show more concern than that for a dead person's remains?"

"My father would be cross with me if I didn't do some experiments..."

Seeing that she got no results from injecting his arm, she pointed another needle directly into his heart.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"There are some things I want to get from a local shop, son." Ishida Ryuken said. "I suggest you accompany me. You are slightly stronger than the average shinigami, but that's not what you are facing here."

"WHAT!?"

"Need I repeat myself? I want to go to a shop, and you will get cut to bits by the most dangerous shinigami they have if you are not with me."

"I can take care of him, if you want."

They looked up to see a black cat sitting on a wall.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Is there any point in asking why you are here, Tsukabishi-san?"

"I'm here to save your life. Again."

"Am I fighting both of you, now? Fights are supposed to be one on one!"

"I can handle him," Tessai said as he drew a tanto from his apron.

Kensei considered it for a second.

"I'd kind of like to check on my friends, and let you fight him, if that's okay, Zaraki-taicho."

"It's not like I care who I fight. Besides, letting you check on your friends seems okay to me."

"Shouldn't you let me take him, Zaraki-taicho?" the bald-headed man asked as he walked over and exposed three inches of his blade.

"I think letting him check on his friends is the noble thing to do, but he is a criminal, so do whatever you want."

The bald man looked him over. "He's a crook?"

"Yeah, that's what Ichimaru said."

An insane grin spread over the bald man's face.

"Then I'll kick 'is ass!"

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"GAAAAAAAAASSSSSP!"

**coughcoughcoughcoughcough**

"GAAAAAAAAASSSSSP!"

"The good doctor has revived the patient."

Kurotsuchi Nemu stood over the now breathing body of Kuchiki Byakuya-taicho.

Sarugaki Hiyori was the first to regain control of her voicebox.

"Playing Kami at it's most disturbing."

"Taicho? Can you hear me?" Renji spoke with excitement. "You better come back to life so I can kick your ass!"

"Mu nu... numi... gu... samivi... da..."

"It seems he has suffered some brain damage from being dead so long."

"So inject his head!" Renji shouted impatiently.

"This serum doesn't work on brain damage," Nemu replied. "We'll need a specially made formula. This formula already exists, but I didn't think to bring any."

Renji groaned with impatience.

"Well, I think we can safely call this a defeat. Let's head back, shall we?" Kurotsuchi Nemu looked to see if anyone objected to her suggestion.

Someone did.

"It's not your place to say that, fukutaicho."

"My apologies, Hitsugaya-taicho. But my father has told me as much as I need to know about the man in the hat and clogs. I don't think we want to fight him."

"I'm not going to call this a defeat until..."

Every spiritually aware person in Karakura town got the sudden impression that the ground was shaking.

"Kid, I've already beaten you. I suggest you admit it before I vegetablize you the way my former fukutaicho vegetablized Byakuaya."

Far from weakening under this pressure, Hitsugaya Toshiro actually grew in his resolve to fight.

"Like hell I will!" he exclaimed defiantly. "I'm not abandoning my comrades!"

"These guys want to leave, you wouldn't be... oh right..."

"Well, Kurotsuchi Mayuri dissolved. He's around here somewhere. If I see him around, I'll open a garganta for him. More likely he'll simply find your senkaimon and rush through it before he closes."

"Ichimaru Gin has escaped, and is waiting for you in Seireitei.

To nobody's surprise, Kira Izuru said "You're lying."

"No I'm not. I haven't seen Matsumoto Rangiku, though..."

"Oh, she's in the nurse's office. I hit her with the same spell I hit Kira with. She's okay, though."

"You're sure?" Hitsugaya Toshiro didn't really trust this outlaw not to hurt his subordinate.

"Well, unless my gikongan did something to her, she's okay."

"**Where is it**?!"

"Jeez. I'll show you. This way."

When they arrived, they were not pleased with what they saw...

"No... stop..."

"Please... Matsumoto-chan? Can't I just touch them a little?"

The gikongan was stroking Matsumoto-fukutaicho's hair. It was obvious he was in his element.

Matsumoto looked up and saw the shinigami who had come in.

"Oh, taicho save me! He's a monster in pill form!"

Hitsugaya-taicho's lungs started working well before Ichigo's did.

"WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF GIKONGAN DID YOU USE!?"

**Why does nobody besides gameroy review my work?**

**I appreciate it, gameroy. It's not that I want you to stop reviewing, it's that I want everyone else to start following your example.**

**Oh, and by the way?**

**I didn't make up the character I'm using as the Fourth Seat in the Eleventh Division.**

**A guy named "Blak-Ninja" did.**

**And made me put him in my story...**

**under threat of death...**

**And now I'm using his character...**

**MAYBE HE CAN REVIEW TOO!**


	26. Really Strange Malfunctioning Products

Ichigo would probably have blamed Urahara Kisuke for this, but he couldn't find his voice. He decided to keep searching: it was there somewhere...

Meanwhile, the gikongan decided to run.

Fast.

Faster than Ichigo had ever thought his body capable of...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"You call that tiny thing a zanpakuto, Tsukabishi?"

"Yes. You call that blunt piece of tin a shikai, Zaraki-taicho?"

A funny thing always happened when someone insulted his blade. Whenever someone insulted his sword, Zaraki noticed his power growing a little weaker...

Like his blade blunted under criticism...

He didn't trust the thing for a second, but this was a little over the top...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"I'm going to go check on my friends, you thug. One way, or another." Kensei raised his reiatsu enhanced fist.

"Yeah, yeah. Let's just have fun..." the bald man raised his blade. "Nobiro, Houzukimaru!" He slammed his sword hilt and sheath together.

They turned into what appeared to be a wax-wood naginata.

"Oh, before we get started, my name's Madarame Ikkaku, and I'm the third seat of the Eleventh Division. You?"

Kensei grinned. "You have nice manners for a thug. I'm Muguruma Kensei. Former taicho of the Ninth Division. Now how about you get the fuck out of my way before I make you?"

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Your body runs pretty fast, Kurosaki-kun." Matsumoto said. She really didn't blame Ichigo for this.

Well, okay, yeah she did.

But she knew from the look on his face that he hadn't seen _this_ coming.

"It... never... ran that fast... for me..."

"Were you ever that scared before?" Hitsugaya _did_ blame Ichigo for this. He should have tried that gikongan out before using it in battle.

"No..."

"Maybe it's a characteristic of the gikongan. Maybe it has special abilities that it grants to your body..."

"Those were all destroyed, you moron." Hitsugaya didn't really feel like fantasizing about illegal, lost technology. There was. _No. Freaking. Way._ that Kurosaki had gotten his hands on a modsoul.

"Maybe I should ask hat-and-clogs about this..."

**Well? Was his reaction funny?**

**Please review.**

**Everyone besides Mikomimaru and Gameroy: I'm asking you guys as much as I am them. Not more, but as much.**

**You two keep doing what you are doing. Great job.**


	27. Goraishi

**I'm sorry I don't update as much anymore.**

**I'm starting _summer school_ for _trigonometry._**

**Despite the fact that, if I manage to become a _lawyer_ like I'm _planning to,_ I might on a bad day need to know _freshman ALGEBRA!_**

_**THIS IS RETARDED!**_

The modsoul jumped from building to building with ease. He _loved_ his special abilities! There were none cooler than his!

Below him, Urahara Kisuke looked up at the bounding flesh body.

_I think I need to take another look at that Soul Candy dispenser..._

"Okay, I think Matsumoto is going to be okay now..." Everyone else looked at him.

"Which means you can all go back."

"Not without Aizen-taicho! We need to..."

Without unsheathing Benihime, Urahara jammed the end of its cane-looking sheath into her stomach as hard as he could. She fell unconscious.

"What is the meaning of this?!" Kira struggled in vain to raise his sword. Ichigo's overabundance of power precluded him from using bakudo number two now, and probably would for his whole existence, but made his first level spell almost unbreakable, even at this point.

"If I told her this, she would go completely insane. We need somebody to gently break it to the poor girl."

"Told her what?" Kira still struggled. If he could even free a finger, he was going to...

"Aizen-taicho has been killed." He pretended to be grim, like it was a tragedy that would have to be mourned later, but the truth was that if he was actually dead, rather than absolutely hypnotizing everyone, he would dance, and then subsequently piss and spit, on the motherfucker's grave.

He and an assload of his friends had lost their jobs to that motherfucker...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"You're going down!" Madarame swung his weapon's shikai at Kensei.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Goraishi was pissed.

He was the most pissed being in existence.

And he couldn't do anything about it.

His idiot "master" couldn't even hear him.

How was he supposed to trust an idiot like this?

His idiot master (he knew his name, but he wasn't calling him by it as long as said master didn't know Goraishi's) thought the reason their power decreased every time someone insulted Goraishi was because he couldn't handle criticism. HA! If that fucking moron knew his name, Goraishi would handle them all without the idiot's hand even having to move...

Muguruma, Tsukabishi, they and their friends would all die painfully...

He took a deep breath...

"ZARAKI, YOU MORON! MY NAME IS GORAISHI!!

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"_**ACHOO!"**_

"Are you well, Zaraki-taicho?" Tsukabishi Tessai was worried about his enemy's health, for some stupid reason...

"Don't worry about me..."

He charged. "I'M THE ONE WHO'S GOING TO WALK AWAY FROM THIS!!"

**Please review.**


	28. In Hueco Mundo, Again

Cirucci Thunderwitch sat in her quarters and sulked. She knew deep down that she really was going to lose her job.

And Aaroniero would be demoted.

Or maybe not...

Would Aaroniero kill her?

Probably not. She was his favorite subordinate. She would probably be the sole survivor.

No, maybe not even that. He had always liked Gantenbainne too. So had she, and so did everyone else. Tousen-dono himself had said that Gantenbainne was the most likable hollow in Las Noches, in addition to being the second most powerful. He probably wouldn't be killed either.

And Dorondii. He was a likable enough hollow. Weird enough, but likable.

He would probably spare the three of them.

Would he spare anyone else?

No, probably not.

Ricardo was a paranoid son of a bitch with an annoying voice, who killed so many of his subordinates that once Aizen-sama got the Orb, he wouldn't be worth having around. Aizen was probably hoping Aaroniero would kill him. Tousen-dono said himself that he didn't like Diaz... And Gin-dono wasn't a fan...

She pulled a pillow into her arms and began to cry with rage, fear, and confusion. She knew full well she was going to lose her job, and that, whatever thoughts she tried to calm her fears with, there was a very real chance that she and the other lesser Espada wouldn't survive the ceremony...

He would probably kill her...

No, he wouldn't... channeling that Metastatica's power always made him more foolish and idealistic...

Except that Aizen-sama always ordered Aaroniero to show his true faces during offical gatherings and ceremonies...

She cried harder.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"So, Gantenbainne, what was your life like? You know, how was your existence in flesh?

"I was a fairly well-off Muslim living in Al-Andalus."

"Where?"

"It later got renamed 'Spain.'" Gantenbainne explained.

"Ah."

"Yeah. The Christians took over, and I got caught. They told me to convert, but I didn't, I'm what's left of a martyr, now."

"That sucks, man."

"Yeah. Well, Ricardo, who were you when you were human?"

An insane grin lit up Ricardo's face. "I was the richest coke smuggler in all of Florida!"

Gantenbainne looked completely unimpressed. "I was truthful with you..."

"And I'm being truthful with you. I owned the two fastest boats in the entire Atlantic Ocean, and used them to smuggle white gold from my native country into my mansion on Starfish Island. From there, I just sold it to those wannabe street thugs who operated out of Prawn Island."

"Then I got fucked up the ass by those two punks I trusted..."

Two of the souls making up his adjuchas-level body twitched, as though trying to sneeze. Ricardo smiled. He had gotten some power eating them, but most of it had come from eating that voodoo-loving bitch who that backstabber Vercetti had had killed the day before Ricardo's chain had snapped.

Ah, she had been tasty...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Yammy and Nnoitra felt the binding-spell induced twinge in their reishi-composed brains simultaneously.

They looked at each other with no humor in their eyes.

They both knew that this was no joke, and no drill.

Aizen-sama had made very clear that there would be none of either where _this_ operation was concerned.

They were to kill all of the fighters on both sides, except the Kuchiki bitch.

Every hollow in the group had memorized the features of this crucial target.

There wouldn't be a scratch on her when Aizen-sama got her, or shit would get ugly.

"Let's move!"

**Please review...**

**I assure you, this will be climatic.**

**Or at least, I'll try my best.**

**I still gotta deal with summer trig...**


	29. Heaven and Earth VS Hell

RROOOOOAAAAHHH!!

The shinigami standing in and around Karakura High, no matter which side they were on, heard the scream, and knew it meant no good.

Ichigo broke the spells on Matsumoto and Kira. He'd thought to have them broken in Soul Society, so nobody got any funny ideas, but he figured it'd be better to have them free to attack right now...

"Which of you Seireitei goons is the least powerful?" Ichigo asked.

They hesitated for a second.

Then, Nemu raised her hand. "I'm the least powerful offensively, the strongest defensively, maybe the strongest in kido. I never really trained much in sword jutsu, because my body is practically indestructible. I can do my shikai, and spells up to forty-five in both paths. I'm not good at incantation-less spells or long fights. I'm almost certainly the least powerful overall."

"Well, here." He dumped Byakuya-taicho's brain-dead body into her arms.

"Take it and run."

Nemu wasn't in the habit of even considering whether following orders was a good idea. She recognized leadership qualities in him, and decided to obey. She raised her blade, and struck the air, opening the senkaimon.

She pulled out ten syringes filled with green liquid, and handed them to Ichigo.

"Here, you'll probably need these."

As she left, the others looked around to see where the enemy was.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Shrieker was one confused hollow. At first, it was like it had been for years.

He used the boy whose soul had been pushed into the bird's body as a lure, someone got close to the boy, and Shrieker killed and ate the lured idiot.

Except that this one could be neither killed nor eaten.

He had dropped a girder on his latest would-be victim last night, and arranged for him to get hit by a motorcycle today, but the victim wasn't dead.

And now both Shrieker and the victim were in the middle of an all-out war.

The reiatsu was so thick, he could actually eat some. It must have been because of the orange-haired one, the one with the giant sword.

But Shrieker was too hungry to care, with all the reiatsu floating loose. He could actually survive just by breathing, as long as this kept up.

He started eating reiatsu.

He ate it, and ate more. It was so satisfying, he actually had his hunger sated for a time.

But he still ate, even though he wasn't hungry, because it tasted so good.

He ate until he fell unconscious.

He woke to see one of the death goddesses fleeing through a senkaimon.

And to see the others prepare for battle.

He felt the adjuchas pour through the portals.

That was when his hollow hole started to hurt.

He started eating to assuage it, but it wasn't working.

It had already become too much.

He had eaten too much reiatsu.

His soul was corroding even worse.

He could no longer assuage his suffering by eating shinigami, mortals, or loose reiatsu.

He had only one path left.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Raa ha ha ha ha ha!" the creature laughed as he stepped out of the void.

"A couple of little shinigami? Really, you have no chance against me." The gorilla-like adjuchas thumped his own chest. "I'll kill you all!"

"What's your name, hollow?" Zaraki asked as he twirled his blade in his hand.

_**MY NAME IS GORAISHI, YOU FUCKTARD! AND HIS NAME DOESN'T MATTER! JUST KILL HIM!**_ is what he should have heard but didn't.

"My name is Yammy..."

"I'm glad to hear it. I like knowing the names of the people I kill."

And with that, he raised Goraishi and slashed Yammy's skull and mask in half vertically.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"_**RA HA HA HA HA HA HA!" **_a number of adjuchas stepped through the portals.

The shinigami looked at each other.

This was going to be painful...


	30. Kensei's Escape

Sora and the other vizard touched their faces. The masks appeared.

"Let's go!" Hiyori disappeared with a static bass thump. The others (minus the still out-cold Hinamori, and Urahara, who stayed to make sure nothing happened to her) followed, with the typical shunpo sound.

The first one to kill a hollow was Hiyori. Her blade bit through a hollow's mask as the creature let out its final wail. A hollow used sonido to try and hit her in the back, but Masahiro appeared and sent her blade through the back of its head.

The other hollows charged as the vizards' allies closed the distance.

"**Hoero, Zabimaru**!"

"**Omote o Agero, Wabisuke**!"

"**Soten ni zase, Hyorinmaru!**"

"**Unare, Haineko!"**

Each shikai sliced through a hollow's mask, except for Zabimaru and Haineko, which had the range to get two each. Sora, who was about as fast as the normal shinigami, got one without releasing his blades.

There was one adjuchas left.

He looked like a many-armed praying mantis.

Renji and Matsumoto sent their blades at him.

He parried Zabimaru, but Haineko sliced him almost in half.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Zaraki's three henchman watched as he carved the gorilla-ish adjuchas's head in half.

"And that's why you don't fuck with taicho!" Madarame turned to his Division's two opponents, only to find one gone. "Where the fuck is Muguruma?!"

Miyamoto looked around. "I think he sneaked off while we were staring down the menos."

Yumichika looked around. "Most ugly."

Ikkaku found his voice, and decided to show it to everyone. _**"THE BASTARD!!"**_

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Is everyone okay?" Kensei appeared in the midst of the fight, just in time to see Nnoitra rebuild his torso.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

T-Bone stood in the middle of the fight, watching as his victims died.

He had been the center of the fray, and easily the most powerful hollow in the fight. The others couldn't even injure him.

He was a killer. He had been a killer in life, as the most powerful drug dealer in San Fierro, and it hadn't left him. He was the most powerful in the fight, and he knew he would keep his mind.

As soon as he hit adjuchas, he would find those two assholes who had filled him with bullets at that pier, and eat them.

Or, if some other hollow had gotten one or both, he'd eat them...

He felt himself growing. He drew in breath for a roar of triumph...

And died with the air still inside him, as Shrieker's jaws closed through his mask and brain.

The fact that the bat-frog hollow had his mouth full was the only thing stopping him from laughing as the never-quite menos gillian's power flowed into him.

He felt himself expand...

And the quite self aware menos grande that was Shrieker stepped away from the carnage.

**I've been away a while. Sorry about that.**

**Please review.**


	31. Ridiculously HighSpeed Regeneration

**Okay.**

**As for my writers block, I think it's Akatsuki Leader's fault.**

**Sorry about it, though.**

**Anyway, I also wrote another chapter for "If He Was Less Of A Dicksucker."**

**Though I admit that you need some suspension of disbelief to enjoy said fanfic.**

**I'll upload the Dicksucker chapter eventually.**

The assembled shinigami looked at the should-really-be-dead adjuchas.

Why the fuck wasn't it dead? They all knew what high speed regeneration was, but wasn't this a bit much?

The normal shinigami were rather confused, and wondered what to do.

Urahara was the first non-vizard to figure it out.

_We need to block his power somehow..._

The vizard knew exactly how this could happen.

Most of them sheathed their weapons, and released the reiatsu holding their masks in place.

Sora didn't.

"JINTEKI SHAKUSETU, NEO-IFRIT!"

His already short swords shrank into daggers.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"I'm gonna find that asshole." Ikkaku raised his naginata onto his shoulder and shunpoed away.

Miyamoto looked at his two superiors, and his subordinate.

"Maybe we should get him back before he runs smack into a both-worlders convention?"

"A what?" Yumichika was fairly bright, but this isn't exactly his expertise.

"Both-worlders. A hollow or shinigami who got power by adopting characteristics of the other side. Hollows who do it are called arrancar because they rip off their masks, a process which occasionally gives them enough spare power to make a zanpakuto. Shinigami are called vizard when they do it. Vizard is an old English word for mask, and shinigami both-worlders gain masks when they access their hollow powers."

"How ugly. What kind of amplification can we expect from this transformation?" I shouldn't need to tell you who asked.

"Several times over. Which gets pretty scary when you consider that all of the rogue shinigami who became both-worlders with Kensei are taicho and fukutaicho rank."

Zaraki already knew this, as he'd just started his career when they had been sentenced to death, and somehow escaped. Yachiru would have been frightened, except that she was beyond all fear when sitting in her favorite perch.

The first to react was Yumichika. "Let's go make sure this is a nice, clean, one on one fight."

Miyamoto wasn't really sure that was a good idea, being more inclined to prevent the fight, or to join on his friend's side, but he knew how his comrades' minds worked, and decided not to argue.

He glanced at Tessai. "I believe I will accompany you, to make sure that is what you actually do."

They shunpo-ed over, to find Ikkaku unconscious next to a girl they recognized as Aizen's fukutaicho.

"Jeez, and I'd already taken my mask off. I can't believe this prick made me put it back on."

The girl complaining had a horned mask, and blonde hair. She was wearing a red jogging suit.

Her blade was in it's sheath. Apparently, being able to use both sides power put her in a position where she was able to punch a taicho in the gut and have his ass go down in one.

A normal third-seat would probably be dead from that sort of shot.

The Eleventh Division shinigami took out their swords.

"Oh, come on. Do I have to fight you guys, too?"

"Them, no. Me, YES!!"

Zaraki charged. Hiyori appeared behind him with a bass thump.

"Oh, come on. I didn't kill the idiot, you can have him back if you want him."

"Thanks. But I still want to fight you!"

**YOU DAMN IDIOT! YOU HAVE NO REASON TO KILL HER! HOW ABOUT YOU TAKE OUT THAT DAMN ADJUCHAS RIGHT OVER THERE?! PUT YOUR DAMN BLOODLUST TO USE!**

Zaraki probably would have ignored him, except he couldn't hear him well enough.

Sora was starting to get interested in the fight.

Big mistake.

"OVER HERE, DUMBASS!"

Sora barely avoided the scythe-like blade aimed at his cerebrum.

He raised the green bladed dagger over his head, and grazed the weird mantis creature's arm.


	32. The Left Eye Opens

"EYAAAAHHHHH!" Nnoitra jumped back, screaming.

He looked in horror at the wound.

The cut itself wasn't much. It was a nick on his hand. He'd survived worse in his flesh body. It was the way the cut was healing.

Namely, it wasn't.

If anything, it was starting to rot.

"AH AH AH AH AH AH AH! You underhanded, poisoning motherfucker!"

Now Hiyori was the one to get distracted.

"OVER HERE!" She saw the blade coming at her chest, and was just barely able to limbo under it.

Zaraki's smile turned to a look of shock as he felt a storm of reiatsu come from just behind him.

Urahara Kisuke was standing behind him, with a sealed blade in hand.

Though he wasn't for long.

"_**Bankai."**_

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Zaraki felt the reiatsu flow over him and through him.

Take the best hit of heroin you've ever had, multiply it by a thousand, and you're still nowhere near the high Zaraki felt at facing such an opponent.

It overwhelmed him.

One second began to feel like five, then ten, then sixty.

Soon, he was lost in his own head.

And staring at what looked like the Terminator, except taller, longer haired, black haired, bulkier, and with a hint of feral intelligence to him. It was obvious that this man could be a frontline soldier and a five-star general simultaneously.

He was wearing what looked like a Jesuit cassock, except it was black.

"Hey, dumbass."

Zaraki was too high to want to kill him for that.

"I have a name."

"So do I."

"Mine's Zaraki. What's yours?"

"x!"

"Wow. I must be loopy. Hehahahahaha!" He was starting to slur his words.

"Yeah, I think so. But you can't hear my damn name anyway."

Zaraki would have gotten this right off in his right mind. He was insane and single-minded, but he was still very perceptive, and somewhat bright.

As it was, it took him thirty seconds to realize.

"You're my sword! Hehehahahahaha! Oh, man, I wanted to see how badass you were for years!"

"Yeah, well, if you're disappointed, I suppose I can always kick your bitch ass."

"Nah, nah, nah. I'm good. Hehahahahaha!"

"Oh well, sooner or later you're going to have to go back. Let's hope by then, you can hear my name. It's x!, by the way."

"Nope, keep trying."

"This is serious. If you go out there with just the shadow of my power you're wielding now, you'll be dead before you can even think the word 'fun'."

"You mean, if I hear it, I really can gain bankai?"

The blade looked at him like he was an idiot. "Of course not. You're a good bit away from getting that. Until you learn my name, you can't even use most of the power of my shikai."

Zaraki looked at him. "I'm not using your shikai?"

"Not all of it. Not even most of it. Hell, not even a third or quarter. You're still well below what you could be right now, if you could just hear my name."

Now, Zaraki's brain wasn't really working right. But the thought of increasing his power four-fold was something he could have have appreciated in an alpha coma.

Zaraki smiled. "Let's hear it again."

There was something different in the swordsman's face this time.

His new friend saw it, and smiled.

"Goraishi."

Zaraki smiled. He would be invincible now.

He repeated what he had heard. _**"GORAISHI!!"**_

Back in the world outside Zaraki, his eyepatch exploded on his face. Zaraki opened his eye and smiled.

**Please review.**


	33. Three Transformed Weirdos

Kusajichi Yachiru looked into her sort-of-father's face as he got high off of anticipation.

Eleventh Division shinigami live for the fight and for the high they get from it. There is no way in hell any high from anything made out of plant matter is coming close to what they feel fighting for their lives.

The exceptions were their fukutaicho and fourth seat.

They both enjoyed a fight, but they didn't go insane during said fight, they wouldn't refuse help except when they thought it unneccesary or counter-productive, (not that Yachiru ever used any words that big) and they certainly had no interest in risking their lives unless absolutely neccesary.

And more to the point, there was one thing Yachiru very much preferred to fighting.

That was, of course, watching Zaraki fight.

She looked into her adopted father's eye, and saw the anticipation there.

Then she heard his voice shout one word.

"GORAISHI!"

His eye patch exploded.

And an instant later, she thought she had too.

**_xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox_**

Miyamoto Tadakatsu stood and watched as his taicho swung his blade.

He then saw him nearly kill one of the criminals.

He then felt the amazing reiatsu come of one of the others.

He felt fear for his taicho's life threaten to take over as he realized Zaraki's error...

The girl was formerly Urahara Kisuke's fukutaicho.

And Urarhara had just seen Zaraki almost kill her.

**"Bankai."**

Hearing that single word was enough that he almost panicked. If he didn't know full well taicho would tear him apart if he tried to intervene, he would have sent his zanpakuto's full power at Urahara.

He still felt safer still holding his sword, just in case Urahara wasn't content wasting Zaraki.

He kept his blade's release command on the tip of his tongue. Wasting time in a fight against a legend is not bright.

That's when he heard Zaraki's voice.

**_"GORAISHI!"_**

A wave of yellow light rose to accompany the crimson energy flowing from... Benihime, was it? No, it would probably have another name in bankai form...

He was distracted from this line of speculation when an explosion of pink light shot from Zaraki's shoulder.

When he was able to see again, he looked, hoping against hope to see an intact fukutaicho.

He was very relived to see her unhurt, though vaugely concerned to see pink flames erupting from her left arm.

It took him a second to see that she was wearing some sort of weird armor on her arm, and that the flames were coming from that.

And another second to realize that her reiatsu now felt more hollow than shinigami.

**"Gata Izquierda del Fuego."**

Urahara was carrying an elegant katana with a jewel encrusted guard and a handle that did not resemble any part of a cane.

It had a gold tassel, probably real gold too, spun into thread.

He was wearing a variation on the standard shinigami uniform, with all the parts that should have been black instead being blood-red. The undergarment and socks were bright pink.

**"Reina del Sangre."**

Zaraki's outfit was unchanged, but his weapon was really looking weird.

It now had two curved blades on either side of the main sword blade. The main blade stuck straight up.

Zaraki held the blade with the sharp edges towards himself for a second.

Urahara looked bewildered.

Seeing this, Zaraki raised a hand and gave him the bird.

It was only then that the onlookers realized that the blade was designed in the image of a hand doing guess what.

A rather unamused Urahara raised his relatively small bankai.

"Nake, Benihime."

**I was about to ask for Miyamoto's stats again, but then I found them on my bedroom floor.**

**And my last name is spelled "Waugh," incidentally.**

**Please review.**


	34. The Terrifiying Blade of The Shinigami

The pink flames rose and blocked the crimson burst.

"You didn't have to do that, Yachiru." His annoyed tone of voice made it clear that he would have killed anyone else for that offense.

"Sorry, Ken-chan. I just wanted to test my new power." She gave a sadisticly playful grin. "I know you do too, so I won't keep you."

She leaped off his shoulder and started checking to see Madarame's injuries. Satisfied that he'd be able to fight again, she turned to watch the end of the fight against the adjuchas. She knew it would probably be over before Ken-chan could raise his blade, so no harm, right?

And she was right. The distracted adjuchas left himself open to a stab into an intact arm by both edges of the green dagger. The arm began to melt.

The vizard took advantage of the further distraction by jumping at the opening left by the liquid limb. He thrust the dagger as deeply as it would go into the hollow's torso, which began to melt in half.

As soon as he began his death-twitch, Yachiru looked towards Ken-chan's fight with Urahara.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

_Don't even think about trying to attack him head on. He's way too powerful for that, even with our new power._

_What?! How else do you want me to attack?!_

_I want you to suggest moving the fight up into the sky. For one thing, all the reiatsu you just released saying my name (less however much Yachiru's body was able to soak up) will still be in the sky. We'll be able to use it later. Also, your new power doesn't pose much of a threat to Urahara without my guidance, but it sure can fuck up all the innocent schoolkids we're fighting near._

Now Zaraki had no qualms about killing in battle.

(The same way lawyers have no qualms about billing clients, George "Dubya" Bush had no qualms about lying, or Urahara had no qualms about being an asshat. In other words, he lived to frag people.)

But he didn't like hurting innocents. He even asked Unohana to set aside twenty-five of her subordinates to keep tabs on him, and evac every potential victim of his uncontrolled rages before he arrived to fight. Unohana, it transpired, had been about to ask his permission to set aside thirty of them for the same task. The cleanup from the buildings was bad enough: she didn't want to have to clean up blood and brain.

"You know, Urahara, unless we move somewhere else, we run the risk of hurting innocent people."

"Like you care, asshole. But sure, let's go."

They disappeared, and reappeared a half-mile up.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Yayy!"

Yuzu watched as her sister sent a soccer ball shooting past the opposing teams goalie.

There was a half second left on the clock when it hit. She had done it.

She rushed off the field to embrace her sister.

Karin put out an arm and stopped her.

"Did you hear that?"

"Hear what?"

Karin looked to her left and screamed in terror. She began slowly backing away.

"Karin? Is it a ghost?"

She took off and ran.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

**ROOOAAAAAAAR!**

Rukia watched as an adjuchas attempted to attack a little black-haired girl.

She shunpo-ed down and slashed it.

The girl screamed.

"It's okay."

The girl began backing away.

"I'm not going to hurt you."

The hand she held out to the girl had blood on it.

"Karin? Is it a ghost?"

The girl ran.

**Yeah, Blak-Ninja got impatient about the next chapter.**

**Hey, I'm doing better than the dude who wrote "The Strawberry and The Fishcake," right?**

**Please review.**


	35. In Hueco Mundo, Yet Again

"So, when'd you learn that piece of tin's name, Zaraki?" Urahara held his rather smallish bankai in both hands as he looked warily at Zaraki's rather large sword.

"When you let out your bankai."

Urahara let this information sink in. He shrugged.

"Well, I should be more or less okay, then."

Zaraki's smile touched his ears. "No you won't!"

He and Urahara swung their blades down. When the edges met, a storm of reiatsu rent the air.

The shinigami on the ground felt the immense energy, even where they were.

The ones with understanding of mortal transportation technology all shared one thought:

Any jets going over Karakura during this fight were going to have a rough time of it.

**_xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo_**

The mindless grande-level menos started tramping around the forest, looking around for the Ashido fool they were ordered to kill.

Quite unaware of a far more immediate danger.

ROOAAAAAAHHHHH!!

In his head, Shrieker once again started counting off the menos grande he was killing.

Sixty four, sixty five, sixty six.

Yes, he could feel his power growing...

Sixty seven, Sixty eight.

He paused as he saw another sentient grande.

This one's mask had two curved horns that made it look quite likely he'd resemble a ram if he ever shrank.

Shrieker gave a little bow.

The ram hollow gave what hollows considered a smile: a slighty friendlier tone to their evil aura that occasionally defused confrontations between hollows, though never if the hollow smiling looked tasty enough to be worth the effort of killing.

This ram didn't however, so each turned to their right.

Shrieker sank his teeth into another grande.

**_xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo_**

"Hey, Cirucci, baby!"

"Get away from me, you walking sweat gland." Cirruci tightened her grip on Golondrina.

"Hey, come on, am I that bad?"

"You can't even look at one of your short-skirt loving fraccion without trying to bang her, now me?"

"That's a completely unfounded accusation. Me, bang a fraccion?"

"You do it all the time, Ricardo-sama." Loly blushed a little at the thought of his slightly above average member getting shoved into her again.

"I dunno what she's talking about..."

"Wanna get up that skirt, eh Ricardo? Good luck, I've been trying since before you even turned into a hollow." They all turned to see what looked like Shiba Kaien laughing good naturedly.

"Hey, I had to try, right? El Burro movies won't keep me satisfied forever, right?"

Aaroniero smiled. "Speaking of which: can I borrow 'Donkey does Dallas' again?"

"If you like it so much, keep it. I prefer his other works anyway."

"Thanks." Aaroniero walked slowly up to Cirruci, put his arms around her, and moved his lips till they were almost touching her ear. She was really creeped out, and it only got worse when she heard him whisper one sentence:

"After the demotion ceremony, I'll get his entire collection..."

**Come to think of it, we only ever did meet three Privaron Espada...**

**Maybe...**

**Anyway, please review.**


	36. A Strange, New Ailment

**I'm glad I re-rated early. This is pushing the limit. It's almost a lemon.**

**(And no, I won't, you sick motherfuckers.)**

"Thank you, Rin-san. Yes, this is what I needed." Kurotsuchi Nemu raised the syringe.

"Please turn him over onto his side. I need to inject this into his spine." Rin cringed as he turned Kuchiki Byakuya-taicho onto his side. _If this goes wrong, I might get killed._

The fukutaicho raised the syrine and pressed into into Byakuya's spine. She slowly emptied the contents into his nerves...

A sudden storm of reiatsu spun violently through the air. Nemu was not powerful for a fukutaicho in terms of overall ability, but she could block an uncontrolled blast of energy fairly well, even from someone of Byakuya's power, before it could do too much damage.

Rin was not so lucky, and got blasted.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Are you all right Rin-san?"

Rin looked up at his relatively kind fukutaicho...

And immediately passed out from blood loss.

His superior examined him gingerly...

"Nasal hemorrhages. I need to get him some help."

She looked down at the remnants of her outfit.

"After that, I need a new uniform."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

As soon as she arrived, she observed their third seat having similar symptoms.

"Iemura-san? Are you well?"

There was no response.

"I should take them both to Kotestu-fukutaicho or Unohana-taicho."

She found the fukutaicho first.

"Kotestu-fukutaicho?"

Kotetsu turned. She uttered a short scream. She quickly stifled it, and just couldn't speak anymore. She started blushing, and simply stared at Nemu's exposed chest.

"Kotestsu-fukutaicho?" Nemu stepped closer. "Are you well?"

Kotetsu started having what looked like a panic attack. "NO! STAY BACK!!"

Nemu did the opposite. "Do you have a fever?" She put her hand on her friend's forehead...

"NO!! GO AWAY!"

"Kotetsu-fukutaicho? Aren't we... friends?"

"NOT THAT KIND OF FRIENDS!" Kotetsu ran out of the room full tilt, with a face redder than Renji's head.

"Apparently, women have different symptoms." She turned to find Unohana.

She did a minute later.

"Unohana-taicho? I think there is a new disease spreading around Seireitei."

The older woman turned. "Shouldn't you bring this up with... what happened to your outfit?"

"It is unimportant, I will replace it later."

"Hm. Is it a male exclusive disease with nosebleeds as the main symptom, and some occasional fainting?"

"No. All of the males have fainted. Kotetsu-fukutaicho seems to be infected too, though she has different symptoms. She hasn't bled or fainted. Her face turned red, though."

_Oh, that will be quite simple to treat. I hope whoever taught Nemu-chan sex-ed gets fired._

"Do you wish for me to search for Kotetsu-fukutaicho before she infects someone else?"

"No. I wish for you to go back to your division and get a new outfit. I'll explain later."

"I can understand a quick explanation."

Unohana sighed. "Okay. Men and women have these things in them called hormones..."

"My father did not place many inside me, but I know the theory."

"Okay. Does it follow from what you know that the sight of your exposed breasts would overload the typical man with hormones?"

"That's all the disease is? Then I'm afraid I owe you an apology."

"How so?"

"The victims should recover without your intervention. Thus, I have wasted your time."

"Don't worry about it."

"But..."

"It isn't your fault. Here." She took off her white haori and handed it to Nemu. "Wear this to cover yourself until you get a new outfit."

"Thank you."

She left the office at her usual unhurried pace.

"Oh, Kami. Isane-chan is going to be panicking over this."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

When Nemu got back to her and her father's room, she saw that nobody was there except the comatose Kuchiki-taicho, who she had left there on her bed until he was stable enough to be moved to Fourth Division.

Thinking it safe, she removed the borrowed haori. She didn't realize that he was awake until she actually looked at his eyes.

He gave her one quick look, and his face didn't move at all.

"It's not working, Nemu-fukutaicho. Now kindly put them away."

**I'm the best, and I know.**

**Please review telling me so.**


	37. Byakuya Plays With His Tiny Sword

Kuchiki Byakuya closed his eyes while Kurotsuchi Nemu removed her destroyed outfit and replaced it.

"Father will not be pleased that I was careless."

"Will he at least be pleased that you've managed to perform an abomination unto Kami that even he hasn't yet attempted?"

"He has attempted it, though not with so new a subject as you were. He's never gotten a corpse newer than a week old."

"Hm. Well, I cannot see myself volunteering one, nor would most other taicho. And of course, he wouldn't have gotten many volunteers from 12th division, because they so rarely see action."

"That was a problem, yes. I need to return this haori to Unohana-taicho."

"She allowed you to borrow it? That is illegal..."

"She thought it was a less serious offense than indecent exposure. Particularly with the reactions I've elicited."

Byakuya pictured his entire division passed out with blood-drained brains and silently agreed.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Okay, Kotetsu... it's nothing... you're straight... just keeping telling yourself you're..."

There was a knock on her door...

"GO AWAY, NEMU!"

"She left." Unohana's calmly voice responded. "May I speak with you?"

Kotetsu gulped. "O... Okay..."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox Fifty Minutes Of Motherly Advice Later xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Are you going to be okay, Kotetsu-san?"

"Ye... Yes, taicho. I think I'll be okay."

There was a knock at the door.

"Yes, who is it?" Unohana asked.

"So, you are in there? I need to return this," Guess-who said emotionlessly.

It took about a minute for Nemu to return the haori.

And a couple of hours for Kotestu to come out from under her bed.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Akon looked over his new charge, without too much enthusiasm. He never really liked nobles much, and this guy exemplified all of the qualities he figured all of them were bound to have in some quantity.

He'd never had a sister, but if he did, he'd be damned before he'd help arrest her. He knew that much about himself.

"Well, are you ready to be moved to Fourth Division?"

"No. I'm ready to be moved to Kuchiki Manor."

Thank Kami Akon had thought to buy some sedative from Fourth Division.

It wasn't the best they had, or even a close second, but he couldn't afford the best shit, and it might kill Kuchiki in his weakened condition.

This one, however, he could use without fear.

Or so he thought.

"Is that a sedative, peasant?"

Akon's look of shock at Kuchiki being aware enough to realize the danger was probably all the confirmation Kuchiki needed, but he felt like being absolutely sure.

"I asked you a question."

"No, no. It's something to help the other injection work to heal you." This was hardly a believable lie, and the the slightly panicked tone with which he said it, while giving a terrified look to something sharp that was in Kuchiki's reach, was as good as a confession anyway.

Kuchiki raised Senbonzakura, which his captors had rather foolishly left by his bedside, and sliced the syringe.

"That came out of my paycheck!"

"I do not care."

Kuchiki got up to leave, looking around for anything else he might need.

He saw his uniform, and picked it up. It was a damn sight nicer than that hospital gown he'd been wearing, and he planned on ducking into the nearest bathroom and changing into it.

He then glanced down at his faithful Senbonzakura...

And felt a moment of trepidation.

His faithful zanpakuto was a full six inches shorter.

He brought it out of his sheath, and concentrated on expanding it.

He pulled it off, but wasn't really impressed.

Senbonzakura's old size seemed to be so... weak.

He tried and tried, but for some reason, he could only get to his old spirit pressure using the new size.

Reaching a bathroom, he put down his uniform and started to concentrate on his blade. He looked at the old size, and then switched to the old spirit pressure.

He let his powers alternate between these two for about five minutes...

Then it hit him.

His old zanpakuto _did_ have it's old spirit pressure.

The new size was a sign of improved control, and improved power.

He couldn't help but wonder what other kind of changes he would undergo.

As he thought, he had an idea.

Maybe...

Maybe the reason he couldn't do the Black Coffin spell he'd set his sights on for so long, was because of sub-par control. (Relative to the control needed for the spell of course.)

This should be interesting...

**As if he wasn't powerful enough, huh?**

**Sorry, but I couldn't resurrect him from brain death without putting some kind of side effect.**

**Please review.**

**Gameroy, and everyone else, too.**


	38. Toshiro Basically Being a Jackass

_I think now would be a great time for me to tell you my main power._

_You have a special power? I'm a KIDO-TYPE now!?_

_No. This is technically still a direct-attack type release._

_I don't care about technicalities. Tell me and let me judge._

_Okay, my main power is a lightning type ability..._

_No shit._

_..._

_Sorry._

_The blade can absorb electrons._

_..._

_What? You got something to say, you spiky haired jackass?_

_That's sounding really kido-type._

_Do you know what an electron is?_

_Something that powers my radio. Beyond that, I don't care._

_Okay, long story short, it stores these up when you fight, until you let them out._

_What happens then?_

_They use your target as a path to get back into the environment._

_..._

_..._

_..._

_Unless that's really painful, you're a kido type._

_Don't worry. It is._

_Good._

_By the way, you're already storing up most of the electrons in the sky. Wait until you see an opening, and make him a path._

_How?_

_Oh, for fuck's sake...I'm part of your soul, damn it! You can figure it out! Hell, you should have been able to do that to the LAST person in your haori!_

_Well, maybe I should try on something smaller..._

_What are you suggesting?_

Zaraki dodged another swing by his opponent, and slashed at Reina Del Sangre. He could feel power flow into his blade.

Probably those "electros," or whatever they were called.

_You took those without asking, Zaraki. You should give them back._

_No problem._

He let go of his hold on the new power, letting it shoot back into the blade...

But metal seemed to be too easy a path for this new power...

It shot right back into Kisuke.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHH..."

Urahara Kisuke had exploded from the inside out.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"TAICHOOO!!"

"Yes, fukutaicho?"

Sarugaki Hiyori turned to see her perfectly intact former taicho standing right behind her.

"YOU BASTARD!"

She started punching at him.

"Hiyori, Hiyori, what's the matter?"

"I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAummpph!"

"And we're trying to make Zaraki keep thinking that. Quiet down!"

"Well, so much for Zaraki-taicho holding you back..."

"Kid, you really take your job way too seriously."

"Says the man who got fired for illegal experiments."

It took every once of patience Kisuke possessed to avoid gutting the presumptuous Shiro bastard right there and then.

"So, who wants to try to talk him into pulling back?" Matsumoto's nervous tone made clear she didn't.

"Now that we have him here, I doubt we need to."

"Hitsugaya-taicho, that ugly doubt of yours is going to get us all killed."

"You don't have faith in him?"

I think you can all guess who grimaced at the vizard. "Not if these guys' friends show up."

"Well, I've had my fun... aren't you dead?"

Kisuke groaned. "Oh shit."

"You know, I've had enough of this... let's double team him, Kisuke." Kensei's hand moved onto his face, and a vaguely Jason-ish mask appeared.

Zaraki grinned. "Let's go."

All three disappeared.

"Okay, at the risk of sounding single-minded, we're probably never going to get a better chance at our objective..."

"Who would that be?"

Hitsugaya breathed a sigh of relief. His job was now much easier. "Told you."

Ichigo, on the other hand, was starting to panic.

Tessai facepalmed. Hard.

There was the target, standing behind them, alone except for some dumbass in a white suit. (Tessai knew who he was, of course, and vaguely wondered how he could have allowed her to do something so damn stupid.)

"Kuchiki Rukia, you are under arrest for..."

"I suggest you close your mouth." The man in the suit pulled out a rosary, and let them all see it.

Miyamoto was the only one who recognized it, other than Rukia's allies, and the taicho.

_Oh, shit. Why now?_

Hitsugaya was not impressed. "Am I supposed to be scared of some Quincy trinket?"

The answer was a couple of spirit arrows. If Hitsugaya wasn't so fast, he'd have lost both knees, and both vital spirit points.

"Soten ni zase, Hyorin..."

"Hado: Number 33... Red Fire Shot!"

This time, Hitsugaya somehow avoided decapitation. Ichigo is pretty good that way...

**Oh, come on.**

**Anyone? I'm not expecting an instant success, but come on!**

**Plx review?**


	39. Conflict Reawakened

Toshiro watched as the spell rocketed into the sky.

"God-damn."

That was all he could say about it.

It kind of distracted him, a little. Him, and most of the other forces of law and order.

But not the target.

"Mai, Sode no Shirayuki!"

Rukia didn't have that much trouble targeting Toshiro.

She never really liked him _that_ much.

She wasn't that surprised to see him jump straight into the air trying to avoid the attack. After all, he really didn't know her abilities that well.

She was surprised to see how much her ability to push her advantage had increased. She had never made the ice climb _that_ fast before meeting Ichigo.

Toshiro should have been able to dodge, but surprise did, after all, count almost as much as strength.

Almost.

"_**BANKAI, DAIGUREN HYORINMARU!"**_

The column of ice exploded from the inside.

That done, he turned to look at the Quincy and the lesser ice-type.

And the poison type who had just joined them.

"A taicho-level ice zanpakuto?"

Toshiro grinned grimly. "You guessed it."

The vizard grinned. "Good. I think I can handle that." His hand moved onto his face, and his smile was obscured by a white growth.

"WHAT!?"

The monster was probably still grinning. "Flames before me, flames behind..."

Now, Toshiro was slightly single minded, but other than that, was rather bright. He certainly tried to adequately judge his opponents' abilties. For instance, if he really thought Urahara could be trusted to tell the truth about Aizen, he would have ordered a retreat right there and then.

And of course, any ice type with a brain would have reacted the same way having heard even that small part of Sora's release command.

"Flames in the heart..."

He jumped aside, and lost his place in the command phrase. He looked at the ice storm that had destroyed the space _he_ had occupied a split second earlier.

"You need a shorter command phrase, criminal."

"How's this? CERO!"

Toshiro jumped aside.

And jumped again when he heard a calm, adult voice right behind him.

"I see you can dodge."

He instinctively jumped aside.

Which was smart. If he hadn't started moving, and kept moving, he'd have gotten a backful of arrows.

He stopped moving, and looked at his new attacker.

"Is that all you have, Quincy?"

Isshin smiled. "Dance."

If Toshiro had jumped a nanosecond later, he'd have gotten a hole in each foot.

Matsumoto was watching all of this, when a thought occurred to her.

"You know, I should probably be fighting too."

Hiyori shrugged. "Well, you certainly _should _fight..."

Hiyori unsheathed her blade.

"Now do you want to?"

"No, but I don't really think I have a choice. I'd kind of like to avoid getting fired."

Most of her allies were surprised to hear that, given how little she seemed to care about that detail most of the time...

"I guess you're right..." said a very resigned looked red-head.

Abarai Renji and Miyamoto Tadakatsu drew their blades.

"How ugly."

You guys know the running gag, by now. But yes, he drew his, too.

Miyamoto sighed. "You know, if you just hand over Rukia..."

He ducked as Zangetsu swung right through where his head had been. This guy was _fast._

"Hoero, Zabimaru!"

"Sake, Fuji Kujaku!"

Ichigo blocked the blade that shot out at him, and then jumped forward and kicked Yumichika in the chest. He flew backward a good distance, but rolled on the ground, and jumped back onto his feet.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

About seventy feet above the battlefield...

Just as Matsumoto pointed out that they weren't doing their jobs...

"Got you!" Hitsugaya brought his blade down, thinking to finish the Quincy in the first attack.

He found his icy blade blocked by one covered in flames.

"Oh..." Here follows a word that a kid like Toshiro shouldn't even have known...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Miyamoto watched as his two comrades drew away one enemy.

The sad part is, it probably _increased_ his odds.

Though not by much.

He sighed.

"So, are you going to hand her over?"

Nobody answered.

"I should have stayed in bed..."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

An invisible Aizen Sosuke looked on the proceedings.

"This isn't getting me anywhere..."

All of the adjuchas who had been ordered to bring her back alive had died.

That was expected of course, though he wished the two he'd let know the mission was doomed had gotten the hint.

He didn't expect they would, of course.

But this was just turning into a stalemate.

He was able to prevent a full retreat by Seireitei's men, using the little distraction of the adjuchas just as they were about to leave.

But the continued fighting was getting him nowhere...

And Zaraki's power...

That was unnerving.

Aizen wasn't sure he could go up against that...

That was why he needed the orb's power.

He needed a mask...

**Please review.**


	40. Backup Plan

**And I'm STILL doing better than Uncle Joe!**

Aizen sighed.

Pondering his current limits was all well and good, but now wasn't the time.

He raised his sword.

"Kudakero, Kyoka Suigetsu."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"_Attention, all shinigami. The Chambers Of The Central 46 offices have ordered all shinigami currently fighting in Karakura Town to abort the mission. Leave the target, and abandon the battlefield as soon as possible. We have lost two taicho. Losing more soldiers would be counterproductive."_

Tosen sighed. He knew fully well that Aizen would not have deployed two potential Espada without cause: having his illusionary Central 46 admit defeat was disheartening, but not entirely unexpected. His plan for creating justice, true justice, would have to wait, but it **was** going to happen.

The question is, would Aizen and Gin get in the way?

He heard footsteps behind him. He did not turn. He recognized the sound of the footfalls, and could not see , at any rate.

"Hey, Tosen."

"Ichimaru-taicho."

"We got new orders. Investigating a fukutaicho."

"Did these orders come from Central 46?"

"Looks like-it. We're alone, ya know."

"I know. I simply exercise caution as a general rule."

"Yeah, Aizen's set it up. 'E made an illusion of 'imself to say, we're going with Soifon..."

They became aware of her reiatsu simultaneously. Fortunately, she was still out of earshot when they noticed it.

"Tosen-taicho. Has Ichimaru-taicho finished briefing you?"

"No. We're performing an investigation of a fukutaicho, working with you. That's all."

"Kusajishi Yachiru. Suspected of experimentation with illegal techniques, using hollow abilities to increase her already formidable power."

_This is not good,_ Tosen thought. _If Aizen was experimenting on someone this formidable, the effects will likely be a disaster. Why the hell would he do something like that? Especially when the Hougyoku is so close?_

"I see you are worried."

"I am."

"So am I. That's why I'm taking the Executive Militia fukutaicho with me instead of that Omeyada moron."

A ninja with a zanpakuto that was longer than Gin's by an inch appeared beside and behind Soifon.

"Is 'e any good?"

He answered by vanishing. Gin vanished as well. There were three sounds like swords crossing, and they reappeared.

Gin vanished again, and the other as swiftly. Two more sounds, and they reappeared.

Gin sheathed his blade.

His grin deepened.

"'E's the best at 'is rank I've ever seen. Got Matsumoto and Izuru beat bad. 'E'll do nicely."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Miyamoto sheathed his blade.

"I just got a recall order. Normally I'd be disappointed, but I don't really like the odds of facing all of you down, even without that orange-haired boy helping you."

None of the ones facing him sheathed their blades.

"Then you should leave," Hiyori stated.

"I intend to."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Hitsugaya had his new orders.

He was relieved to be able to retreat. He did not want to die, nor did he want any of his friends to.

"I just got a recall order. I am to retreat, and forget the objective. May I retrieve my comrade's remains first, if I can find them?"

The Quincy and Vizard shared a glance. Neither wished to say no, but if either had, the other would not have objected to their refusal.

They lowered, but did not sheathe or dispel, their weapons.

"You may retrieve his remains," Isshin said.

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

_There's a hell butterfly nearby, Zaraki. We ought to examine its message before it starts._

_You sure?_

_There's no way in fuck it'll survive this. Not with all the power we'll be throwing around._

_We probably don't need to know anyway..._

_This is a fight involving criminals more powerful than any of us has either seen. Few hollows even come close. "Probably don't need to know" is not good enough here._

_..._

_..._

_..._

_We might as well. _Zaraki held up his hand for it to perch.

"_Zaraki Kenpachi. You are hereby ordered to bring your division off of the battlefield. The odds of victory are slim to none. You and your men, with the exception of your fukutaicho, are ordered to use the same senkaimon as the other shinigami retreating. Kusajishi Yachiru-fukutaicho, however, is ordered to open her own, and leave for Seireitei on her own. Do not accompany her._

_..._

_..._

_..._

"I just got retreat orders. Doubt I'll get in too much trouble for not doing it, though."

_Zaraki, you moron._

_What? We can take them._

_Why should we?_

_Why shouldn't we?_

_There's something else that came up?_

_You mean those stupid retreat orders?  
_

_Yes. Doesn't it strike you as odd that Yachiru gets her own senkaimon?_

Zaraki thought about it. _Yeah. Kind of. What do you make of it?_

_I think that it's worth investigating. We're disobeying those damn orders, but we **are** retreating, and we're using the same gate Yachiru opens._

Zaraki did not like this. But he was sufficiently curious as to what the hell was going on to acquiesce.

_Should I take my men with me?_

Goraishi could appreciate the change. Zaraki would never have gotten such a bright idea a couple of days, hell, even an hour ago. This was working fast.

_They won't make much difference, but we might as well._

_Got it._

"You know, actually, those retreat orders are kind of worded funny. I wouldn't have noticed, but my sword pointed it out."

Kensei looked at his friend curiously.

"You're saying that there was some strange order you got?" Kisuke asked.

"Yeah. Yachiru's supposed to go back alone."

His two no-longer-opponents looked at each other.

"Are you going to obey this order?" Kisuke asked.

"No," Zaraki said. "I'd have to be pretty dense to do that."

"You can tell what'll happen, then?" Kensei asked.

"Something fucked up," Zaraki replied. "Beyond that, I don't really..."

He suddenly realized that Yachiru's new powers reeked of hollow.

"Oh shit. Yeah, I think I can guess. Her new powers, right?"

"Yeah. I'd say it's an attempt on her soul's part to focus the reiatsu she must have soaked up when you awoke... Goraishi, right?"

_Now how come he hears it the first damn time?!_

"Yeah, that's 'im."

"So, what now?" Kensei was okay at keeping order, but far-reaching plots were Kisuke's line.

And... he was about to find, Goraishi's.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"I think this is him." Hitsugaya Toshiro looked at what was clearly (to the non-hypnotized Quincy , though not to the vizard, who had had no practice checking) a dead gigai.

"Yes. You should take it to your comrades." The Quincy was bursting to say how ridiculous this looked, but he knew better than to fly in the face of what was almost impossible to tell wasn't reality.

"I will. Thank you for allowing me to recover this."

"It was the honorable thing to do," Ishida Ryuken said in a low, convincingly regretful voice. _How I long to see the real one go that way..._

Seeing that Hitsugaya had his blade sheathed and his hands full, Sora allowed his mask to drop. He did not seal or sheathe his blades. The reiatsu wasted by shikai was almost trivial at his current state, unlike his mask. He could hold his own with a fukutaicho using just this power, long enough to go vizard, and become taicho level.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"My men and I 'r going in the same senkaimon Yachiru does. I'll tell them what's going on, and tell them to say I mis-represented the orders. For all Seireitei's going to know, they'll have thought I wanted us to use our own gate, and it had nothing to do with the orders. This's what my sword came up with drop-of-a-hat-like, and he'll change it if 'e 'as to."

Kisuke was impressed.

"One more thing..."

Kisuke, who one moment wanted to kill Zaraki, was getting sympathetic. It was the same feeling that had him pissed of that had him wanting to help.

"You think you and your fukutaicho might need to leave. And your men, worst case scenario."

"Yep."

"I could try to set something up." Kensei offered.

"Can you?" Zaraki asked.

Kensei touched the bakudo mark on his chest.

_Shinji? We have a situation. Someone else like us. Not a vizard, but same type of creature._

_Can he control his powers?_

_She, but yes. I think. No problems yet._

_Got it. What's her name?_

_Kusajishi Yachiru._

_..._

_..._

_..._

_No joke?_

_Nope._

_What about Zaraki? I could feel his power through the barrier..._

_His reiatsu spiked bigtime, and Yachiru was you-know-where. She soaked it up like a sponge, and it did something. We think her soul mutated._

_Never mind that. Is he coming with her?_

_If she has to leave. We think she will, she got orders to use a separate senkaimon to retreat._

_Retreat?_

_Yeah. Central 46 called it. Or that's what Aizen wants it to look like._

_Hm. I won't say this is a good thing, but at least our power goes up this way._

_So, if she gets exiled..._

_It's the only way to be sure a shinigami is a decent person, it looks like. If she gets fired, she can stay with us. And Zaraki too._

_What if his men get exiled? He said he might ask them to help._

_Any friend of one of our kind is a friend of ours, I guess._

_Good. I'll give them the news. Out._

"I used a spell to contact Shinji. If things go bad, you and your men can stay with us."

"Thanks."

**I told Blak-Ninja I was planning this plot twist, and the fallout.**

**He and I alone know exactly what I have planned for the return to Seireitei.**

**(At least I think he does. Not sure how often he checks his facebook...)**

**And if you guess, please don't spoil it for...**

**whoever else still reads this.**

**And Blak-Ninja, please don't spoil it.**

**And I wasn't joking. I need you to remind me what the shikai and bankai are supposed to be for Tadakatsu's blade. I can't find the email. Seriously.**

**Anyway, please review.**


	41. Retirement, In A Way

"Yo, Tadakatsu, this way!"

The Fourth Seat of the Eleventh Division looked up and saw his taicho sitting in the air.

"Follow me."

"Hai."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"About time you were getting up, Madarame."

"Uh... What happened, taicho?"

"You got your ass kicked by a girl. She should have been Eleventh Division, not Twelfth. Oh well, we gotta talk. Let's find the other two."

"Hey, Ken-chan!"

"Okay, just Yumichika."

"Girly's with everyone else!"

"Someone go get him."

Tadakatsu shunpo-ed away.

"Yumichika, this way!"

"Hai." Yumichika didn't hesitate to obey.

"Okay, what's, oh, taicho!"

Zaraki felt like getting down to it. "There's something wrong."

"I'll say. I expected you to keep fighting!"

"I was going to, but my sword talked me out of it."

"What!?"

"Yeah. The retreat order said that Yachiru is supposed to go in a separate senkaimon, without anyone going with her."

"Wh... what? Why?"

"That's what Goraishi is wondering. He wants us all to go in the same one."

"What? What's going on!?"

"I think it has something to do with her new powers. They feel like hollow techniques, don't they?"

"Yeah, but how could..."

"No idea, but it doesn't matter. I think they're trying to get her alone to arrest her."

"Then let's all go with her!" Let it never be said that Madarame Ikkaku was the type to abandon a friend.

"I was about to suggest that, but this isn't the sort of thing I can order anyone to do..."

"We'll do it anyway!" Tadakatsu was loyal to his fukutaicho as well.

"Okay, but if what I think will happen does, we'll all get thrown out..."

"Oh, crap." Yumichika started having second thoughts.

Yachiru and Kenpachi didn't mind his reaction at all. The other two looked at him disgustedly.

"What was that?" Madarame couldn't believe his ears.

"Guys, I've got a question..."

"Do we want to hear it?" Tadakatsu had a stern face.

"Believe me, I'm not worried about myself. I'm okay with exile, don't worry, but... if we leave, what happens to the division?"

"Oh, crap. He's right."

"What?" Madarame still didn't get it.

"It's like this. If we all have to leave, who'll run the division? Nobody besides us is anywhere near qualified for taicho's position, or fukutaicho's."

Madarame hadn't thought of this, nor had Zaraki. "Oh, crap." They both said it at once.

Zaraki sighed. "Well, I can't ask any of you to stay behind, either."

Tadakatsu looked around. "Well, what do you think?"

"I know! Maybe Baldy could be the new taicho!"

"Wh-What? I just wanted to be a subordinate! I can't be a taicho! I have no idea how to do it!"

"So? Neither do I."

"You have to!" Once Yachiru had something in her head, it wasn't coming out anyplace but her mouth.

"What about Abarai?! Can't he do it?!"

"Not yet." Tadakatsu said. "He'll probably gain bankai soon, judging by his level of skill."

"YEAH! ABARAI CAN!"

"I can what?" Renji had gotten curious when he heard the shouting.

_Oh, crap, _they all thought in unison.

"Don't worry about it. So, I didn't see Aizen. Where is he?"

"Dead. Urahara told us it happened, but none of us really wanted to believe it. Then Hitsugaya found the body after the retreat got ordered. Nice of those criminals to let us look for it, I know for a fact Kuchiki-taicho wouldn't have been as cool."

"But seriously, I can do what?" Renji acted incredibly stupid, but was really inconveniently sharp.

"Urahara. So, the legend is fighting alongside the vizard. Sad." Madarame couldn't help but respect Kisuke, and regret him going over.

"Abarai. I've been meaning to tell you something. I've been planning to retire for a while, and Yachiru and I have enough money saved up that we could both do it. If I did, would you be willing to take my place?" Zaraki wanted to see if the Eleventh Division could spare Madarame. If they could, that was great.

"I don't even have bankai yet!"

"We all know you're close. Just because your taicho's as dense as a granite wall doesn't mean we are."

"YEAH, YOU CAN DO IT!" Madarame was _definitely_ not taking the job if he could push it off on Renji.

"But you have bankai now!" Renji had been the first to guess. "So why can't you..."

Madarame shunpo-ed over and shut Renji's mouth. "We do NOT want anyone overhearing, jackass."

"Srryy" was all that could be heard through Ikkaku's hand.

"I told my men, and they said they all want to retire to. Kind of a stretch, but I think we've got enough between us. If we all did, could you take over? I'd kind of like for Madarame to, but if you can, I'd be happy to let him retire..."

"Are you all nuts?! You'll be cutting of the division's head!"

"I'm not sure I want to retire. It would certainly be less of a strain on Zaraki's funds if I stayed. Do you think I should stay, Renji?"

"YES!"

"And you think I should become taicho? I'm am definitely not cut out for this..."

"You'll do fine!"

"But what about when you get bankai?"

Renji hadn't thought that far ahead yet.

"Well, I think someone needs to take over Fifth Division."

"FIFTH DIVISION!?"

"Fifth Division. They need a new taicho more than your guys do. Hinamori-san is going to have a hell of a time piecing herself back together. That man was her whole life."

"Surest path to a mental breakdown." Tadakatsu wasn't referring to Momo as much as he was to Yumichika and Madarame.

"If Madarame-san stays, I'm staying. Same if he goes." Pretty much proved Tadakatsu's point about Yumichika, didn't it?

"So, you're all staying?"

"Not me!" The words were pretty much a squeal.

Renji looked at Zaraki and Yachiru. "Why are you both retiring?"

"Because I got the cash on me, and I feel like it."

"On a taicho's salary?"

"I get paid better than most taicho. Mainly because our guys kill more hollows than the other divisions. Combined with my pension, it's easy street from here." This was not the complete truth: he DID get more cash per payday, but not enough to retire at this point, even with his pension (which he didn't think he'd be getting, at any rate.) Yeah, he'd be kind of shafted without the vizard helping.

Renji didn't completely buy it, either. "Really?"

"Yeah. So you're all staying?"

Trust Abarai Renji to talk some sense into their thick skulls. "Yeah, we're not retiring."

"So okay. You guys all go back. Yachiru and I will catch up after we open our own senkaimon. We need to plan for our retirement."

"Got it."

The Eleventh Division's shinigami all disappeared as one. Renji stayed a millisecond longer to cast a confused glance at Zaraki.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"uhh..." Hinamori Momo sat up sleepily.

As her vision cleared, she could just make out a figure with a cane.

"I think you should go back to sleep."

The cane became a blur.

She felt a pressure on her forehead, and descended back to where she had come from.


	42. Growing As You Shrink

**You know what I find you can do if you can't think of any ideas for a beach fanfic?**

**Write about Hueco Mundo.**

"Wow. The adjuchas couldn't help him, so now he thinks our gillians can make a difference?"

"He never explains his thought processes to anyone, except maybe those two other damn shinigami traitors..."

"Well, anyway, we gotta send 'em..."

"In these numbers, I think I can see the logic behind doing this, even if Aizen-sama won't tell us..."

So it was that the guardians of the Forest Of Menos deployed 457 non-sapient menos grande to attack Karakura High.

Nobody expected any meaningful resistance.

Aizen-sama had said that the law-and-order retards were leaving soon, and would probably be gone by the time the gillians arrived. The adjuchas weren't sure this was true, but didn't care. What meaningful resistance could they provide, at this point?

It turned out not to matter...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Rudobon walked along with the menos hordes sent to the material world.

"Hungry as hell" didn't begin to describe the void in his lost soul.

Even sentient gillians have limited minds, relative to what adjuchas and vasto lordes have, but Rudobon could still remember _exactly_ how many gillians he had eaten. Some how, every sentient gillian could keep that count effortlessly.

And Rudobon was increasing it at a rate of two a second.

_Two Hundred Three, Two Hundred Four, Two Hundred Five, Two Hundred Six, Two Hundred Seven, Two Hundred Eight..._

Even with his limited ability to think, he knew he could only blend in up until they neared the cavern to the surface.

He would then have to leave the group, and hope no adjuchas made unwelcome connections...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Shrieker looked at the army of menos headed for the cave to the material world.

He had heard the summons, but only non-sapients were unable to resist. He was impossible to control, unless he submitted to it, which he saw no reason to. If it were rebel hollows, he could get a snack. As it was, he could get a one-way-ticket to hell. Quite literally, given his past...

But these non-sapients...

He wondered how he could get them all, with no escapees..

He then remembered the caves that were the only way to the surface...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

_Okay, I'll need to ditch soon._

Five more died under Rudobon's teeth.

_I should slow my pace, so I can leave the crowd inconspicously..._

It was then that he felt a familiar reiatsu. He watched as the gillian he had met a couple of days ago blasted the cave he had decided to leave the group at. It collapsed as the cero bit into the roof.

_Well, I don't really mind sharing my food..._

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Shrieker sliced through the hordes with his teeth. He went at a leisurely pace. It wasn't like these fools were going anywhere. They had orders to use this cave to go to the material world. They were too foolish to take a detour.

No, they were too foolish to do anything, beyond fight mindlessly, and occasionally help each other kill shinigami.

They couldn't even help each other too well, of course. The Forest Guardians coordinated their attacks, as well as determining which route they would take to their objectives. Without orders, they were good for one thing.

They were **very** good for one thing.

They were better for it than anything else he could imagine getting his hands on.

Delicious, and nutritious.

He was interrupted from this line of thought when he noticed the ram-masked sapient he had run into a few days earlier.

There was no sign of surprise in the ram-mask's aura. Evidently, he had recognized his reiatsu earlier. Probably he had been harvesting these morons, and noticed Shrieker casting the cero that had doomed them all.

He felt the ram-mask's aura shift into a "smile."

An evil smile, this time.

But evil in a friendly way...

The message was clear...

_Dinner for two?_

The message behind Shrieker's response smile was clear, too.

_Sounds like fun._

_**One Massive Chomp-Fest Later...**_

There were two non-sapients left.

Shrieker and Rudobon closed in.

They finished their respective victims simultaneously...

And felt their minds and powers expand as their bodies shrank...

**How'd I do?**

**Please review.**


	43. Announcement To Make

Zaraki sighed. "Okay, no use putting things off. Let's go over to the rest of the shinigami in the field and announce our retirement."

"Won't they find out eventually, anyway?" Yachiru wasn't sure what had happened to her adoptive father, or if she really liked it.

"Yeah, but we might as well tell them we're going, so they don't go looking for us."

"Why?"

"Our own men might get not know we left. I don't particularly care for the rest of them, but I want to at least do our friends a favor."

"Okay." She could see where he was coming from there. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Okay, everyone's here."

Everyone looked at Zaraki.

"I feel like announcing something now. I told the three of you from my division two weeks ago, and Renji a couple of minutes ago."

He took a breath.

"I'm retiring, effective as of right now."

Matsumoto burst out laughing.

"Good one, taicho!"

Hitsugaya gave her a look. "When's the last time Zaraki-taicho ever told one of those?"

Matsumoto looked confused. "Wait, but wouldn't that mean he's serious?"

Madarame looked at her.

"He is serious." Zaraki was glad his men took the subtle cue as to how to behave. He didn't need Madarame telling everyone he had decided a couple of minutes ago, and the decision was effective as he spoke it.

Ordinarily, a good lie contained as much truth as possible. However, he wanted the Central 46 to think he'd been planning to leave for a while.

The alternative was for Central 46 to think he'd told his men he was retiring effective immediately, immediately after the fukutaicho he would have died to protect developed hollow-like abilities, and that they had accepted this without suspicion.

Even 4th division wouldn't think they could be THAT stupid. Trying a story like that, when the circumstances were already looking bad (Central 46 would probably suspect them of knowing of the nonexistent experiments) the best that could happen would probably be exile.

As it was, they had a slightly less weak story, which Central 46 _might _feel was plausible enough to let them go, even if they didn't believe it entirely.

_Blessed Kami, please don't let them be exiled._

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"So, here it is."

Uryu looked at the shop, and then back at the cat.

"And Ryuken thought I'd be safe here?" Uryu had no idea how the hell this could be any safer than the front.

"There's a high level barrier on the shop. If you try to break it, you're more than likely to break your weapon instead. As for dismantling it, that's almost impossible. Do one step wrong, and the barrier comes back at full strength, and blasts you with a high level Hado spell besides."

"So, how do we get in?"

"The barrier is attuned to my reiatsu, so I can get in whenever. It's also attuned to Quincy abilities, so that Ryuken can get in. The reason we didn't just attune it to Ryuken's reiatsu is that we thought we might need to hide you here someday."

"Well, that makes about as much sense as anything in a Quincy's life can, I suppose." Uryu shrugged, taking this relatively stoically. "So, where's the owner?"

"On the battlefield. The barrier should be enough to protect you, but I'll stick around, just to be safe."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Well, I've said my piece. My men will be going back with you. Yachiru and I will be taking our gate back. Any questions?"

There weren't. Zaraki supposed that this was a good thing. That nobody objected meant that nobody besides the Eleventh knew Yachiru was supposed to take her own gate.

If Central 46 had ratted on them to the others, there could potentially be issues...


	44. Yachiru's Vocabulary

"Okay, seeya."

Zaraki opened the gate. He passed through with, Yachiru on his shoulder.

"Okay, now we need to sheathe our weapons before we get into the Court. If we go in looking like we know what's going on, they'll be more likely to investigate, or more likely, castigate or even castrate, our pals."

Yachiru cast him a confused look. "I didn't know you knew half of those words."

"Sure I do. I just don't really like using em."

"Okay."

A second later...

"What's 'castrate'?"

Zaraki, who had assumed she already knew that word, kicked himself.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"So, they're comin' through here? Together? E'en though Central 46 said Yachiru's coming back alone?"

"What is the last order you can remember Zaraki-taicho obeying?"

Gin thought for a second...

"Remember that time the soutaicho made him take kendo lessons?"

The memory came back to all three with distressing clarity...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"You are the worst student I have ever had! You have yet to learn a SINGLE ATTACK! It has been a MONTH!"

Zaraki thought this was going a bit far...

"I learn'd somethin'..."

"Have you!?"

"Yeah... you said they told everyone to leave this quarter of Seireitei, right?"

Yamamoto was starting to wonder if this was the _WORST_ mistake of his career...

"They were. By now, everyone should have been gone for the past hour...

"Good."

His demonstration proceeded to prove to Yamamoto's doubters that the precaution was not excessive...

"In the event of an attack by a hollow made of granite or diamond, we may be able to put that to use."

Zaraki's grin got even more insane...

Yamamoto made a mental note to pray devoutly and desperately to whatever Kami would listen that these fearsome creatures never appeared...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"'Castrate' is when you pull out a knife, and cut a boy or man with it, so he turns sad forever."

"So, 'castrate' means kill?"

"No. It means even worse."

"Oh. Wow, that's mean."

"So, you never heard that word before?"

"I heard it once. Bya-kun said he'd do it to Red-Pineapple-head if Red-Pineapple-head looked at Bya-kun's sister again! Bya-kun's so mean to say he'll do that to his fukutaicho! Maybe that's why he looked so embarrassed when I asked what it meant."

Kuckiki Byakuya looking embarrassed? Now THAT would be one hell of a snapshot!

But now Zaraki had something else to worry about.

_Okay, how do I sheathe you?_

_You can't. Just rub the blunt edge against your back like a back-scratcher for a second. Then, my powers will hold it._

Zaraki did, and the blade just clung to his jacket.

_How's that work?_

_Static cling. It's like how clothes stick together when they first come out of the dryer. Well, electrons cause it, and we control them, so..._

_We really are kind of kido type..._

_Most zanpakuto are, kind of. It's just that some are more hado than bakudo, and visa versa. At any rate, it's not like this is all we can do. We CAN obliterate whole armies of menos, given enough electrons..._

_Got it. Shouldn't we be there by now, though?_

And as if on cue, the gate opened.

**So, do I have to stop making fun of Uncle Joe?**

**Either way, please r&r.**


	45. Tosen Proving He Has Some Balls

"Zaraki-taicho. I see you still believe following orders to be beneath you." Kaname's voice was colder than anyone present had ever heard it. His glare at his "comrade" was similarly distressing. Nobody in Seireitei, maybe not even Aizen, had thought him capable of such a cold manner.

Zaraki's glare and tone were also at a new level of malice, and Gin would never quite remember how he had kept his shit in his colon upon hearing him say: "Not my fault Central 46 did this so transparently."

"'Ey, we shouldn't talk like this! We're friends!" Gin was really hoping he could get a happy (for him) ending out of this. He didn't care if Zaraki and Yachiru escaped, he didn't even really care if everyone present besides himself and the two thought-to-be-criminals died so those two could escape, he just didn't want to DIE!

He'd rather not run, because that wouldn't look good, but better than getting diced!

He was also vaguely wondering why Zaraki had been wearing that eyepatch. Apparently, his eye worked just fine...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

_I think they're all on that stretch of road in front of us. If that's true, a sufficiently strong, sufficiently fast attack with enough spread should kill them all instantly._

_Which means? _Zaraki was hoping this meant his zanpakuto had a less kido-type power he was hoping to unveil.

_Well, remember that attack you hit the fake Kisuke with?_

_That can take them all at once?_

_Well, we really didn't scratch the surface with that first attempt..._

_DAMN! I'm starting to like you..._

_Same here. There's a drawback, though..._

_Which is?_

_The only way I can think of to do it without drawing too much attention is to turn your back to them. You could also do it by pulling me off your back, but then they'll try to jump you._

_Turning my back'll piss Tosen off... I LIKE IT!_

_Okay. Another problem. It'll involve letting that reiatsu you've been bottling up go wild, and drain the negative charge from that road. That'll scare 'em, and they might attack before you can get enough charge built to tear 'em apart. Of course, they're not as likely to as if you pulled out your sword._

_Then why don't I just pull you off my back?_

_Because this way we'll have a little more time, and we might be able to plan where to aim, and who to let go._

_Why let one go?_

_That one will be able say for sure what you're capable of. It's better to have a witness to say how easily you killed the others. It'll keep the survivors off our new friends backs._

"Kusajishi Yachiru-fukutaicho." Soifon was the one to get to business, finally. "You have been summoned by the Central 46 Offices to explain your sudden rise in power. You will appear before them immediately, after which you, Zaraki Kenpachi-taicho, will explain to them why you disobeyed their orders."

"Hm... What do you think, Ken-chan?"

Kenpachi turned his back. A force flew from his back, and scared everyone except himself and Yachiru. Tosen was probably more pissed than scared, but he was certainly very both.

To his surprise, Kenpachi also felt fear ripple in from all around him. Too late he wondered why these guys came alone, instead of bringing an army with them... He also wondered, again too late, why the hell they were all in front of him...come to think of it, this ambush's obvious parts were a little to pathetic to be believed.

If it weren't for the obvious deception he'd already seen through, he'd probably have seen this coming a mile off...

_Oh crap... No turning back now, I guess..._

"I think you four need to get laid."

Zaraki felt a swift motion through the spare reiatsu. Before he could react, he felt a blade strike the back of his neck.

Blood splattered all over him.


	46. Leaving Witnesses

"Bet THAT wasn't what he was going for..."

Zaraki picked up what was left of Tosen, and tossed him to the side, off of the stretch of road he'd electrified.

_And now you're sparing him. I wish I could see the look on his face..._

_Too bad we won't be around, huh?_

_Yeah, that's no fun... Too bad, huh, boss?_

_Oh well._

_So, he might survive. We should spare someone else, to make sure. Those injuries look kind of bad, and there's no reiatsu signatures small enough to be Fourth Division around here. I'd say he's more than likely going to die where he is. Hang on..._

Goraishi borrowed his master's eyes...

_Gin looks ready to run. I say we scare him shitless._

Zaraki grinned even more insanely. _Good thinking._

Zaraki began to advance.

"'Ey, Zaraki! Tosen was kind of out of line, huh?"

_dontkillmedontkillmedontkillme_

Zaraki kept advancing.

"Wat's wrong, pal?

_dontkillmedontkillmedontkillmedontkillmedontkillmedontkillme_

Zaraki kept advancing...

"DON'T KILL ME! PLEASE!"

Zaraki's maniacal grin widened.

He closed the remaining distance...

"Run. Away. Now."

Gin was about to anyway. He didn't need the invitation too badly...

Once that was taken care of, he turned to Soifon.

And found a golden fingernail at his throat.

"Zaraki Kenpachi-taicho, you are under arrest for attempted murder, and for resisting arrest."

Zaraki grinned. "Congratulations on the sneak attack."

"Don't toy with me, you..."

Zaraki put a single pointer finger on her forehead.

And her eyes shot out of focus.

He carefully pulled Suzumebachi away from his throat.

_So, how many survivors should we leave?_

_I don't know. It depends. Gin can testify how scary you are, and if you spare Soifon, she can testify how much power you have. I say we leave it up to chance..._

_How do we do that?_

_I say we throw her through a couple of walls. Specifically, the ones to the right._

Zaraki looked at them.

_What's so special about the walls to the right?_

_Your sense of direction is all in here... The Fourth Division HQ should be in that direction, through about twenty walls. Unohana's office is on the first floor, through the first wall in the building. If you can get her through all the walls necessary, and the force doesn't kill her instantly, she should pull through. Also, even if she dies, it'll scare people, providing a good enough scare... Imagine how those Fourth Division pussies will react to having a taicho fly into their HQ. They might even get training, like they should have the second Madarame first stepped into Seireitei..._

Zaraki laughed.

_Okay..._

"Hey, Yachiru?"

"Yes, Ken-chan?"

"Watch this..."

He grabbed Soifon by the top of her head...

"Zaraki-taicho!"

Zaraki saw the army he had sensed appear all around him, all of them were wearing the Executive Militia uniform. It looked like Soifon had brought every ninja she could to help.

Well, that probably would have made a difference BEFORE he'd unleashed Goraishi's power...

"Now this is more like it! Okay, everyone, watch this!"

He threw Soifon.

Hard.

"Taicho!"

There was no way the Militia could do anything now. Either she'd live, or she'd die.

"You bastard!"

One of the ninja on the electrified road ran at him.

BIG mistake...

Zaraki reached for his blade...

"GIAN, GORAISHI!

The sunlight around Zaraki dimmed and vanished as a bolt of negative charge shot out from his sword.

The road was ripped apart, as were the soldiers standing on it.

**Bakudo type? Hado type?**

**Both? Neither?**

**You decide. I don't really care.**

**Anyway, please review, and I'll try to have another one up on Christmas.**


	47. Awakening in his arms

"Are you all okay? It's a little late for second thoughts now..."

The ninja hesitated for a second.

"What, no fight? Then I guess I should just... leave."

The Militia fukutaicho, as much as he didn't want to, decided that now would be a good time to set an example for his men...

He drew his sword.

_Well, maybe this'll set a good example for that rich fat-ass in 2nd division..._

He shunpo-ed forward, swinging for Zaraki's left eye.

_And maybe **he'll** need another eye-patch..._

Zaraki twisted aside, and swung Goraishi at the ninja's left ribs.

The fukutaicho, who didn't want to set _that _kind of example, stepped on Zaraki's sword arm, jumped upward, and **somehow** avoided the four curved blades that just **screamed** Grim Reaper.

He came down behind Zaraki, and attempted a thrust...

A quick sidestep later, Zaraki found he had a clear shot...

The fukutaicho saw it too, and attempted to dodge as Zaraki swung...

The fukutaicho screamed as the smallest blade, which was the closest to looking anything like a pinky-finger, caught his arm, and the middle "finger" caught the side of his head.

Superficial injuries, but they _still_ pissed him off.

"I think Ballsy-san could use some help. Anyone?" Zaraki was partially motivated by the desire for a more enjoyable fight, but he mostly felt sorry for the poor, deserted, soon-to-be-a-casualty.

"Go to hell, you criminal bastard!" The ninja fukutaicho raised his blade...

And felt Zaraki's fingertips on his forehead.

After that, it all went kind of fuzzy...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"So, how are the patients doing?" Unohana was just doing her job. Daily grind, fairly typical.

"Most of our patients are Eleventh Division. Zaraki-taicho seems to have set up a new, even worse training regimen."

"I see. Are there any failed experiments from Twelfth Division?"

"No, taicho. I made sure everyone was clear with the new policy you instituted. If any of Kurotsuchi-taicho's experiments go wrong, and the subjects arrive here, we will notify you immediately, no matter how trivial the side effects appear to be."

They both thought back to the unfortunates who each grew several extra arms out of their faces, in the Fourth Division Headquarters, twelve years ago.

"I'm glad to hear..."

BAASH!

"What the fuck!?" Unohana-taicho had to be kind of startled to talk that way, but Kotetsu didn't even notice.

They looked at Soifon-taicho, who had been kind enough to... drop by.

"Kotetsu-san, prepare a table for immediate surgery!"

She rushed to obey the order.

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Zaraki pulled his fingers away, and watched as the ninja fell at his feet.

"So, anyone else?"

Nobody else seemed to want to fight him...

"Wow. Don't worry, it isn't really your fault. The plan was probably for you to trust to the taicho to do most of the work, and help 'em dogpile me, right?"

Nobody answered. That probably meant "yes."

"But then I took down the taicho, and proved I couldn't get dogpiled." Just to make sure he couldn't be, he let his idle reiatsu draw in electrons, so that, if he couldn't handle a dogpile (which he was almost sure he could, 99%) he could pull an omni-directional Gian, and win that way. "Tell you what... If you all leave now, I'll just do the same."

No one moved, but he could tell they were all tempted.

"Nobody?"

Nobody answered.

"Look, I want you to fight me, it'll be fun, don't get me wrong, but maybe you guys should just leave. That way, I get to get out faster, and you can tell everyone how scary I am! AND you guys don't die. Everyone wins!"

Finally, one of them spoke.

"For Soifon-taicho!"

He charged, as did every single one of his friends.

"Oh well. Dumbasses."

Yachiru jumped onto a wall to watch.

One of them noticed this, and jumped onto the wall as well.

"Yachiru-fukutaicho, you are to..."

A pink-cat-looking aura of reiatsu appeared. She could have pulled an even better effect by transforming her arm, but she could intimidate most rank-and-files with her old powers...

"I'm watching. Don't bother me."

He decided to obey. If he'd done anything else, she'd probably have just fried him...

She watched as Kenpachi sent his blades into the nineteenth victim.

About twelve had hit him, but thanks to his immense power, they'd gotten injured instead of him.

He grinned as he mowed them down, too...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Okay, well, we're back..." Hitsugaya heard soft moaning from his arms...

_Oh, shit!_

"Shiro-chan?" Hinamori blinked sleepily. "Why are you holding me?"

_Crap crap kuso!_

**A lot of explaining to do, huh?**

**My inspiration's gone, so, Merry Christmas!**

**Please review.**


	48. Escape

**Disclaimer: I don't think I own Bleach. I'm not really sure, though...**

"So, you're awake!" Matsumoto was trying to imitate her normal, cheerful, seemingly dense and carefree manner.

It wasn't working.

"What's wrong, Matsumoto-san?"

_CRAP!_

"Nothing!" Her forced smile was even more painfully obvious now. "I mean, you were hit during the fight, before Central 46 made us leave, and we thought you'd rather wake up in a bed! Isn't it cute how Toshiro-chan carried you?"

It was a mark of how serious the situation was that neither of them blushed. Hitsugaya gently lowered her onto the ground.

"There's something wrong. I know it." Hinamori looked around. "Where Aizen-taicho and Kurotsuchi-taicho? And Kurotsuchi-fukutaicho?"

Hitsugaya raised his hand.

"I think you might have a concussion. How many fingers am I holding up?" He raised his pointer.

"One, now..."

"Good." He opened his hand, and let his power overwhelm Hinamori, knocking her back out.

Miyamoto watched calmly.

"You know, we are going to have to tell her eventually."

Hitsugaya grimaced. "Someone is. But it'll have to be an expert of mental health. Someone capable of minimizing the damage it will do to her."

"Do we have anyone like that? Fourth Division's good, but this is going to fuck Momo up..." (Matsumoto looking concerned. Try and picture it.)

Yumichika was getting really pale by now. "If we do, it will be Unohana-taicho. If not..."

"Have any of you ever heard about 'Weekend at Bernie's'?" Rangiku was trying very hard to look like her normal self. It was even worse than before. "It's a mortal movie that might help us!"

They all had.

"That... won't work." Hitsugaya picked her back up. "Unohana-taicho's our only hope."

**Authors Note: I only watched a couple of minutes of said movie, but I hear it's pretty funny.**

**You really won't get the joke unless you've at least heard of it...**

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Zaraki lowered his blade as the last enemy fell.

He walked over to the unconscious ninja fukutaicho, and checked his pulse. Still alive, but he'd be out for about an hour longer.

He then walked over to Tosen Kaname, and checked him.

"Dead." He called up to Yachiru.

She jumped down.

"So, you're letting the fukutaicho live?"

"Yeah. I want a couple of survivors. That can include him," Zaraki nodded to the remaining ninja "as long as he doesn't do anything stupid."

The ninja looked at all of his friends. Some of the best ninja Seireitei had ever seen, and they were now street pizza.

"I think I want to live. But if I don't attack you, they'll think I was on your side..."

Zaraki jumped over to the wall the ninja was standing on.

"Hey, wait!"

Zaraki flicked on the forehead.

He flew back a couple dozen yards, and landed on a street.

He was out before he landed.

"That shouldn't be life threatening. Okay, now we need to go to West 3. A noble family there's been asked to help us escape. Without their help, we'll probably be tracked."

Yachiru looked at him.

"So, this is all because of my powers?"

"Yeah. They think you did something wrong to get them."

"I know that, but... do you really need to come with me?"

"Yeah. Not only do I need to stick with you, I'm the only one who knows where we're going. **And**, where we're going, we'll be on the frontline for a war!"

"Ear-to-ear" doesn't really capture how Yachiru's grin looked. "Where's that?"

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo----Flashback---xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"If you have to leave, don't use their gates. They can track you that way." Kensei thought back to his own escape. He was glad he'd known this...

"I know. But how do I leave, then?"

"You use a senkaimon the shinigami don't own. That way, they can't track you." Kisuke sighed. "Not the Shihouin gate, they'll make sure to keep an eye on that one."

Zaraki groaned. "Please tell me you can get another one for me."

"Yeah. I know another noble family, who I told everything I know, but who don't have any obvious ties with me. They'll get you out, if you need them to, as long as you can make sure you aren't followed."

"How do I do that?"

Urahara thought for a second...

"I got it."

"What?"

"Untraceable gigai. I'll leave them in West 3, with the Shiba family. They don't have a senkaimon anymore, but they can do that much... After that, go to the Zankiri mansion in West 2."

"And these'll work?" Zaraki knew Urahara was a genius, but restricting Goraishi was a tall order...

"They should."

"Great..."

Zaraki turned to face the odds.

"One more thing..." Urahara put his hand on Zaraki's sleeve, to delay him.. "If they try to arrest you, **don't** turn yourself in. No matter what the arresting officers say, there is **no** hope for justice at this point! Central 46 has been compromised!"

Zaraki raised an eyebrow, or at least where one should have been. "So?"

"So, there's no longer any hope for justice!"

Zaraki's nonexistent eyebrow would have been in his hair, if it was there. "There was before? Are we still talkin' about Central 46, here?"

Urahara shrugged. "They've gotten worse!"

"Is that possible? We all know it's impossible to be an aristocrat anymore, unless your family has at least two in their pockets! Well, Kuchiki doesn't count, he could buy 'em all, but he's got too much pride..."

Urahara decided there was no point in leaving him in the dark.

"They've all been killed and replaced by imposters, who want to destroy all of Seireitei!"

A lesser man's jaw would have dropped. Zaraki just took it in stride.

"That _is_ a little worse. Okay, I'll be careful."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo----End Flashback---xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"What the **FUCK** do you mean Unohana-taicho is '_**occupied**_'!?" Hitsugaya could be kind of touchy about Hinamori's needs...

"I mean she's trying to help save Soifon-taicho!" Iemura was really hoping to get Hitsugaya to see sense. He didn't want to get frozen.

"Soifon-taicho?! She wasn't even _in _the material world!"

"She was injured by Zaraki-taicho. She'd had died if she hadn't landed in our HQ. It looks like he's turned coat. He's killed Tosen-taicho, too..."

"What!? No freakin' way!"

Matsumoto groaned. _Oh fuck. Why now?_

She decided to try to get her friend help, the only way she could.

"Well, I guess our friend's in some trouble then. There's no way anyone except Unohana-taicho could help her..."

He glanced down at Hinamori. "She doesn't look injured."

Hitsugaya rolled his eyes. "Look, her taicho just died..."

"So?"

Matsumoto leaned forward. "That man was her whole life. We need someone to gently break it to her. She'll snap if we tell her."

"Really? Look..."

The door opened. Unohana came out, and dropped onto a chair.

"Unohana-taicho?"

"Yes, Hitsugaya-taicho?"

"Did you hear about the mission to the material world?"

"Yes, they said a taicho died..."

"It was Aizen-taicho."

Unohana probably would have thought he was joking, except Hitsugaya never jokes. Ever.

"How's Hinamori taking it?"

Hitsugaya hesitated.

"We think she'll have a breakdown when we tell her."

Unohana grimaced.

"I assume you want someone to break it to her? Someone who can help her mind stay in one piece?"

"Yeah. We have no idea how to do it..."

"I'll try. But first, I need a rest. Kotetsu-fukutaicho and I just almost died trying to stop Soifon from giving out."

"Is it true?"

"What I just said, or that Tosen-taicho is dead?" They all looked at her. "I know you've heard by now, or you'd be asking what happened to Soifon-taicho."

"The part about Tosen-taicho."

Unohana closed her eyes. "Yes. My men pronounced him dead on scene. We think Zaraki's power reflected one of his attacks." She got up, her eyes still closed. She turned to Iemura. "Keep her out until I wake up. I need a long rest first, and we don't need her waking up alone, wondering what's going on."

Miyamoto spoke up for the first time since entering the HQ. "How's Soifon-taicho?"

Unohana leaned on the desk for support. "In Critical condition, but she should pull through. Kotetsu-fukutaicho and I did all the hard procedures."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"SHINIGAMI!!!"

The two ex-soldiers looked at the boar-riding apparition with disinterested expressions.

Kenpachi figured he might as well try it. "Are you Shiba Ganju?"

This seemed only to encourage him. "YESI I **AM** Shiba Ganju! The number one shinigami hater in all of Rukongai!"

"I see. So, that would mean that helping criminals escape from them is hardly outside of your routine?"

This left him looking dumbfounded.

"Wh-what?"

Kenpachi sighed.

"I was told that you'd left your manor in Rukongai 3 West, but that you'd probably be here to wreck the place, and I could get the new address. I'm the criminal your sister will probably be expecting."

Ganju was barely able to talk. "What'd you do?" _(_**Please**_ don't say murder!)_

"Nothing at first, but I had to get rough to get away from the assholes. I'm almost sure I killed Kaname Tosen."

**Please review.**


	49. What Happens to Snitches

"HALT! WHO GOES THERE!?" Two voices sounded out in unison. They sounded... lame.

"It's me!" Ganju Shiba sounded a little shaken, for once. He kept casting frightened looks at the incredible hulk standing beside him.

It didn't take a genius to figure out what was shaking him.

"YOU! WHO ARE YOU!?"

"I'm the ex-taicho I think your boss is expecting."

"LIAR!"

"It's okay, boys. Kisuke called ahead. These two are cool." Shiba Kukaku walked out of the small, but still obviously expensive house, with an unsettlingly wide smile on her face. "Welcome to my humble abode."

The two guests looked up at the two expensive looking giant stone arms holding a sign above the house.

"Thanks." Kenpachi decided to cut to the chase. "So, you got 'em?"

"Yeah. These should be able to get you away from here untraced."

"Thanks. We should get going as soon as we get into these. We don't want to draw attention to you guys..."

"YEAH! GET **GOING, **_**MURDERER**__!"_

Ganju screamed in pain and fear as a wooden prosthetic came down on his head.

"**HELP!** **I'M **_**BEING**__** MURDERED**__**!"**_

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Kensei sent his leg into Sora's chest. The unfortunate lesser vizard flew backwards a couple dozen yards.

His mask shattered as Kensei released his own.

"Stop using that new attack. It doesn't work."

Sora got up slowly.

"It could be powerful, if I could just pull it off."

Kensei decided he may as well consider it. "How powerful?"

Sora considered for a second.

"I think if I can get it down, it should be powerful enough to bring a taicho down, even if they aren't being restricted. Maybe kill them. It's basically a short range ametralladora, but it takes less reiatsu, and deals more damage at the range it's meant for."

Kensei sealed his weapon.

"You have two days before I start sparring with you again. If you don't have it down by then, you have to work with it on your own time, not mine."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Okay, so why'd you call me here?" Ichigo looked around the huge training area under the shop.

"Well, you remember the fighting at your school?" Urahara generally had a goofy looking grin on his face. Whenever it was gone, it meant something scary was going on.

And Ichigo couldn't find a grin anywhere on his face.

"You fought admirably. Don't think for a second that you didn't. The soldiers we were facing were from Seireitei's elite. To fight anywhere near their level with so little training as you've had is amazing."

"Okay, so what's the problem? If that was their best..." He noticed Urahara's mood turn grimmer.

"I said they were elite. I never said they don't have better. Those six taicho were very close to the top end, but they still have three taicho who are even more powerful." Ichigo paled. "You are nowhere near their level. You are going to need a lot more training, and even that might not be enough."

If there was any blood left in Ichigo's face before Urahara's warning, there wasn't after.

"So, what now?"

"We hope this training is enough. As a first step, I'd like to make arrangements to have you and Ishida-san pulled out of school, to devote more time to training. Your father will not interfere, and neither will Ishida-san's. They both understand the situation, perhaps better than either of you do."

"My father? What do you..."

"Your powers aren't a freak accident, Kurosaki-san, and neither are Ishida-san's. They're hereditary."

"So, my father?"

"Is a retired shinigami taicho. His power is almost level with the Thirteenth and Eight Division taicho."

"Thirteenth and Eighth?"

"Those two are stronger than any other taicho, except for the First Division's. They are also more likely to be deployed to fight than the First Division taicho."

"And Ishida-san's father?"

"Do you remember the white haired man who appeared with Rukia at Karakura High?"

Ichigo's jaw dropped. "Him?"

He remembered watching the white haired man fight. He was clearly human, and yet able to hold his own against taicho level opponents. "So, does that mean, Ishida-san can learn to fight like that?"

"Yes. That's what I'm hoping. If he doesn't there might be problems. We need all the powerful fighters we can get our hands on."

"Got it. How hard is this training going to be?"

"I'm basically going to run you through every shinigami technique type except kido. You're already beyond the level of most taicho in destruction path, and there is no way those two would have gotten out of that binding spell without you releasing it or the First Division taicho breaking it."

"Is the First Division taicho really that scary?"

"No. He's worse."

"So, if he shows up?"

"We're fucked."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"So, it's you two?"

"Yes. You are the Zankiri doorkeeper?"

"Yes. You are the disgraced Eleventh Division brass?"

"Yes."

"Were you followed?"

"Yes, but he's just a fly. One moment."

_Oh, **SHIT!**_

Renji watched in horror as a pink cat-looking aura of reiatsu appeared in front of him.

"Hi, Red-Pineapple Head!"

"Hey, Abarai, what are you doing here?"

"I... I... I..."

"What is it, Abarai?"

"I don't suppose you'd believe I was getting a pair of sunglasses?"

"Seeing as it takes you half a year to save up for one, and it's only been two months, no. Besides, I know you buy them from a store in South Rukongai 1. This is West 2."

"Yeah, you should be careful. I've heard there's an ex-taicho who was convicted of making illegal technology who uses the West Districts as a base of operations in Rukongai..."

"Well, who do you think arranged my ticket out of this dimension?"

"So, you're leaving this dimension?"

"Yes."

"And you have some way of doing it without getting tracked."

"Yeah."

"And I'm the only person who knows this, other than your associates?"

"Yep."

_I am so fucked._

"So..." Renji started trying to walk backwards without making it obvious.

"So, if you snitch, there'll be problems for me and Yachiru."

"Yeah, I guess..."

He tried to shunpo away, but found Zaraki's hand gripping the back of his uniform.

**Please review.**


	50. MINDFREAK!

**This is a long one.**

**At least, for me.**

"What was that?" Rin looked at where the blip on the radar had been. Actually, not a blip. It had been.. what seemed like all the spirit energy being redirected into the center of the phenomenon.

Akon looked at where the blip on the radar had been.

"What was what?"

"You didn't see it, Akon-san?"

"No." He was wondering if he'd missed something important. He was kind of distracted, thinking how that noble had checked himself out against their... "advice."

Akon had actually allowed an experiment to get up and go home. Kurotsuchi-taicho was going to fuck him up...

No logic, no excuses. Akon was getting a footprint tattooed on his ass for this...

"I'd say, probably nothing." _I hope._

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Achoo."

Somehow, this poster-child of the nobility was able to maintain dignity while sneezing.

"Are you well, Kuchiki-sama?"

"Yes, for someone who just came back to life. Now, do you understand my instructions?"

"Yes, Kuchiki-sama."

"Repeat them to me."

"Kuchiki-sama?"

"Repeat my instructions, so that I may be certain you understand them."

"Forgive me." He said quickly. "You are going to rest in your room for the next few days, coming out only to eat. You are only to be disturbed if the soutaicho himself arrives. Messengers will be laughed at as they are shown the door."

"Correct. Thank you."

Byakuya closed the door behind him. The servant decided to stay close to the door, just out of curiosity.

A minute or two later, he felt a sinking sensation in the pit of his soul. The servant had tried and failed to become a shinigami, he knew when high level kido was going on.

He burst into the room just in time to see the box form. He felt his master's power spike for a millisecond before whatever was inside it got eviscerated. And eviscerated again. And then made to resemble the Swiss cheese his master's parents were so partial to.

The servant had just dropped to his knees in amazement when a final blade appeared.

It shot through the coffin, and stopped a fraction of a nanometer from the servants nose.

"Did I not make perfectly clear that I was not to be disturbed?"

"Forgivemeforgivemeforgivemeforgivemeforgivemeforgiveme..."

That would have gone on for quite some time, had Byakuya-taicho not finally said: "Don't do it again. Here is my scarf, I'd rather you held onto it for a while. Please leave now."

"HAI!"

The servant quickly retreated, but remembered to close the door behind him.

Byakuya looked at the bust of his image that he'd used as target practice.

He then decided to try something basic, to test his improvements.

"Hado: Number Four... White Lightning."

A large burst of electrified air shot through the window.

"Hado: Number Four... White Lightning."

The same result.

Maybe...

"Hado: Number Four... _**White Lightning**_."

He attempted to focus it into his hand, in a spiral shape.

He held it for a couple of seconds, before it finally exploded.

_If I can improve that technique, I might be able to..._

Byakuya was annoyed, though not surprised, to find the same servant rushing into his room. He also wasn't surprised to see his guards rush in as well.

The servant looked at what was left of Kuchiki Byakuya's outfit.

"Yes, that _was_ why I gave you my scarf."

He examined the remains of his room.

"Maybe I should practice this somewhere else."

It was then that he felt something strange in Rukongai...

"Did any of you feel that?"

One of the guards nodded, hesitatingly. "I might have felt something..."

"Go to the Division HQ, tell them to be ready at the West Gate. I'm going to check."

He grabbed the scarf, and vanished.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"_**HE**_-uuummmph!"

"Don't scream so loud, Abarai. Someone might hear you."

Zaraki pulled him inside, as he kicked, and tried to scream.

He also tried to bite, but with the vicegrip Zaraki had on his jaw, that wasn't really a viable option.

The kicks should have had some effect, seeing as Zaraki was quite clearly in a gigai.

"Man, this thing's practically indestructible."

"Well, it's supposed to hide _your_ reiatsu, it's kind of gonna have to be!"

"Okay, nobody can hear, so I think I can let you speak..."

"YOU SONUVABITCH!"

He reached for Zabimaru as Zaraki released him...

And ran into a barrier on his blade.

"AHH!! Asshole!"

"I apologize, shinigami-san..." Renji turned, and saw the doorman, with his fingers still woven together in the sign that created the barrier.

"Fuck you. Fuck you both!"

"So, you don't want to hear me explaining myself?" Zaraki looked... hurt, almost.

"Well, I'm kind of curious..."

"Okay. First... we didn't do it."

...

...

...

...

"Do what?"

Zaraki's nonexistent eyebrow raised again. "You haven't heard?"

"No."

"Okay. Yachiru's suspected of having used forbidden technology to increase her power."

...

...

...

...

"No kidding?"

"Nope! They think I'm a crook!"

...

"They think you need to use forbidden techniques?"

"Yup!"

...

...

...

Renji's voice returned. "They need to lay off the pot."

"The... what?"

"Pot. Mortals use it to feel good. It's like sake, except it works better, it's illegal in America, and there's more ways to use it. People drink it, smoke it, make it into confections... Oh, and it's harder to get addicted to pot than sake. And it's harder to overdose on..."

"I gotta get back to you on that... Okay. So, you see why we're leaving."

"I don't see why you came back here."

"Neither do we!" Yachiru burst into giggles at her own wit.

"We were giving these assholes a chance. Maybe we shouldn't have."

"No. If you are suspected criminals, you should not have given us a chance."

They all turned to see Kuchiki Byakuya standing in the doorway.

"Byakuya-taicho!!"

His hands ran through a couple of gestures. A barrier shot up around the manor, and completely cut off any hope of people outside the mansion hearing, seeing, or feeling anything that happened inside.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"**OW,_ FUCK!"_**

_Did it explode again, Your Majesty?_

_Go fuck yourself, Acidwire..._

"Well, no doubt it's a powerful technique..."

Sora was a little surprised to see Yadomaru Lisa looking at something that wasn't pornographic...

And a little embarrassed that it had to be his shredded hand!

"It's nothing!"

"It looks like it's more than that... though not by much. It looks like Swiss Cheese." Sora looked up to see Hachigen standing over him, with a barrier forming in his hand.

He held up his own hand, or what was left of it, and the barrier formed around the wound. The hand was back in half a second.

"Tell me it didn't explode again."

They looked up to see Kensei standing behind them, shaking his head.

"Why are you even bothering?"

He just got up, and raised his hand again.

Yadomaru turned, and raised her book. "I can't watch."

He yelled the name of the attack.

_**BANG!**_

"_**OW! FUCK!!"**_

"Well, at least this time, you only got two holes in your hand..."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"So, Abarai. What are you doing here?"

"I thought I felt his reiatsu in West 3. I thought he'd probably vanish while I was following 'standard procedures,' so I came alone. I followed them to a bar, where some weirdo Shiba guy took him, got him these gigai. I confronted him outside of the mansion, and he said he'd found a way to move between dimensions without being tracked."

"The private senkaimon in this household?"

Zaraki nodded.

"I see. And the reason you confronted him instead of coming to find me?"

"Well..."

"Well?"

"Well... they sensed me."

"I see. So, it was more them confronting you?"

"Yeah, pretty much."

"Okay. Now, how were you able to hide your reiatsu so well, Zaraki-taicho?"

"I put a lot of effort into it, and I got these gigai from my new acquaintance. It's the funny kind of gigai that Twelfth Division can't trace."

"I see. I assume you obtained these by consorting with Urahara Kisuke?"

Zaraki shrugged. "Yeah." His standard "I-gives-a-fuck" expression still adorned his face. "He gave 'em to me after I figured out I might need to escape here."

"'Might' need to escape?"

"Yeah. We weren't sure if they were really trying to arrest us, or if anyone was stupid enough to volunteer."

"I admit I would not have enjoyed the task. So, if you manage to escape, what are your plans?"

"Well, Kisuke told me there was going to be fighting where I was going..."

"Karakura town?"

Zaraki gave him a flat look. "I wouldn't tell you if I knew."

"I see. Are these opponents going to be shinigami?"

"No way you actually think I'll tell the truth."

Byakuya shrugged. "I had assumed you didn't realize lying would be expedient."

"That's a stupid assumption to make. But lying isn't going to help me... I know you'll never find me where I'm going..."

"That's all you can tell me?"

"Hai."

"I understand." Byakuya glanced at the mortal-made clock on the wall.

"That only leaves why I should let you go."

"'Let' isn't the word here, Byakuya."

Kuchiki ignored the purposeful rudeness, and continued.

_I should arrest them. It would be justice._

_As would allowing your comrades to kill your sister._ Byakuya wanted to groan as the familiar, contemptuous voice of his zanpakuto questioned him yet again.

_She violated the law._

_Did you ask why?_

_It doesn't matter._

_Why doesn't it matter?_

_It doesn't matter why. The law is absolute._

_If a law can be absolute, it shouldn't be so completely inflexible. It should be able to cover __**any **__situation justly._

_Ours does._

Byakuya suddenly realized why he had always given this answer. Why he had always insisted to his sword that Seireitei's law was perfect.

He had been trying to convince himself.

He had been trying to convince himself that what he had wanted to do so badly was disgustingly wrong, so that he wouldn't feel obliged to bow to his desires.

So that he could persuade himself that he shouldn't obey his wife's dying wish.

So that he could persuade himself that he shouldn't protect his sister.

_**Damn** you, Mayuri! What the **hell**** have you**** done to me**?!_

_Maybe you should rethink your ideas of justice... master-sama.*_

_Now even my sword doesn't respect me... Okay, you win._

"If you can persuade me to allow you to leave within fifteen minutes, I will leave you unharmed, and say I found nothing. If you try to escape without my permission, or if you fail to convince me to leave, I will attack."

Renji's jaw hit the floor.

"You're... serious?"

"I am starting to rethink some of my earlier positions. I would imagine that it is due to whatever strange potion it was that Kurotsuchi-fukutaicho injected into my spine."

"Tell 'im I said thanks. Okay... why shouldn't you let us go?"

_**Begin Debate++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++**_

"Because the law says that I should capture you."

"Think you're up to it?"

"I couldn't say. I can think of a way to find out, of course."

Zaraki snorted.

Byakuya paused.

"If you wish to help either side, Abarai-fukutaicho, you have my permission. I will not penalize you after the argument concludes, no matter which side you pick or by what points you attempt to aid that particular view."

Renji's jaw, which he had just picked up, dropped again.

He quickly picked it up.

"Is that really you, taicho?"

"To an extent. I would like to think that whatever changes I am going through are positive changes. I meant every word I have since I have entered this building. In fact, I cannot remember the last lie I spoke."

_That was a **lie**, Byakuya._

_That is a family affair, and part of my promise to Hisana._

_Whatever, just keep going._

"Okay. So... the law is the only reason you're trying to arrest Zaraki-taicho?"

"Is it not sufficient?"

"It should be, but... is the law fair?"

"Is it not? Forbidden techniques are forbidden for a reason, Abarai-fukutaicho. Gaining hollow powers would be an **incredibly **dangerous proposition. Central 46 is right to have forbidden these procedures." Byakuya was kind of wondering where this was going.

"I know, but, how do we know that's where Yachiru's powers came from?"

"How do we know that they did not come from such a procedure? Surely the matter must be investigated."

"Yeah, but, is Central 46 going to do it fairly? We all know they're a bunch of corrupt bastards. All you need is enough money, and you've got a vote. Hell, a man with your wealth could get himself made dictator. Maybe you should try it: with your new mind, you'd be better than we've got now."

Byakuya was about to point out that, as long as they were not paid, they might be fair, or that Zaraki might even bribe them. The fact was, whoever it who had paid them might even approve of Zaraki's performance as a soldier. Then, Zaraki himself spoke.

"Kisuke told me Central 46 is dead. Apparently, they got wiped out and replaced by imposters. Normally I wouldn't mind, but he says these guys are part of a conspiracy to wipe out Seireitei."

"If that is true, I would imagine he is part of it."

"Nah, 'e says he and the vizard are trying ta' stop it."

"And we know this is true?"

"I can generally tell when someone's not on the level. Case in point: I wouldn't trust Gin, if I was you. I got the same impression about Tosen and _maybe _Aizen, but they're both dead, so don't worry. Their fukutaicho are all okay, except Hinamori's a little unstable."

"Are those the only shinigami you would have me distrust?"

"Well, since you ask, I don't really trust any of the gatekeepers, except the West guy, Jidanbo. He trained with my division, so I know him pretty well. He's on the level."

"They are some of our most trusted warriors! You, a criminal, think yourself more trustworthy than they are?!"

"I was defending someone, my fukutaicho at that, from execution for something she **didn't do**. And are you telling me you **do** trust them?"

Byakuya opened his mouth to speak, and then remembered his unconscious preference for using the West gate...

**Today's my birthday!**

**Some reviews would be nice...**

**I _know_ you guys are going to have some thoughts on these developments.**

*** the suffix "sama" can be used to express the highest level of respect, or to insult someone by saying that they are stuck-up. Guess which here?**


	51. Agreement

"Well? No way you actually trust that Ichimaru bastard." Zaraki was actually smirking for once, rather than the usual smile-from-hell.

**(Author's note: Don't waste time trying to imagine it. It is a completely out-of-place look for him, but he probably would be at this point.)**

"I doubt anyone besides Matsumoto-fukutaicho and Izuru-fukutaicho truly trust him. But there has never been any evidence of wrongdoing."

"Well, true. But surely you noticed the way he always makes small talk with ya?"

"Is that illegal?"

"No, but you know why he does, right?"

Byakuya paused. "I have suspected that I know the reason. I noticed he normally speaks to me only when he has a reason, and that he only makes small talk when my younger sister is walking with me. Do you believe I'm close?"

"Yeah. That guy's a sadistic creep. He has less business running a division than I did."

"Because of one idiosyncrasy? You are clutching at straws, Zaraki." He hadn't forgotten the rank, he'd omitted it out of exasperation, but Zaraki didn't seem to notice. "We have no idea why he made small talk. We suspect, but we have no proof."

"You can't prove Yachiru did anything, either."

"She has suspect abilities, that cannot be explained any other way."

"Her soul was trying to get control of an immense amount of alien reiatsu that I accidentally sent through her."

"And you expect me to believe that?"

"No. I was just hoping you would so I wouldn't have to _splatter you all over the __**walls**_." Zaraki's voice began to get louder as he spoke the last six words, and he reached for a gikongan dispenser.

"_Was that a __threat__, Kenpachi_?" Byakuya put his hand on Senbonzakura's hilt.

"_No, it was a fact, __**Byakuya**_." He pulled out the Chappy-box...

"Okay, that's enough!" Renji decided that it wouldn't do to tear apart such an expensive looking house.

"My apologies, Abarai-fukutaicho. Did you have anything salient to add? I'd rather hear it than any unfounded accusation this barbarian has to offer." His hand left Senbonzakura. Renji sighed in relief.

"Well, first off, I really don't trust Ichimaru-taicho either. I don't know about Aizen-taicho, or Tosen-taicho, but..."

"Have you any proof?"

"If I did, we wouldn't be calling him 'taicho' anymore..."

"My sentiments exactly." Byakuya's voice became darker as thought about the pained looks on his sister's face during those "conversations."

"Well, what about the gatekeepers?"

"We have no proof of wrongdoing to implicate them, either."

"Yeah, but, now that I think about it, there's just something about the North, South, and East gatekeepers... I don't know. I know you avoid them, too. One time, you took your family servants on a longer route just to use the West Gate instead of the North."

"It doesn't matter. We were digressing either way. The issue at hand isn't their trustworthiness, it is Zaraki's, and to a lesser extent, Urahara's."

"Oh, yeah! Sorry... the thing is, I worked under these two. They wouldn't get involved in something like this. They're too proud of their powers, they'd consider it cheating."

"Yeah, I kind of don't like these powers. I have 'em now, but I don't think I'm going to use them much."

"It surprises me, as well. But then, Kyoraku's own fukutaicho participated in such experiments..."

"Nanao-fukutaicho?!" Renji's jaw dropped again. "No freakin' way!"

"No, the one before that. Yadomaru Lisa. It was back when I first got this job, back before Byakuya was even a shinigami."

"I remember my grandfather was surprised. He didn't think she was capable of such betrayal. It surprised everyone. Given this surprise, I don't know why we should rule out the possibility that these two might have done the same."

"Look... that's ancient history..."

"Not ancient, even by human standards. There are still mortals living on Earth who were alive back then. Not a large number, but you understand my point, I am sure. At any rate, there _are_ lessons to be gained from history, even thousands of years ago. It is true of humans, it is true of shinigami."

"At any rate, we are accomplishing nothing. How about this... I agree to let you leave here, but in exchange, you tell me where you are going, in case I should like to know. I will steer the investigation away from that area, to whatever extent is safe. However, if I find you are hostile towards Seireitei, I will personally lead an attack force to take you dead or alive. I will prefer dead."

"I already told ya, I don't know. I was told where the gigai where, and where to find the senkaimon. I don't know exactly where it leads, okay?"

"You have no idea where you are going?"

"Probably Karakura Town, but for all I know it could be Argentina. Well known hiding place for scumbags, right?"

"Argentina? I had no idea you were as evil as the criminals in hiding there. Oh well. So, you conjecture Karakura Town, but have no real knowledge. Very well. I warn you though, I will not be able to steer the investigation away from you, with such little information. I could try to steer the investigation away from Karakura, but that would be impossible to hide, not when the town is certain to be under heavy surveillance."

"It would be easy you to lose yourself that way, as well. Such little information makes my deal worthless. I could, however, put a tracking spell on you, that you could remove when you reach your destination. That would be all the information I would need."

"To do what? Help me, or arrest me?"

"Whichever is just."

"Yeah, because nobles don't do anything to help their public image, and they're the most trustworthy people in the world."

"I see. Well, then. I suppose you had best convince me to release you. I shall waive the time limit. You may have as long as you like, as long as I do not become convinced you should be arrested."

"Good. So, then. You're not sure I can judge character the way I say?"

"I am not certain that they are trustworthy. I am also not certain that that helps your case."

"Well, I only brought that up because..."

"Why'd I bring that up?"

Renji thought for a second...

"Oh yeah. Zaraki-taicho wanted to prove he could tell who was cool and who wasn't so it meant something when he said he trusted Urahara to be a good guy. That mattered because Urahara was the guy Zaraki-taicho was staying with, and it'd look bad if he was a bad guy."

"I see. This only matters if we assume you are trustworthy. If you are not, Urahara could be as loyal to Seireitei as Soifon-taicho, but you might kill him."

"You can trust me."

"That is what we are attempting to establish."

"Yeah, but come on! Abarai trusts me..."

"That is only to be expected. Abarai-fukutaicho has all the loyalty of a dog."

"What?!"

"Do you deny it?"

"Uh, eh...No."

"Good. I think now we see why the fact that Abarai-fukutaicho trusts you does not require me to."

"Okay, you got us. I guess we can't prove you should trust us."

"Are you going to attempt to bargain with me, or are you going to fight?"

"Which one gets us a better chance of leaving without getting hurt, or drawing attention on our gracious hosts?"

"I do not intend to allow you to bargain. That leaves fighting. The barrier should hide our reiatsu, until I am killed or incapacitated."

"Oh, come on. Isn't there anythin'... Could you try to get an audience with Central 46?"

"What would that prove?"

"You could check to see if they'r imposters."

Byakuya's fingers snapped together. "Of course. We could use the opportunity to attempt to get your case and Urahara's re-investigated."

"Urahara's? Don't worry there. He got set up good. The only way he's getting cleared is if someone turns states."

"What do you mean?"

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo----Flashback---xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"So, how long these imposters been set up?"

"They only recently began their work. Up until now, the ringleader's been counting on doctored evidence to remove his enemies."

"How thorough is he?"

"An American Court could inject me with the evidence he used... of course, I did do some of it, but I got cold feet before it got anywhere near as bad as he wanted it to look. I figured out the theory, but I didn't actually turn anyone: I took some cell cultures from myself and Hiyori-san, and the results scared me into dropping the project. The ringleader was the one who turned my friends. As for Tessai, he had nothing to do with it. He was just in the wrong place at the wrong time."

He gave a guilty feeling grin. "I could have done it better than he did, too. Weird thing to be proud of, I guess..."

"Gotcha. 'Nd who is this 'ringleader?'"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"I'm pretty good at taking harsh blows... You should see the cut I got getting my job."

"Okay, it was Aizen-taicho."

Zaraki's eyebrows went up higher than ever.

"What... No bullshit?"

"No bullshit."

"Well, I knew he was too good to be true but... god-damn."

"Well, think anyone else'll buy it?"

"No. I'll tell 'em not to trust 'im if it comes up, but... shit! Good thing he's dead..."

Urahara and Kensei shared a look.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo----Flashback Ends---xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Well, it's true he did some experiments, but he stopped at cell cultures. He never did it to the extent he was convicted of, and Tessai was completely innocent."

"I see. Well, the case against Tessai was weak already, but Central 46 refused to look into it, especially not after he escaped."

"In any case, I would like to dispatch my men to investigate, if we are agreed that we will attempt this recourse?"

"If it'll get me out of here without having to draw any attention, sure."

"Sounds like you've done a 180! Maybe Red Pineapple-head can look at your sister without you castrating him now!"

Neither Byakuya nor his subordinate cared to respond to that outburst.

**Please review.**


	52. Scientist Soup

"So, what are you goin' to tell your pals?"

"I have been investigating your escape, and one of my informants (it is not important which one) has uncovered evidence that Central 46 has been compromised. I will ask that they investigate it. If this investigation turns up nothing..."

"You'll try to arrest me."

"I think I have a compromise. I tell them that you fought me to buy time for Yachiru's escape. When you are arrested, I inform the other taicho of your accusation and ask that it be investigated."

"If that doesn't work?"

"It will."

"You're sure?"

"Making the head of the investigative division rich beyond his wildest dreams won't even make a dent in my wealth."

"I see. And you're assuming that this will work out?"

"Another escape will be difficult to accomplish, even for you."

"I'll do it anyway."

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Are we agreed on the first step?"

"Sure."

"Very well. Stay in those gigai. I will need to lower the barrier to contact my men."

"Got it."

"Black and white net. Twenty-two bridges, sixty-six crowns and belts. Footprints, distant thunder, sharp peak, engulfing land, hidden in the night, sea of clouds, blue line. Form a circle and fly through the heavens. Bakudo: Number 77... Heavenly Ricksaws in Silken Air."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Holy fucking _**shit!"**_

"Wow. This is... alarming."

"Central 46 is _splattered all over the __**fucking**__ floor, and all you can say is __**"alarming!?**_**"**

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Farewell, Zaraki-san."

"Not 'taicho' anymore?"

"I doubt anyone will call you that for a long time. Do you think Madarame-san will handle the division well?"

"For as long as he needs to. They'll find a new taicho soon enough."

"Playing the fool, Zaraki-san?"

"So you could tell. I was wondering. Or did Abarai rat?"

"What!?"

"I could simply tell."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"_Attention. This is an emergency muster call for all remaining taicho of the Thirteen Court Guardian divisions. Unohana-taicho is exempt, her medical duties are, at the moment, a more pressing concern._

Byakuya decided to see how much trouble he got in for this...

Ichimaru was sort of distressed to hear Yamamoto calling an emergency meeting.

_Could he know?_

Hitsugaya groaned. "What now?"

If he only knew...

Unohana was glad that she at least could keep working, though she was wondering what she was going to miss.

Komamura just started walking.

Kyouraku heard "emergency muster call" and realized that this was probably too important to miss, no matter how much he'd rather just get plastered. He saw Ukitake walking towards Yamamoto's office and jumped down next to him.

Mayuri didn't even hear. He was too busy flowing through the garganta to the Eightieth District of West Rukongai.

"This should be far enough. I am, after all, invulnerable."

Kisuke grinned. "Glad to hear it. Take care of yourself. By the way, when you need your sword, it'll still be at Karakura High. I put a barrier on it, in case anyone sees it, they won't be able to pick it up." He walked back through the tunnel to his shop, along the path he had created for Mayuri.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Nemu!"

"I am here, father."

"Good. How was the battle?"

"The bad news is: Kuchiki-taicho was killed."

"That is bad."

"The good news is, I was ale to test the brain-restoration serum on him."

"Perfect!" Nemu couldn't remember the last time she'd ever made her father so happy. "How did it work?"

"He came back to us, and was awake within a few hours of the injection. Unfortunately, he forced Akon to release him."

"Forced Akon to release him?"

"Kuchiki-taicho is one of the most powerful fighters in Seireitei. There was little Akon could do."

"Well, true. I will have to rest for three days, maybe more. If I recover. The adult Quincy managed to hit a vital spirit point."

Nemu was somehow able to mask her concern. Probably not as impressive as it sounds, considering who we're talking about...

**Hey, someone has to catch a break, right?**

**I'm still not sure what I'll do to Mayuri. Maybe I'll kill him, but I probably hit the good guys a little too bad already...**

**Anyway, please review.**


	53. Two kinds of BANG!

Mayuri settled in his bedroom, and began waiting. He looked at the clock (more or less,) and saw 8:59.

He didn't remember the last time he'd entered this form, except vaguely.

He was sure, however, that something was wrong when he began to feel hungry...

_Ah. That's right, I lost my chain-link. This should be a fascinating effect. If I am still sane enough to realize it during the transformation..._

_I wonder why I am simply not being weakened. Transformation shouldn't be as simple as losing the chain-link. Maybe it's my serum state trying to fix my vital point._

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"This meeting is called to order!"

Yamamoto slammed the tip of his staff into the ground in an authoritative, if-the-floor-was-your-skull-you'd-get-a-migrane sort of way.

"Kuchiki-taicho, will you please describe the events that led your men to attempt to _investigate the Central 46_?"

"Yes. I met with an informant who I believed to have information on Zaraki-taicho, who as we have probably all been informed, has killed Tosen-taicho, and tried to kill Soifon-taicho."

"Did this informant tell you where the find this criminal?"

"No, but he told me that he suspected that Central 46 had been compromised."

"To what extent did the informant believe that the offices had been compromised?"

"He believed that they had been killed to a man and replaced by imposters."

"I see. And your men investigated based on this informant's information. Could you please tell us his name?"

"I would rather not reveal his name. He works for me on condition of anonymity."

"I see. This informant seems to be well informed. I wish you to stay in contact with him, and, should he turn out to have had any hand in these events, arrest him."

"Hai, Yamamoto-soutaicho." _Now how the hell am I supposed to accomplish __that__?_

"Yamamoto-sama? What did the investigation turn up?" Komamura's tone sounded worried, for once. They couldn't see his facial expression because of the helmet, but with a muster call at nine at night, who wasn't nervous?

Yamamoto's air of sorrow and anxiousness only became obvious to everyone at this point.

"They found the corpses of my superiors. All of them. All of them appeared to have been dead since we found Kuchiki Rukia's reiatsu signature. Thus, we can consider all of the orders since then to be null and void, and myself the sole ruling voice, with the exception of His Majesty and the Royal Guard."

"What are your orders, Yamamoto-soutaicho?" _Please pardon my sister, please pardon my sister._

"Your sister is wanted for questioning in their deaths."_ DAMN IT!_

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

_**A couple of days later.**_

"Is there any reason why you wished to be down here, in this untraceable room, with me as the only witness?"

"Yes. I think I am about to turn into a hollow. If neccesary, I want you to run, tell everyone what happened, and take my place. But try to only do that once it becomes clear that I am beyond hope, okay?"

"Hai." _What did he do this time?_

"It's starting to happen!..."

A hole appeared in the puddle of goo, and a hollow began to grow around it.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Hey, Your Majesty!"

Mayuri laughed. "You do me too much honor."

"Damn right! You don't have the instinct to kill, to fight, to become stronger, that you need to defeat me!"

"Oh, so that's what I need?"

"Yes! Yes, you damn, machine loving, hollow-dissecting piece of shit!"

Mayuri took on an insane grin.

"In that case, the word 'fucked' does not describe the amount of trouble you are in."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

The hollow's torso had only begun to form when it's eyes shot out of focus, and it collapsed.

"Mayuri-sama?" She ran towards it.

And regretted it a few seconds later.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Mayuri got up, still wearing his hollow mask.

As the dust cleared, he made out the figure of his fukutaicho.

"Remember. The story is, we tried to dissect a hollow, but we had to put it down, and it exploded."

"Hai, Mayuri-sama. But will anyone believe that?"

"Ha ha ha! I know, even you'd be suspicious! But I gave you a good enough mind, despite what I tell you twice a day. Those morons won't suspect a thing!"

"But what about your mask?"

"Oh, don't worry about that..."

He pulled it off. "See?"

She watched as it vanished.

"I see."

"Can you walk?"

She tried her best, but her legs were broken.

"I see."

He began walking towards her.

Sometimes, she thought getting severely injured was worth it, just so her father could heal her, in his own special way...

**Please review.**


	54. Big Brother Is Watching You

"Do you believe that my sister is involved with these events?"

"Your men told me that they traced the time of death to the day her reiatsu was traced. I wish to analyze the possible connection. I also wish to speak to her about her previous actions. Now that the death sentence on her head has proven invalid, I must decide how, or _if_, she is to be punished. If she can convince me that her actions were justified, I will spare her life."

"I am glad to hear that."

"I know this has been hard on you, Kuchiki-taicho. You are skilled at hiding your thoughts, but I could sense it. If your sister had a reason for what she did, she will not be punished."

"There is also another matter of which we must speak. Karakura Town has become a dangerous place for us. We can no longer deploy any soldiers who have not proven themselves to be among our best to that area. As the sole ruling voice for the Gotei 13, I hereby place all the territory within three reiri under marital law. No officer under Third Seat rank will be permitted entry into the area in question, and those entering this territory will not, no matter their rank, be required to restrict their abilities as is the usual practice. The town itself is off limits to all who have not reached taicho rank."

"Kuchiki-taicho! Ukitake-taicho! I wish your help in convincing Kuchiki-san to turn herself in. The rest of you are dismissed."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

_**Two days later, one reiri from the taicho-only area...**_

"Are you certain this will work, Kuchiki-taicho?"

"Not at all. But I know for a fact that it is a better idea than walking into Karakura Town shouting my sister's name. Have you ever been killed, Ukitake-taicho?"

"To be honest, no. But this disease is doing its best."

"Maybe Kurotsuchi-fukutaicho could help you with that."

"No. I don't trust a single one of the monstrous inventions that man has made. I don't know or care what nest of foul creatures Urahara-san found him in, but I wish we could send him back!"

"If it were not for him and his daughter, I would be dead right now."

"I know, but, the dead coming back to life! It's... unnatural."

"I know. Ordinarily, I would probably rather stay dead. But, the side effects..."

Ukitake paled. "Side effects?"

"I'll show you when we get back."

They both stopped just outside of the even more restricted area. They knew from intelligence that the vizard shopped in an area just at the town border at around this time of day, and that they were sure to sense the two taicho eventually.

"So, a note from me, and another from Abarai-fukutaicho."

Ukitake placed them both into a box, which had the sixth and thirteenth division's emblems on it. He also placed a "Chappy The Rabbit" gikongan dispenser into it.

"And now..."

They both pushed out as much power as they could. It would serve as a signal to anything with any spirit sense at all that they were there, and the vizard were sure to notice. Since they recognized Ukitake's reiatsu, they were sure to investigate.

Using only the most powerful men they could spare, of course.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Ah, Urahara-san. Hirako-san. Yourichi-san. Tsukabishi-san You came. And... I don't believe we've met?"

"The orange haired one is Kurosaki Ichigo. I was unable to observe his abilities to a very great extent, but he's fast enough to dodge Senbonzakura's petals. He seems to be a bakudo specialist: he was able to use it to immobilize Izuru-fukutaicho and Matsumoto-fukutaicho."

"Ha, actually bakudo's my weak point. Wanna see what I can do with zanjutsu and hado?"

The white haired man grinned. "Thank you, no. We actually haven't come here to fight."

"Smart man." Ichigo took his hand off his oversize sword.

"So, what are you here for, Ukitake-san?"

"Ukitake-san? So that means this guy is?"

"Yeah. This is one of the guys I've been training you to stand a chance against. And at your current level, you probably don't."

"Actually, we're here to deliver this." He handed it to Urahara.

"To, Kuchiki-san. When she opens this, will it spray poison all over the room, or merely inject her with it?"

"Actually, this is a gift from myself and Abarai-san. Which means the only surprises are going to be pleasant ones."

"I see. And the reason Kuchiki-taicho is here?"

"I was assigned to come here and deliver it. Which brings me to something else... we know what happened to Central 46, and when. Due to that, every decree the false 46 has given is now invalid, leaving the soutaicho to decide what to do with Rukia. If she can convince him that her actions were justified, she will not be punished for them."

"At any rate, could you please _not_ tell her I came? I doubt she will trust me as readily as she would Ukitake-taicho alone."

Shinji snorted. "How about you go fuck yourself? We're telling her who sent this, and we're making sure to have healers on hand when and if she opens it. Frankly, I'd rather toss it into the garganta still sealed, and let whatever kind of bomb you put in here blow up on a passing hollow."

"Do you distrust shinigami that much?"

"Yes."

"Do you honestly believe I would allow my sister to be assassinated?"

"Actually, given your noble blood... fuck yeah!"

"What about Yamamoto-soutaicho? Would he conceive such an idea? Don't say that Central 46 would have, we told you, we found them all dead."

Shinji hesitated. Whatever he thought of shinigami in general. He knew Yamamoto-soutaicho. Whatever kind of crap the other shinigami were capable of, he knew that Yamamoto, and his two students, were shining lights in the dark, dismal world that was Soul Society. And yes, he knew Central 46 was dead, though he was surprised Seireitei found out...

"Maybe this was your idea?"

"Maybe. Why do you not trust us?"

"You're asking me, you pretty boy nobleman bastard!? I got a death sentence with no chance of confronting my accusers or even testifying in my own defense! Fuck you!"

"You were found with a hollow mask attached to your face. It was fairly obvious what happened." Byakuya stared into Shinji's incredibly pissed off eyes.

"Yeah, I got experimented on. Did any of you assholes stop to think that _maybe_ it wasn't my damn idea?"

"The matter at hand wasn't whether you had consented. The matter at hand was whether you were threats to Seireitei. Judging by the fact that Karakura Town is not yet in ruins, I would say that they jumped to conclusions as to whether or not that was the case."

"Really, Sherlock? God-damn!"

"This is irrelevant. Will you deliver this package, or not?"

"Yeah, we'll cover it in a barrier, show it to her, and strongly suggest she let us throw it in the garganta unopened. Tsukabishi-san, could you please?"

He moved his hands through a sequence of seals, and the box glowed blue.

"Is that really necessary?" Ukitake finally spoke up?

Yourichi looked him in the eyes. "I'd like to think it isn't. I know if you thought this box was dangerous, you'd never let your subordinate see it. But there could be something you weren't told."

"I saw and handled the contents of the box myself. I even bought the gikongan dispenser. There is nothing dangerous in there."

Shinji grinned. "Too late. The barrier's already up. We'll tell Rukia you said that, though. You're actually one of the few shinigami whose word I'm willing to take on this sort of thing. Maybe I won't push so hard to get it tossed into space."

"That's as much as we can ask. Goodbye."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"What did they want?"

Rukia stood at the dining room entrance, looking at her friends curiously. She had decided to stay at the vizard warehouse: more room, and she could watch the new guy train. It was actually kind of funny to watch his mask break after about three hours. The part where he went flying was definitely worth the boredom that kicked in after about, oh... five minutes.

"They wanted us to give you this."

Rukia took it.

"Why is there a barrier on it?"

"Because we thought there might be a bomb in there."

Rukia dropped the package and took ten steps back.

She also hid behind Kensei for good measure.

"Don't worry. Ukitake-taicho assured us there was nothing nasty in there, but that was _after_ Tsukabishi-san put the barrier on it."

"I see."

She picked it up, and looked at it.

"Could you take it off now, please?"

Tessai put a hand on the box. The barrier faded.

"Okay." She pulled it open, and her jaw dropped.

"Yes! This is so sweet! Ukitake-taicho got me this?"

"Yeah, him, Abarai-san and your brother."

She made a hiding spot out of Kensei again, and then realized that Rose was farther away, and jumped there.

"Don't worry. Ukitake-taicho assured us it wasn't going to explode."

"How can he be sure?"

"He handled everything in there himself. He even bought the gikongan dispenser."

"Okay..."

"A note from Ukitake-taicho telling me Central 46 is dead, has been dead since I was traced... and now my case is being reopened. Yamamoto-soutaicho says he could tell I broke the law, but if he agrees I had a good reason, he'll drop charges."

"Uh, yeah. You were hanging around vizard, exiles, and, oh yeah ME, the representative who you gave your powers to. And here he says he might pardon us. Wow, that's believable."

"Yamamoto-soutaicho is a reasonable man. If we can convince him that we had a good reason..."

"Oh, yeah. Listen, I know we might get off on the part where you gave me your powers. Everyone's going to agree we had a good reason there. But the rest of it sounds so absurd, even _I_ don't believe it most of the time. The part where Aizen uses his zanpakuto, which nobody knows can hypnotize people, to impersonate the Central 46, and then fakes his own death? I think that's a lot to swallow."

"Yeah, but they're already reeling. They'll prob'bly believe us, seeing as they already saw somethin' they never wanted to believe."

Everyone turned to see the massive form of Zaraki Kenpachi standing in the doorway. He was no longer wearing his shinigami uniform, having abandoned it for blue jeans and a wifebeater.

He still wore his frayed haori, being too proud to ditch his prize of battle.

"How much you hear, man?" Ichigo looked at the new arrival a little nervously, even if they were all in the same boat.

"Pretty much all of it. Yeah, they'll probably let you off. You can say we looked like your only option, and tell them your reasons for deserting, and for giving him your powers. Central wouldn't 'ave cared, but the old geezer will. He really tries to be fair, not like those power-crazed, bribe-loving bastards Aizen wasted. Maybe he did us a favor, killing a corrupt bunch of officials, and setting you guys up with your masks, so you can form the last line of defense."

"Maybe, but what about convincing Yamamoto-soutaicho of the threat Aizen poses? And helping you all regain your honor?"

"Don't try. Just tell your brother that Gin's a threat, and he'll do what he can. Maybe you can get transferred into Eleventh, they'd like a couple of hard-line fighters like you."

"But, you'll still be stuck on the wrong side of the law!" Rukia was looking shocked. Her new friends were volunteering to be abandoned!

Zaraki grinned, and there was a trace of sadness in it, for once in his life. "I can't speak for these guys, but I really don' care about what the law thinks. I'm not here because of a spur-of-the-momen' decision to save an innocen' person, or because I was at the wrong place at the wrong time, and made a convenient scapegoat. I _chose_ this. I knew Yachiru was in trouble, but I chose to defy the law and help her. Not because she was innocent, I didn't really care when I helped her. Even if she '_ad_ used forbidd'n techniques, I still would have helped 'er. I don' regret it, and I won' abandon 'er."

Yourichi grinned. "Wow. That sounds like a perfect description of how I feel. Even if I could abandon Urahara, I wouldn't. I'm staying right here, come hell or high water."

"But, what about me!?" Rukia was looking even more shocked.

Urahara stepped forward. "I never should have placed the Hougyouku in your soul without permission. I put you in danger unnecessarily. All I can do now is take it out of you, and encourage you to try and salvage your life in Seireitei. We're beyond hope. You're not."

"But I want to help!"

Urahara hesitated. "There... might be something else you can do."

"What's that?"

Urahara looked at her quite seriously. "I want you two to try to achieve bankai, and stay near Ichimaru Gin. The minute he commits overt treason, you'll be justified in executing him for the good of Seireitei. You already are, but we need Yamamoto-soutaicho to agree with us there."

Rukia was stunned. This man was seriously suggesting that they try to reach the pinnacle of power for the shinigami, and use it to execute an infiltrator at the highest level of the Gotei Thirteen!

Ichigo just took it in stride.

"Got it."

_**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX IN SEIREITEI XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX**_

Ukitake, Kuckiki, and Yamamoto sat in the soundproofed room together.

Sasakibe was standing at his superior's side. The other two had no soldiers in the room.

"Are you certain that they have no chance of detecting your new binding spell, Byakuya-taicho?" Yamamoto's harsh tones sounded throughout the room.

"Yes. Not only do they not know I can cast it, owing to the fact that I invented it a day ago, for this very mission, but it is expertly concealed, and it is designed so that it would alert me instantly if it had been traced."

"Then there is almost no chance that this... grave news... could be vizard propaganda?" Ukitake's face was paler than normal. It looked like he was close to another coughing fit.

"Even a master of conventional kido could not have beaten this spell without having seen it before, and nobody has."

"I see. Very well. I still wish to personally judge this case, obviously. If their actions were justified, I will pardon them. We will also have to investigate the past cases that this evidence calls into question, of course."

"And, Ichimaru-taicho?"

"If the two can be trusted, then we will train them both to the level necessary to _keep him in check._"

Ukitake's lungs suddenly felt like gasoline meeting a zippo.

**Please review.**


	55. The Trial Gets Underway

Ichigo looked down at his gikongan dispenser, wondering why the hell he had decided to save the damn modsoul inside it from destruction.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox Flashback xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"_**Ya, ha ha ha ha!"**_ The modsoul jumped up from building with a look of glee on his borrowed face.

And stopped in his tracks when he saw a late teenage looking man with dual wakizashi blocking his path.

"You're not that fast, are you?"

The modsoul's answer was to aim a kick at his face.

Whereupon Inoue Sora grabbed him by the leg and lifted him into the air.

And shunpo-ed away with him.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"There you are, you bastard!"

"Hey, Master Ichigo! I did a great job guarding Matsumoto-chan, didn't I?"

"No, you ran off. And that wasn't the worst of it, either."

"Oh, come on!"

"What the hell is your problem!?"

"My problem! I scheduled to get blown up by Seireitei! I'm alive because of luck!"

"And that entitles you to use my body to go on a rampage!? Your lucky it didn't get hurt, or I would find a way to kick your ass!"

"Okay, I admit that wasn't cool, but come on! They'll find me eventually, and then, when they do... So why shouldn't I have fun?"

"If you're worried about getting killed... I guess we can hide you. But no more of that bullshit!"

"Rea... really?"

"Sure, why not?"

"Thank you! You won't regret this!

_Yes, I will._

_**Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox End Flashback xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Rukia and Ichigo met at the outskirts of Karakura Town, at noon. Rukia was in a gigai, and Ichigo was in his natural body.

They both carried gikongan dispensers, afraid of getting ambushed.

Yamamoto finally arrived, not in a gigai. Sasakibe was standing next to him.

Kuchiki-taicho arrived next, with Renji standing to his right.

Next to arrive was Ukitake-taicho. By some miracle, his two subordinates were standing next to each other without fighting.

Soifon-taicho was the last to arrive. She had a thoroughly cowed looking Omeada standing to her left. It was fairly obvious he saw the danger in being so damn close to the "taicho only" zone.

"Everyone has arrived. And now... where were you two on the evening of September Seventh?"

They hesitated. Ichigo spoke up first.

"I was in my room, trying to get some obnoxious-ass ghost to get lost."

"I see. And I would imagine that was where you and Rukia met?"

"Yeah, she came into my room and sent the ghost on. I didn't believe she was actually a shinigami, so she put a Restrain spell on my arms."

"I see. Continue."

"Well, the house was attacked by a hollow, and it grabbed my sisters. I tried to save them, and Rukia got injured stopping it from killing me. She tried to win by giving me some of her power, but I subconsciously drained most of it. I jumped at the hollow, and killed it without putting in too much effort."

"All of this despite being unable to move your arms?"

"I broke the spell before I attacked the hollow."

"I see. We might have some use for power like that, if your story checks out, and you agree to help us." Ukitake was very much against killing these two, and was kind of hoping to get them both of them put under his command.

The orange-head would make one hell of a fukutaicho.

As would Rukia, but small chance of that.

First step, though, was convincing the others that the benefits outweighed the risks without tipping his hand to Aizen and Gin.

"Thanks. Well, then Rukia stumbled away trying to find some way to do her job without the power she'd given me. I think that's when she met Urahara."

"I see. And of course, if what you say is true, there was little choice about excepting his aid." Yamamoto knew that this was probably going to be where the truth-telling stopped, and the half-truths started, but he just decided to try anyway. "Please continue."

"Well, that's when I started using this" she held up her glove "to force him out of his body occasionally. The idea was to have him do my job, even if I couldn't. I know I was using him, but that really can't be avoided in some cases."

"I see. Unfortunate, but I agree that it was necessary. And of course, that would mean he had no choice either. Did you at any point misuse my sister's powers, Kurosaki-san?"

"You mean, use them for personal gain, or something? No, it never occurred to me."

"I see."

They all turned to Soifon-taicho, expecting her to look angry these criminals were getting a say. But, she didn't seem to object. She seemed to agree that Rukia's conduct was somewhat justified. Either that, or she thought Ichigo might make a better fukutaicho than Omeada...

"So, you two tried to do right... I see. Do we have any evidence against what they've said so far?" She turned to her fellow judges. They shook their heads.

Yamamoto looked at them gravely. "I believe every word you have said. But why did you fight against my men when they came to arrest you?"

Ichigo looked at Yamamoto, seriously wondering why he had bothered to ask. "If you'd taken Rukia, would she have gotten a fair trial? Surrender wasn't really a good option, until you found Central 46 dead."

"That is a remarkable turn of events. The chamber was found to have died the day you were traced. A strange coincidence..."

"Do you think we had anything to do with it? The fakes would have tried to impede the investigation if they were in our pockets, don't you think?"

"Yes, they would have. However, I also wish to ask why Rukia-san and Kurosaki Ichigo-san were both seen using shinigami powers in their own defense."

"I unlocked my own powers a while back, during a fight with a hybrid shinigami-hollow. He later stabilized his powers and became a vizard. He's the one with the dual flame/poison zanpakuto."

"I see."

"Now, I wish to reach a verdict on whether or not these two should be punished for the crime of trafficking shinigami abilities, and Rukia's crime of overstaying her time in the material world. These are the only two issues this vote will cover, any other crimes are to be handled by myself, Kuchiki-taicho, Soifon-taicho and Ukitake-taicho, after this vote. If they are found innocent, the rest of you will leave us to discuss this matter. Either way, neither of you will be required to fight against those who took you in: in fact, I think that given their noble actions protecting you, they will be left alone for the time being."

"But, soutaicho!" Soifon was looking shocked. Rukia deserved acquittal, but the vizard?!

"Each of the shinigami present will be given a vote, either acquittal, or punishment. My own is acquittal."

"ACQUITTAL!" Rukia's third-seat friends each tried to be first and loudest to speak.

Ukitake grinned. "Acquittal."

Sasakibe raised his hand. "Acquittal."

Renji raised his. "Acquittal."

Byakuya looked his sister in the eye as he spoke. "Acquittal."

Omeada gave the dumbest looking grin ever to adorn his face. "Acquittal."

Soifon wasn't entirely sure about the precedent this would set, but it was only fair. _Why do I have to help with this trial? Oh yeah, in case the vizard attack us._ "Acquittal."

"Very well. If you would all leave for Seireitei, now, so that the accused can face the remaining charges."

They all left, except the ones who were ordered to stay, and Rukia's friends.

"Ukitake-taicho! Can't we stay?"

Ukitake grinnned. "Relax. Rukia's not in any trouble, we just want to learn some things from her before we go back. We'll raise a barrier, so we're not disturbed. Now go on. Rukia and I will see you at home."

"Hai, taicho!"

They foot-raced to an open senkaimon.

Byakuya looked at Renji.

"Don't worry. She's my sister."

Renji cast him a mistrustful glance.

"Don't worry, Abarai-san. I can take that rich bastard if he tries anything."

Renji cast a worried glance at Ichigo, but still left.

"Okay. First..."

Yamamoto's hands moved like lightning as he cast a barrier. It wasn't powerful, but it was enough to completely soundproof the area.

"There was a listening spell of Ukitake-taicho's letter, Rukia-san. We heard everything. We know you know about a conspiracy, and we want names."

"Names, soutaicho?"

"Yes. I intend to have Soifon-taicho keep an eye on every person you name. Don't worry about assassinating Ichimaru-taicho. If it is justified, we will allow you to do it."

"Wh-what? I checked the letter twenty times last night! There can't have been a spell on it!"

"I knew the spells you were going to use to check. I made certain that they would never reveal the spell's presence."

Ukitake-taicho looked a little ashamed of himself. "I'm sorry, Rukia-san, but we had to. And aren't you glad we did? There's no way we would have believed you if you'd just told us this. But now we know, and we can help you. Now, please, tell us everything you know."

She gulped. "Okay... you'll know about Aizen-taicho and Ichimaru-taicho by now, and Tosen-taicho's dead."

Ukitake's jaw dropped. "Tosen-taicho!"

"Yeah. Then there's the gatekeepers..."

Soifon-taicho's jaw dropped. "Impossible! The four gatekeepers of Seireitei, criminals?"

"Three of them at least. We aren't sure about Jidanbo-san."

"I see. Is this all you have?"

"No. There are some hollows helping him. He rules the Menos Forest in Hueco Mundo, and has a fortress on the surface called 'Las Noches.'"

"I see. Is this everything?"

"Everything we know, sir."

"Very good. We heard about an object called the Hougyouku, which was stored inside your soul. Can you elaborate?"

"Uh..."

"I will do my best to judge fairly, Rukia-san."

"Okay... it's this... object, Urahara-san made, that he really regrets..." She hesitated, trying to figure out how to say this without getting Yamamoto in a Soukyou-happy sort of mood.

"With his inventive track record, I'm not surprised. What does it do?"

"It was designed to... do you remember the hollowfication experiments he was accused of doing?"

"Yes. He really did make something capable of doing it?"

"Hai. He got the theory worked out, and made an object that can do it. Not just making shinigami more powerful by blurring the lines: he says that it can do the opposite too."

"What?!" Yamamoto's jaw dropped as his eyes flew wide open.

"Yes. It can make hollows stronger too. That's why Aizen wanted it, and why Urahara-san tried to hide it. That's really the whole point of the conspiracy: to overthrow Seireitei using the orb!"

"I see. And Urahara used this... orb... to create the vizard?"

"No! He tried to use his expertise to heal them when he found them after the experiments! Aizen was the one who turned them! He's wanted to increase his own power for a century!

"I see. Why did Urahara not try to destroy this object?"

"Well... He tried everything. Up to and including turning his bankai on it. Acid, high level hado spells, nothing worked."

"I see. That is all. You are pardoned of every crime you have committed. We cannot officially pardon your friends without more evidence, and we will not until this current crisis is resolved, for fear of alerting the conspirators that they have been found out. We will also make only token efforts to find them, in order to reward them for their... rather undeserved loyalty."

"Now, Rukia will return with us, and Kurosaki Ichigo will return to his home. Don't bother looking for a way to contact us: we will send Rukia back in two days time to speak with you. You may inform Urahara-san of this development. I know that you have a contact who can inform him. You are not, of course, to risk meeting Urahara himself."

"Got it."

**It's going to be really hard to keep screwing everybody over at this point, but by God, I'll keep trying!**

**Please review.**


	56. The News Delivered

"So, how'd the trial go, Ichigo?"

"Great, dad. I can't be seen with our pals anymore, but Rukia and I've been acquitted. The soutaicho also said he'll leave our friends alone, until _he's_ gone, and then he'll pardon them."

Kurosaki Isshin's jaw dropped.

"What?! How the hell did you pull that off?!"

"There was a listening spell on the present they gave Rukia. They know the truth. They'd pardon the others right off, except they don't want to tip their hand. So far, the only shinigami who know about _his_ plan are Ukitake-taicho, Yamamoto-soutaicho, Soifon-taicho, and Kuchiki-taicho. And us, of course."

"_Crap_. How did we _not_ catch that!? If we really were crooks, you and Rukia'd would probably be in custody!"

"What are you two talking about?" Kurosaki Karin poked her head down the stairs as her father winced. He then caught himself, and turned to face her with the trademark "dumbass-dad" grin plastered on his face.

"We fooled you! Come on, give your old man a hug!"

She promptly threw a kick at his face and stormed upstairs.

Ichigo looked down at his father, who was now lying on the ground pretending to be injured.

"Wow, dad. I still can't believe you're such a good actor."

"Neither can I."

The two burst out laughing.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"You called, taicho?"

"Yes, Abarai-san. I was wondering if you would help oversee the training of Kurosaki Ichigo while he is here."

"So, he's really going to join us?"

"Yes."

"I see. Kuchiki-taicho, I know I shouldn't ask questions, and I'll do what you told me, but..."

"Yes, Abarai-fukutaicho?"

"Am... am I out of a job?"

"I haven't ruled it out. You should hope that Kurosaki-san does."

_Damn, I hope Rukia talks him into taking someone else's job..._

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Sora screamed as his hand was torn a sunroof.

_I could probably help you think of a way to do this right, but this is just too funny! I can't think under these conditions! Sorry, Your Majesty!_

_Go deepthroat a horse!_

**Writer's block again.**

**Sorry, guys. Between the Warcraft III map I'm making, and my college essays, I don't have much creativity left.**


	57. Plans For A Trip

**A day later**

"Ow, fuck!"

"Maybe you should try another approach?" Hachigen began the spell.

"Like what? My hollow said he might be able to help... once he stops laughing, the piece of..."

"The hollow would probably try to gain influence over you in exchange, with or without your permission or knowledge, if indeed he was seriously making the offer instead of attempting to antagonize you. What I was about to suggest was that you attempt to create a less complicated attack or spell," Hachigen removed the barrier that was healing his friends hand, and Sora pulled back a whole one "as practice for whatever this one is. It might improve your control."

"Well, this is all that I can find in my head right about now..."

"Well... how about a larger scale version of something you can already do with your mask?"

"Hm... I think that'll work." Sora thought about the limits of one of his attacks in particular...

_I think I can make this one work..._

Kensei walked towards them, and spoke up, interrupting Sora's thoughts.

"I hope you can still use that hand, because it's time for you to practice something that might actually help you."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Don Kanonjii grinned as the thought of the coming week's exorcism surged through him.

He would be helping another soul get to heaven, and, almost as good, would be getting even more publicity.

He didn't really need the money or the fame. The show had only really been a way to make money helping people nobody else could, people whose relatives probably thought were beyond all worry.

Helping the ghosts leave for heaven was all that really mattered, and if he had to choose between keeping his wealth and helping ghosts, he'd take the latter. Not that it mattered, he was wealthy because he helped ghosts, right?

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Ichigo sat down in the abandoned classroom. He knew he wasn't going to be interrupted here, but just to be safe, he had Rukia put up a barrier to dissuade mortals from entering. He had decided to tell his friends he was going on a trip, hence the reason he had come to school. (Orihime seemed really distressed, Tatsuki didn't seem moved at all, Chad was his usual, unshaken self. For some reason, Chizuru was rejoicing.)

"June 17th. I have to stay until then. It's the anniversary of my mother's death. After that, I can stay in Seireitei up to a whole year, until, of course, the next anni... ver... do you think I can find her in Soul Society, if I look hard enough?"

"It's entirely possible, but..."

"But what?"

"First off, there's no guarantee she made it there. She could have easily been eaten by a hollow before anyone arrived. She may even have become one."

"She wouldn't have become one... and if any hollow dared to eat her..." Ichigo's reiatsu began to spike. He relaxed the next second, trying to stay under control.

"Well, there's one thing about leaving the day after that..."

"What's that?" Rukia was trying to guess what he was trying to blow off through this convenient excuse.

Ichigo grinned.

"There's this dumbass show about a dude who says he's exorcising all kinds of spirits in all kinds of places. And it's coming to Karakura Town June 20th. I say we leave before the moron arrives."

"Shouldn't we take a look? What if he really is going after real spirits? If one of them is a hollow..."

"Then it's hat-and-clogs' problem. He can handle it easier than we can."

Rukia shrugged. "Maybe we shouldn't leave it to him?"

Ichigo raised an eyebrow. "Why not?"

"I mean... think of everything he's done to help us!"

Ichigo recovered his voice in about half a second, somehow. "Like what? Giving us Stockholm Syndrome? If anything, he still owes you for that crap with the Hougyouku!"

"Well, I wouldn't mind seeing the show. Maybe he really is dealing with spirits!"

"No."

"_Pweeeaaaase!?"_

Ichigo started vaguely wondering while the hell she expected that to work on him. That trick could control just about anyone else, but Ichigo...

"No."

"Fine. I'll just tell your father about how you angrily shot me down about wanting to see some mortal entertainment. _He'll be soooo proud..."_

"He won't care."

"So, both of you are meanies? Your sisters will _love_ to hear..."

"They can't do anything about it."

Sniff sniff.

_Damn, she could make a living pulling this crap._

"I'll... I'll tell nii-sama!"

"He won't care, and I can take him anyway. I know his weakness, that sword of his has a lot of attack, no defense."

Rukia burst into giggles.

"Remember what Urahara told you about shikai and bankai?"

"Yeah?"

"Well if you remember, shikai is the most basic release form of a zanpakuto, and bankai is a larger form that often gains extra abilities to compensate for the weaknesses it had as a shikai. If, indeed, it had any weaknesses. Nii-sama's bankai has so many individual blades, he can actually use them to defend as well as attack. And, he doesn't need to fight you, he's rich and powerful enough to destroy you while keeping you perfectly healthy otherwise."

"So, the only thing I have on him is he doesn't care?"

"Damn it. But what if I tell..."

_Ukitake-taicho won't care, and he isn't scary. Crap, I ran out._

"I don't want to see it."

Rukia pouted.

**Took me a while, huh?**

**But I think I've still got one on Uncle Joe...**

**Please read and review.**


	58. Grand Fisher

**Once upon a time, there was a somewhat talented fanfic writer with a few fans, one of whom actually took the time to review. And for a time, it was good. But then the writer went to community college, and was barely able to scrape together the creativity needed to write this chapter.**

**I feel like Uncle Joe.**

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Ichigo stood at the gravestone. His father was behind him, with a cigarette in his lips.

Rukia was standing behind him, looking slightly uncomfortable, while Yuzu and Karin just stood by.

There was one man with them. A shinigami from the third division, in gigai, introduced as a friend of Ichigo's.

They all stood at the grave, the family, the friend, and the bodyguard.

_Because I'm really likely to get killed if I don't have one of those..._

Ichigo suddenly glanced out towards a river near the graveyard. He felt Rukia and Isshin's eyes on him. He turned to see the bodyguard fingering a gikongan dispenser.

They had noticed it too.

He turned to the bodyguard. "Could you watch my sisters for a second? I want to talk with Dad and Rukia alone for a second."

The bodyguard grinned. "Sure."

Ichigo turned to go, then looked back for a second.

_If he falls asleep again, I am going to kill him._

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"You two sensed him too, huh?"

"Yeah."

The three of them popped out of their bodies.

"Okay, let's go."

They vanished, and, looking around, saw a ghost about throw herself into the water.

_That's the one who..._

As tempting as it was to let her drown again, he jumped to stop her.

As he grabbed her to perform the soul burial, he heard a pair of claws whistle in to strike. He jumped with the ghost, and the hollow missed both of them.

He then saw the hollow appear with a cord reaching out of its head, leading to...

To...

A look of understanding appeared on his face, followed by horror, and then rage. The transition from the first to the third took less than a second, if you had a spirit-sensitive video camera you wouldn't be able to see the frames where it transitioned.

Or the frame in which Zangetsu left his back and splattered the fake ghost all over the sky.

He threw it aside as Fisher cursed in pain.

"So, it all makes a lot more sense now..."

He threw out a hand, with his middle and pointer fingers pointing at the hollow's knees.

"Hado: Number Four... White Lightning!"

Fisher screamed as he fell to the ground, and as Ichigo charged in to attack, he put Zangetsu back and raised a fist.

SLAM

The mask cracked under the force.

"You piece of shit!"

"Calm _down_, Ichigo."

He turned to see his father standing there, with a blade out, and pointing at the hollow's eye.

He grabbed his father by the collar. "_Are you kidding? Do you know what this hollow __**did**__!?"_

"I have for longer than you. I noticed the fatal wound on your mother's back, a wound that could only have come from a hollow. I had Urahara trace the reiatsu to be sure, but he, I and Ryuken all thought it was him from the attack style anyway."

"Ah, you guys are talking about a victim? Don't bother telling me a name, I don't keep track."

"She was my _**mother,**__** you son of a bitch!"**_

"_**Wait!**_ Even if we grow to hate a hollow, the way we hate Fisher, we must remember that that is only one part of who he is! The human inside _**never**_ wanted this, and the _least_ we can do is make it quick!"

Ichigo grinned in embarrassment. "Right. Want to do it together?"

Isshin grinned. "Of course."

Fisher saw their fingers began to glow, and even if fleeing wasn't an option, decided he had to fight.

His claws reached out...

"Hado: Number Four... White Lightning!"

The blasts shot through his skull before he could defend himself.

**I'm baaaaaaaaaack!**

**Please read and review.**


	59. Don Kanonji

**I'm still back.**

"Okay, time to go to Seireitei."

Ichigo and Rukia both stepped through the spirit gate. Rukia was in her gigai, Ichigo's body was being spirit exchanged.

Ichigo had a pack of proper gikongan, and decided to leave Kon in a plushie. Bringing the guy to Seireitei seemed like pushing his luck.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

_**A two days later...**_

Inoue Sora sat on the roof of the abandoned hospital, looking down at the trapped ghost and the moron in the dumbass outfit. He couldn't attend in gigai, seeing as his sister was there and there would be awkward questions, but somehow he imagined he saw her keep glancing in his direction, instead of looking at the stage. Could she really see him?

_Business at hand, business at hand, business at... what is he **doing?!**_

Sora's blades were out in a flash. He dropped to the stage and cut the moron's cane into thirds.

"_AAHHHH! Another ghost has interfered! He broke my cane!"_

Ignoring the fool in the stupid hat, Sora brought down the hilt of one of his swords for a soul burial...

And the moron's hand shot out to stop him. Sora felt an incredible pressure on his wrist, and couldn't move that hand.

_He shouldn't be that strong. Oh well._

"Bakudo: Number One... Restrain!"

The moron's hands shot behind him, and then back as he broke through the spell with brute spirit force.

_He **really** shouldn't be that damn strong. Oh well..._

"If you want to interfere, I'll have to send **you** to heaven too!"

Sora's foot lashed out, sending the mortal a couple of yards backwards. Wasting no time, Sora brought down the wakizashi's hilt, sending the trapped ghost to peace.

Don Kanonji watched as the ghost vanished.

Kanonji's voice came in a whisper, so the audience couldn't hear, even with the mics.

"If that's what it looks like when a soul goes to heaven, what have _I_ been doing?"

"You don't want to know. All you want to know is you haven't done any damage that the proper authorities can't repair given enough time, and that you have to _stop it_. _**Now!**_" Not thinking that anyone could hear him, Sora didn't bother whispering.

"O... okay. You're... the proper authorities?"

"No, but I have the same powers they do."

"How?"

"The proper authorities are ghosts themselves. They were born with these powers hidden inside them as mortals, and they manifest after they die. I know how to use them correctly because some of the proper authorities taught me after they... retired."

"It sounds like you're using 'retired' as a euphemism."

"Well, long story, and it doesn't make my teachers look anywhere near as cool as they really are. Suffice it to say, it wasn't their idea."

"Are they crooks?"

"Depends who you ask. Can I go?"

"Wait, you can at least tell me your name! And how to actually help ghosts!"

"My name is Inoue Sora, and any mortal intervention into the world of the dead is doomed to cause pain to _everyone. _That's all the help I can give you."

"Okay. Will I ever see you again?"

Sora hesitated.

"Not sure. Mortals say it's a small world, but they haven't seen the afterlife, and by the time you get there, something might have happened to me anyway. Maybe I'll seeya."

"Wait! One last question... will... will the proper authorities arrest me?"

"I doubt it. They don't have anywhere near enough spare men to investigate every medium in the mortal world." He decided not to mention that if they did investigate, and he'd been backsliding, they might kill him. "Goodbye."

He vanished.

Not realizing that the mics _were_ amplifying his voice, and that his sister, and Yasutora Sado, had heard his entire half of the conversation.

_**My brother's a superhero!...**_

_But why was Ichigo fighting him? And what was that thing the man with the funny hat hit me with when I asked? And who's going to believe this?_

"Inoue-san."

"Yes, Sado-kun?"

"Did you used to know someone named 'Inoue Sora?'"

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo\**_

"Damn it. Now the media's going after Karakura Town in droves. Hope Chris Rock is happy." Shinji sat low in his chair, his hand covering his eyes, but it was obvious the expression on his face was miserable.

"So, I should have left Kanonji to it?"

Shinji tried to smile. "No, you did the right thing, but they're all wondering what could have scared him as much as you did, leading to those damn camera crews being all fucking over, and the _whole world's eyes _being on this place, making it a really bad place if we want to fight a war. No good deed goes unpunished, Sora. Remember that."

"Hm." Kensei thought for a second, then snapped his fingers. "I got something."

"What?" Sora looked up, glad someone had a solution.

"A couple UFO sightings. All in the same area, over a week at least. We know those are just blasts of reiatsu from shinigami activities showing up on camera, why not arrange some somewhere comfortably far off?"

"Like where?" Lisa wasn't looking at her book, for once.

Sora pulled up a map. It took him about two minutes. "Shiastokan looks good. All the airports are a comfortable distance away, so we should he able to find enough time slots with no planes going over it if we look at the civilian and military schedules close enough. And to us it's the equivalent of a mile's walk."

"Where's that?"

"Near the sea of Okhotsk."

"That might work. If those assholes in charge of Russia don't make things difficult for the reporters. Or us. They probably won't, but they're getting unpredictable..."

Lisa shrugged. "Something this big, I don't think they'll interfere with the paparazzi. They aren't Myanmar. As for interfering with us... we can make ourselves really hard to find when we need to."

"Point taken."

"Okay. We'll want to throw out some cero, and make sure not to hit anything. Well, unless a hollow gets nosy... Anyway, I think we should try to to get lodgings there, so we don't have to keep traveling back and forth."

"Got it." Shinji groaned. "Why do those damn mortals have to stick their noses in our business?"

"Human curiosity. Let's just hope it doesn't get them killed."

Kensei rubbed the bridge of his nose. "Yeah. I'll see Urahara about getting lodgings in Russia."

Shinji leaned back in his chair. "Thanks."

**My last one was a little short... but then again, this probably is too.**

**Anyway, please review.**


	60. Fighting Over a New Toy

The cero blazed through the skies as Lisa and Hiyori clicked the cameras.

"Hm. Think these'll show up right?"

"Let's hope. We need to get those damn camwhores out of our home!" Hiyori clicked another one.

Roooarr!!

A yeti-looking hollow burst out of the snow, looking for what was going on, and saw the two of them clicking like mad.

Luckily, they had their gikongan dispensers, and Hiyori jumped out of her body as it jumped towards them.

"Well, looks like these guys can go out without showing any fear, huh?"

"Pick it back up."

"Right!" She started clicking again.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Okay, these are the taicho of the Thirteen Court Guardian Divisions. Which would you like to study under?" Yamamoto gestured to the assembled soldiers, each of whom had a subordinate or two at their shoulders. "Before you ask, I spend all my time on administrative duties. Unless you wish to learn that, I cannot help you."

He gestured to Soifon. "Okay, what can you teach me?"

"What you're smart enough to learn."

Ichigo grimaced. "You know, I'm actually one of the best students in my school..."

"... which makes all the difference in the next life."

"Soifon-taicho, this young man is probably the best student you will ever be offered. Alienating him is not an intelligent move. Though I admit academic success in Karakura High has little relevance here."

"Can you do martial arts at all?"

"Well, this isn't relevant here either, but..."

"Yes or no?"

Ichigo fell into a mortal martial arts stance.

"Hm. Well, that'll help against mortal bullies, if they don't have a weapon..."

"Actually, some of the ones I took from this stance had knives and bats, broken bottles, one freak actually tried me with some shuriken..."

"From that stance? If that's what you can do, I think you might have some hope. Any guns?"

"With mortal martial arts? If they had, we'd have had this conversation by now!"

"Point taken."

"Alright... what do you have, fox-face?"

_He's not even trying to hide that he knows... I can teach the sonofabitch some poker face!_

_Actually, he isn't too bad... I doubt anyone could tell if they weren't looking..._

_No, Soifon can tell... hope I'm imagining that!_

_No, she just expected him to be afraid, because I scare everyone..._

_But Ukitake's not that cynical... he can't tell, can he?..._

He went through all these thoughts in half a second, and quickly recovered.

"Take out your sword and go into a fighting stance."

Ichigo complied.

"Swing."

Ichigo slashed at the air.

"Hm... given the level your technique looks to be at... not much."

_This'd be pretty cool, if he wasn't out to kill me._

"Okay, next, what are you good at?"

"My division handles menial labor and healing."

"Okay, no. Can't do complicated binding spells and I'd just as soon stay away from the other stuff. Uh... sorry about your taicho... anyway, can you teach me anything?"

"How much kido do you know?"

"Binding one. Destruction one, four, thirty-one."

"I can teach you a lot, then." She gave an uneasy grin.

"Hm... sixth division... you can teach me how to piss Hiyori off, I know that much."

"Well... I deserve that assessment. I'm refining my technique... I regret to say I've been letting the side effects of those serums distract me from my duties... I'd rather not volunteer to be responsible for you, too."

"Is it just that, or are you an asshole too?"

"Partially that. But I'd like to think I'm improving."

"I'll leave you to that. Hm. Looks live seventh division can teach me some bodybuilding techniques."

"I already look like this."

"Damn. Some people have all the luck. How's the weather up there?"

"It's raining."

Most of the taicho smiled.

"Eighth Division... are you really that good?"

"Hm. Well, I try not to be, but I can't help it... it's really a pain being so famous..."

"Whatever. Can you teach me anything?"

"I guess... my sword style involves being ambidextrous, so that's out... kido's so self-explanatory to me that I can't really explain any spell mechanics... same with hand to hand..."

"So, nothing doing?"

"Sorry."

"Ninth is down one taicho too, he tried to stop Zaraki from escaping, right?"

"Well, tried to splatter him all over the wall is more wha' 'e tried to do. I mean, I was there, you should ask me..."

Hisagi growled. "Shut up, fox-face."

"Wow, 'Isagi! I never knew you had the guts to insult a superior officer!" Said superior officer grinned. "Tosen'd be so proud of you!"

"Listen, you piece..."

"**Enough**! Hitsugaya-taicho, if you would?"

"You can teach me to dodge hado spells, right Toshiro?"

"That's Hitsugaya-taicho, Kurosaki-san. And yes, if you don't already know then I think I can teach you."

"Okay, I'll keep that in mind. You were Zaraki-san's subordinate, right? So that means you can teach me zanjutsu?"

Madarame smiled as he looked over his brand new (he had to get it that way, because Zaraki kept his) haori. "Yeah, and we can also teach you how to have fun!"

"How?"

"Living to fight, drinking as much as you want..."

"I think I'll pass, frat-boy." He turned to the Kurotsuchi. "You can teach me how to make that healing stuff, right? I gotta admit that sounds cool..."

"That is only the tip of the iceberg!"

"Wow. Okay, got anything else cool?"

"Well, we have a device designed to make spirits visible to ordinary humans, we have device to alter the appearance of zanpakuto spirits, we have dummy hollows used for target practice, we have an immobilization toxin I developed while trying to create a potion to increase combat skills..."

"Okay, I think I can choose now. If you can teach me how to make that toxin, I'll work under you."

The chamber burst into an uproar.

"Are you a fool? Your potential as a martial artist will be completely wasted!"

"But, don't you want to learn more about kido!? You only know one binding spell!" Hinamori's tone was a little bit too eager.

"Come on! Don't you wanna learn how to have fun?!"

"You know, you didn't even hear me out, and I do need a new fukutaicho. I could groom you for the role, and to eventually succeed me when I retire."

"Heh, sorry, but I think I could do some real good on the field if I knew how to make that healing stuff and the knockout poison..."

"Oh, the best part is, their still conscious! They just can't move!"

Ichigo grimaced. "Well, it still sounds useful..."

Ukitake spoke up again. "And what of your potential as a combatant? Your actual skills won't increase to any noticeable extent under Kurotsuchi-taicho..."

"What I do _**is**__ a skill!"_

"Of a sort."

"_**What the hell does THAT**_ mean**!?"**

"It means that any sufficiently intelligent man with enough moral laxity could probably do the things you do."

"**I am the only sufficiently intelligent man! And I object to the phrase '**_**moral laxity!**_**'"**

Soifon dearly wished that the "maggot's nest" was not secret, but it was. Thus, she could not warn Ichigo of it, and the only inmate she ever remembered having released from it, until he'd already made the right choice.

If he did.

She could try to get the basics across, though.

"We all know that Kurotsuchi-taicho is insane. You should choose someone else."

Ichigo tried to smile... "This'll be easy..."

**Please r&r.**


	61. Being A Man Is Hard Work

_**Week One**_

Sunday: Free time

Monday: Martial Arts with Special Forces

Tuesday: Poker lessons with 3rd division higher-ups, and 10th fukutaicho

Wednesday: Science Lessons with 12th division (mechanics emphasized)

Thursday: Science Lessons with 12th division (poisons emphasized)

Friday: Hado Lessons with Fifth Division

Saturday: Zanjutsu Lessons With Eleventh Division higher ups and 6th fukutaicho

_**Week Two**_

Sunday: Free Time

Monday: Martial Arts with Special Forces

Tuesday: Administrative Duties practice with 13th division

Wednesday: Science Lessons with 12th division (poisons emphasized)

Thursday: Administrative Duties Practice with 12th Division

Friday: Hado Lessons with Fifth Division

Saturday: Zanjutsu Lessons With Eleventh Division higher ups and 6th fukutaicho

_**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO**_

_**XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO**_

"Why do I have to take poker lessons again?"

The gikongan victim smiled at him."Because I want some easy money, kid. And it'll be fun to drain your pockets."

"I had no idea that pill would do that!"

"And the next time my subordinate suffers because you don't test your equipment, I'll hand you over to Ichimaru-taicho."

They heard a sneeze behind them.

"So, what's this I hear about a pill doing something?"

"This kid's gikongan tried to have it's way with me after he hit me with a binding spell!"

Gin's smiled slipped a little bit, and his sword hand gave a noticeable twitch.

_You son of a bitch..._

"Oh, come on Gin-kun! You don't need to kill him, after all, the two of us and Kira-kun are about to break his piggy bank!"

"True enough."

Gin's smile didn't go back to normal all day.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

_**Four days later**_

"So, what were you going to do with your day off?" Soifon-taicho had a cool look on her face. It was fairly obvious she wasn't very comfortable with the notion of resting one day out of seven, especially since she knew Ichigo didn't have any religious reason to do so. As far as she knew he didn't even have a religion...

"Try to get Yamamoto-soutaicho to let me off working with the frat-boy division."

He had started on a Wednesday, meaning that he'd started right off with learning how to work with Soul Society's machines. He gotta admit, they had some pretty cool ones. The poisons were pretty cool too, but he'd have to remember to come up with some that were a little more merciful. So far, he'd learned two to immobilize the enemy, but neither one dulled the pain receptors. The one that worked by fucking your perception of time actually made them _more_ sensitive! It's only polite to make it so they can't feel your blade hit their throat, right?

Still, he'd picked up _a lot_ during those two lessons. Being a crazy mofo doesn't seem to mean you can't teach!

Hinamori was kind of nervous, which was understandable with the work she was doing. Still, he'd been casting 33 fairly well by the time he'd left.

He had, of course, left a completely abandoned forest in North 4, not the division HQ. Fairly well is a relative term, and when it is used to refer to Ichigo and a Hado spell...

If they were ever trying to find a place to put North 81, Ichigo could tell them where to look!

But then there were the frat-boys.

He had to admit they were improving his reflexes, and teaching him a couple of moves he probably couldn't learn with _**any**_ other teacher, but he'd really rather not have to wonder whether he was going to walk away from his practice sessions or not!

The best part was half an hour after practice, when he and Renji were trying to talk to their blade spirits. They actually thought they were making progress trying to get them to leave their minds and enter the outside world. Kind of remarkable, given that almost nobody ever came close...

But the rest of that, he could probably do without, particularly given how he was already stronger than the Eleventh Division, after his sword practice with Urahara. The only thing they had that he didn't was that they knew a couple of interesting moves that could potentially save Ichigo's ass!

"Actually, on second thought, it is doing me some good. I just wish they'd be a little less serious about it!"

"So, do you want to get started on that martial arts training?"

"No, I want to take a _really_ long nap. Those guys did their best to work me into the dirt!"

"In case you're wondering, I won't be any better."

Ichigo groaned. "God damn it."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Yaaah!"

Ichigo swung his foot down, and watched as Soifon's swung out at him.

He collapsed to the ground, struggling not to cry. Soifon gave a sickening grin.

"It's bad enough when a woman leaves an opening there. Men _really_ shouldn't."

She then effortlessly blocked a punch that could have opened the doors at Fort Knox, stopped a kick that could have broken Washington's stone skull at Mt. Rushmore, and sidestepped a chop that most shinigami couldn't have stopped with their shikai.

"Oh, are you mad?"

That didn't really describe it... it was taking every ounce of discipline Ichigo had not to cast a hado, or reach for Zangetsu.

_**JESUS CHRIST! AT LEAST MADARAME NEVER DID THAT!**_

Soifon-taicho sent a foot into his chest, sending him back a couple of yards, only to smile as he got back up on his feet, and came right back at her.

"If this is what it takes to get you serious, maybe I should attack those things at the start of every session!"

Ichigo only started fighting harder.

Ichigo took the kick at 12:30 pm, ten minutes after lunch.

It was 12:45 at night before he stopped trying to kill his sensei, and limped to the 4th division HQ.

"Soifon-taicho really did that?! Those things must be made of steel!"

"Yeah, now can you fix 'em?"

"Not through your pants."

Ichigo groaned. "Damn it."

He dropped his outfit, and let Isane-fukutaicho handle them a little.

"They aren't injured that bad, considering she really kicked like she meant it. You're lucky she didn't leave you a eunuch, like she did the last guy who she kicked there during a spar." _Of course, Ichigo probably didn't use it as an excuse to try and feel her up..._

"Can you fix 'em?"

"Sure."

"Can you do it without anyone else feeling them?"

"Of course."

"Thank kami."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Rukia sat down beside her friend. "So, how has your education been going so far?"

He gave her a flat look.

"Is there going to be any combat practice today?"

"No, just paperwork..."

"Thank kami! These guys are monsters! Madarame was really trying to kill me, and Soifon almost castrated me with that damn right foot of hers! Why the hell is the mad scientist the only sane one around here?!"

Rukia looked disturbed for a second "Well, I guess now you know where _not_ to leave an opening next time!"

Ichigo's face began to darken...

"Oh, hi! Kurosaki-san, right?"

Ichigo looked down at the girl who asked.

"Yeah, that's me."

"You remember my sister?"

"No. Should I?

"She says you have the biggest balls she's ever seen!"

Ichigo had to take a moment to recover from that one.

"Uh... yeah, I'm surprised they didn't fall off though. I mean, I only showed em to her because Soifon tried to flatten the things. Heh..."

"Neesan says they weren't actually hurt that bad, she just dulled the pain. She didn't really need to touch them to do that, so she pretended to heal them because she wanted to see if they felt as good as they looked!"

The room was silent for about five seconds.

Rukia got up. "If you two will excuse me..."

She closed the door, and walked out of the building.

And fell on the ground laughing her ass off.

**Sorry to anybody who doesn't like the whole student at 12th division thing, but I've got a really cool machine in my head, that nobody that Ichigo would make, and nobody except Mayuri could teach him to make.**

**It's going to be called The Tempest Of Strife. I probably shouldn't have given that away, because that might ruin the surprise.**

**I promise it's worth putting up with having Mayuri as a teacher.**

**Please review.**


	62. Hearing Is Always The Last

**Readers beware: I rated this thing "M"**

Ichigo tried to learn the administrative stuff, but it was hard to concentrate...

_That kid really shouldn't know anything about my damn balls! Good thing this didn't spawn some weird argument with her friend, I don't really want to think how that would have ended up..._

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

**That same instant**

The two adjuchas sat on the ruins of the tree where the rival adjuchas had been hiding.

They made sure to only target renegades, hollows who had rebelled against the forest guardians.

Said guardians could not have sent those menos just to test their control. (Though it did end up doing just that...)

Point is, they had to have been sent for a reason. The guardians could not be pleased that the attack on wherever it was had been foiled, and they had to be hunting for the killers who had thwarted it.

The only possible counter was to keep hunting renegades, and killing others who the forest guardians hated, hoping to gain forgiveness, or at least have it called even, by the time they encountered the guardians.

If not, they still needed the power of the renegades, because the only other way to grow in power while in the forest of menos was to get the power of other hollows by targeting the guardians themselves, or other hollows loyal to them, which would push hunting the pair of renegades to the top priority in the guardians "to-do" list.

Shrieker had learned much from his new friend, who he had learned was named "Rudobon." It seemed the guardians were taking orders from a rogue shinigami, Aizen Sosuke, who had yet to show the other shinigami his true colors. (Most of the hollows knew this, but good luck getting a shinigami to listen to any of them!) This rogue had control of the forest through his loyal guardians, and had had a fortress built on the surface. "Las Noches," Rudobon thought he had called it. Had they not ended up gaining a conspicuous place on the list of his enemies, Rudobon admitted he might have ended up attempting to gain this "Aizen's" favor.

There was another shinigami with a base in Hueco Mundo: a shinigami named Ashido, who, as far as anyone could tell, had lost his connection with Seireitei, but remained on their side, trying to kill as many hollows as he could. (Some suspected he was really a criminal hiding out, and that he killed hollows because there was nothing else to do here, and to avoid dying, but nobody really knew for sure.) Where he slept, what he ate, how he lived, nobody knew, making him a fairly scary figure: he was a shinigami who didn't need creature comforts. Even the low-ranking ones needed food, a soft bed, and company. Only monsters could go without! But nobody had ever seen Ashido eat, nobody thought he had any company other than that damn sword of his, and to make things even scarier, he wore masks from dead hollows as trophies. That had helped scare most of the hollows who were not aligned with the forest guardians out of the forest. But not Shrieker, and not Rudobon.

The forest was a dangerous place, but neither of them wanted to leave.

Danger is the only path to power. Danger is the only path to the third stage.

Danger is the only way to become a vasto lorde.

And with Aizen's men after them, the third stage was the only power that could protect them, if the shit hit the fan....

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

**The next day...**

"So, do you think you have a viable poison, Kurosaki-san?" It was a mark of how much Ichigo had piqued Mayuri's curiosity that he was getting "san" on the end of his name.

"I think so..."

"Then let's test it on a hollow."

"Sure."

They, along with the silent, hard to notice fukutaicho, went down a staircase, and found themselves in a huge room full of cages. Each hollow had their own cage, and each cage had enough room for a couple of shinigami, and the hollow.

"Now, apply the poison."

Ichigo and Zangetsu didn't really like this part. It was, in a way, fun coming up with the poisons, but not fun putting them on Zangetsu's blade.

Ichigo took a brush, and ran it along the business edge, shuddering a little bit at the feel as it touched his reiatsu.

"Okay."

Ichigo took the key, unlocked the door, and nicked the hollow's arm a little.

He kicked it back, and it flew into the back of the cell...

...or would have done, had it not evaporated from the poison the instant before it hit the wall.

"Quick death. Not my style, but still effective. Now onto ways of mass-producing compounds known to have desirable effects, the lesson which seems most appropriate at this stage..."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

**Six Days Later**

Ichimaru-taicho kept his usual smile as he looked through his poker hand.

And as he read the cards, his smile widened. Not much, but any shinigami above tenth seat would have been observant enough to catch it. He pushed in a neat little stack of bills.

Izuru and Ichigo saw this, and quickly folded.

Matsumoto grinned, and said "I'm in. Raise." She pushed in about three times as much as he just had.

Ichimaru showed the ace of hearts, and gave Matsumoto the rest of his hand. She gave him four new cards, which he registered no reaction to.

Matsumoto grinned like however-you-spell-that-cat..

"How'd you know he was bluffing?!"

"Because he's better than that at hiding it when he's got your ass. He was trying to scare you guys when he grinned wider. Besides, whatever he had, the chances of it being worse than mine were next to zilch. But then again, that's still true."

"You're bluffing too."

She patted Gin on the head like he was a tame fox. "Think that if you want, Gin-kun."

"Where'd Kurosaki-san get the money for this, anyway?"

"Weekly stipend. Plus, I got attacked by a hollow named Grand Fisher the day before I came here. My father and I killed him, so I put in a claim for half the bounty on him. Fifty years of running from you guys will put a price on a hollow's head, let me tell you. Not to mention I got the whole thing for another hollow, Fishbone D, who attacked me at my house the day I met Rukia. The whole thing wasn't as much as half of Fisher's though."

"So, you killed Grand Fisher? That is a stunt. Even half the bounty on him'll do it."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

**That night... in South 68**

"Hanza! Where are you?!"

There was no answer. Kibune Makoto tried to keep the frustration he was feeling off of his face.

"Hanza!"

_Damn it! Where the hell is he?_

"Oh, there you are, Makoto-san."

"Hanza! Why were you... hiding..."

He suddenly felt a reiatsu suppression spell lift, and realized he was surrounded by assassins.

"_If you and that asshole Kumoi wanted to __**betray**__ me, you __**really**__ should have brought more than __**this**__, you"_ his sword came out as an angry, silvery flash, and he reached into his left pocket _"__**freaking mor**__-u__**uu**__**UUUMMM!!!!**_"

He felt a hand clap over his mouth, and the same second brought a burning, paralyzing sensation in his chest. Looking down, he saw a bloodied blade poking out of the front of his chest, slightly to his left.

Seeing the blade made it feel even more real. He would have screamed in pain as he slumped, if it were not for the hand that, given it's positioning, could only have been his killer's left. (Not that Kibune was in any shape to deduce this.)

The blade pulled out of his heart, and he flopped like a hooked fish for a couple of seconds, struggling to scream despite his killer's precaution and then started to leave the second life for the first.

When someone dies, the power to feel pain is always the first thing to go, then the power to feel, then the power to see.

"You really were the better choice for an ally, weren't you, Aizen-san?"

Hearing is always the last.

**Please review.**


	63. Another Front Opened

**The next day...**

Any written records Aizen had kept of his plans were written in Las Noches, Hueco Mundo, and they never left the place. Gin and Tosen were told of this precaution, and told to hold to it as well. If Aizen had not taken this precaution, and held his subordinates to it as well, he would have been a fool, and whatever his faults, he was not a fool.

As such, being hidden in a tavern in South 68, disguised as a weak peasant, waiting for an opportunity to enter Seireitei, he could not write anything at all, even though he wasn't sure how many people could read in this place.

Still it was smarter not to write anything.

So he made this list in his head, not on paper.

_**Strategic Gains Since Plan Went Awry**_

-Backup Plan Enacted With No Resistance So Far

-Now believed dead

-Zaraki no longer in Seireitei

_**Strategic Losses Since Plan Went Awry**_

-Central 46 illusion now seen through

-Orb Of Distortion surely no longer in Kuchiki's soul, and no sure indication where it is

-Yamamoto now surely aware of trumped up charges against vizard

-Tosen is dead (if I can do without his help, that might actually end up being a gain, no indication he wasn't planning to betray me, and his motive would seem to eventually demand it)

-New players in game: Kurosaki and the poison vizard, no clue as to their current or potential abilities, except that they are both powerful enough to be a problem (until I get the orb, then they're dust, assuming that they don't force me to kill them while they attempt to defend it)

-Zaraki and Yachiru's new power, _might_ be able to defeat them with Gin's help after I get the orb

"So, you said you had a scheme for us to help you with?"

"Hai. First, I must gain the bakkotu that can suppress shinigami abilities. I may need that power to complete my goals, and even if I do not use it, I cannot allow anyone else to have such a weapon."

"Amagai's patrol squad cannot know of this meeting, therefore, he'll try to distract them with another lead and come here alone. After that, you must kill him before he sees a need to use his gift from us, or you may be beyond our help in seconds."

"He was not present at the ceremony I used to hypnotize the Gotei 13, therefore, I will need to depend on my stealth abilities, just as I did for Kibune."

"Will it be enough?"

"Yes."

"You are sure?"

"Amagai is around the level of the average taicho. All he lacks is a bankai. I have far more power than that."

"And you can do it without him releasing his bakkotu?"

"I know something about the mindset he's going to have. He and I are planning something similar, after all... He'll keep _that_ hidden as long as he can. By the time he realizes it's the only way he can win, he'll be dead. One more thing, that trap I fabricated for you?"

"You mean that kido bomb we put under that bridge?"

"That's all wanted to hear. Thank you."

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**That Afternoon...**

Amagai was not wearing his uniform. He was not calling Kibune's name. He didn't want to draw attention, and he was assuming he could find Kibune based on reiatsu. Just how the living fuck was Hanza going to win if he did betray Kibune, and what in this district could possibly register as a threat to either of them, let alone both and Hanza's men working together? And thus, since nothing in this district could kill or even defeat Kibune, he could find him with reiatsu, right?

He hadn't realized that Hanza and Kumoi had a new, more powerful ally. All he realized was that, if he hadn't been feeling intensely for his subordinate's power, he would never have felt the shinigami (he could tell this was one, not just some dumbass bandit, but the signature was either unfamiliar or too well hidden to be recognizable) creeping up stealthily behind him on the rooftops.

District 68 or not, he really didn't want to kill someone in the streets, too damn many witnesses if you are anywhere better than 71. Past that, there is no chance of anyone caring enough to try and have you lynched.

Here, however, there might be some would-be reformer trying to create a semblance of law and order, probably based around himself _being_ law and order. Or worse, whoever this was might have friends, maybe including everyone around them. Amagai pondered these possibilities, and decided to slip into the nearest alley, making sure not to put a hand on his sword or face where he knew the ambush was coming from until he was out of sight.

His eyebrows raised as he saw a man who looked like a common Rukongai thug drop down from the roofs.

The man raised a sword and jumped forward. The blade was stabbed through Amagai before he knew it.

The would-be thug kicked him backwards, and he flew into a wall. Amagai felt the wound. Even with the blade pulled out, the wound wouldn't be dangerous to anyone besides a common mortal.

He had aimed right for a non-vital point. This son of a bitch was a good shot.

He raised his blade, and Amagai noted the expression on his face. It was a look of concentration, seen on a shinigami only when he's using kido somewhere near the limits of what he can do, or letting out a bankai.

Or, in rare cases, letting out a shikai without a command phrase.

Three possibilities, none of them really nice.

He then realized that he recognized the reiatsu...

_**Fuck me!**_

Amagai reached for his tuning-fork-looking-bakkotu with his left hand. A badass shinigami like Aizen is still a shinigami, and that meant...

Amagai felt a blade stab through his left arm from behind. Right into a nerve.

So much for that possibility.

"Yes, Amagai, I do know what that blade is. And I will obtain it, one way or another."

Amagai stifled a scream as Aizen twisted the blade. He looked at the Aizen in front of him, as it smiled and vanished.

"So, you're the one who killed Kibune. I thought you were dead, but instead, he is."

"Already sure he is dead? Quick on the uptake, I see. I'm guessing you've put it all together. Yes, Kumoi has betrayed you, and yes, I will kill you too, if I have to. Kumoi wanted me to kill you as a pledge of faith, but instead, I can take your bloodstained shirt, and say I destroyed the rest of you and your outfit. I have a place you can hide, until I have use for you."

"Use for me?"

Aizen smiled, and for the first time since he'd donned his peasant disguise, it had a little warmth in it."I hadn't expected you to put that together... I know more about what you want than Kumoi does. You want to avenge your father's death, killing both Kasumiojji and their puppet soutaicho." Aizen didn't really think Amagai would be as useful if he knew what actually happened, so he decided to keep his mouth shut about that.

"And, you can help?"

"Yamamoto is the most powerful obstacle in my path, given that I want to rule Seireitei. Kumoi agreed to help me, but long term, he might be more dangerous than useful. But you... you would be loyal, wouldn't you? All that would need to happen is for me to allow you to kill Kumoi, the princess, and the soutaicho, right?"

"I want to kill them all with my own two hands, slice Raika into all three of them. I imagine that you'll want the bakkotu for yourself as a pledge of faith, and without that I can't personally kill Yamamoto. That's fine, I can handle that. I just want to personally kill the other two, and I want you to promise to kill Yamamoto. And I want to watch him die."

"I already told you, the other two are going to end up being obstacles. And the princess already is. You would also want to kill her bodyguards, I assume. I will also allow you to kill the bakkotu smiths, as soon as everyone else is taken care of, and I have the secrets of forging those blades."

"I'd like that, too. And after they're all dead, you can do whatever you want to me, exile me, kill me, whatever you want."

"Oh, that? I was thinking I'd make you a general, let you pay back the debt I'm putting you in."

Amagai grinned. "That works, too."

"Glad to hear it. Now, to hide you..." Aizen raised his hand. "_In my right hand I hold the stone that connects the borders of the worlds. In my left hand I hold the blade that binds existence. The black-haired shepherd, the seat of the noose. A bank of clouds comes, striking us and the crested ibis._ " Aizen slammed the sheath of his sword into the dirt. Amagai watched as a purple void opened in space.

Aizen stepped through it, and gestured for Amagai to follow. As Amagai stepped through the portal, it vanished. As Aizen walked through the void, a white path appeared under his feet.

It was about three minutes leisurely walking before they came to another portal.

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**That same instant...**

_***BANG!***_

Kasumoijji Lurichiyo screamed as her bodyguards pulled her off an exploding bridge.

"Well, we should be out of danger for..."

Kenryu's danger sense went off. Enryu's didn't.

The small one grabbed the princess and jumped, hoping that his friend would follow.

Bombs under the ground of both sides of the bridge exploded, and then a number of blades formed from the debris, killing Enkogawa "Enryu" Rosaburo instantly.

Lurichyo dropped to her knees, and started weeping.

Kenryu checked his pulse, hardly daring to believe that his senses could be accurate.

"Son of... son of... sonofa ... son of a bitch... _**SON OF A BITCH! I'll KILL YOU!! I'll FUCKING KILL YOU!!!! YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!!!!**_" It took every ounce of concentration Kenryu had to keep himself from directly saying that Kumoi was involved, something that he didn't want his princess to hear. He couldn't stop himself from cursing in front of his princess, which only made him angrier...

"Come with me, Lurichiyo-sama. There's something we need to do."

"Does it involve why there was a kido trap under the bridge we were walking on?"

_Oh well. _"Yes. Yes it does."

"Are you going to punish the son of a bitch who cost us our friend?"

_**Damn it! **_"Princesses shouldn't use that kind of language, Lurichiyo-sama."

"And their bodyguards shouldn't teach it to them. So, what are you going to do to that piece of shit?"

"I can't do much. His bodyguards are better than me. But there's something you can do..."

"What's that?"

"You are aware that every bill of your family fortune is yours, right?"

"Hai. Most of the things in here are ours."

"Well, let me show you some interesting games you can play if you have enough money..."

"We don't want to play games. Playtime is _over_."

Kenryu gave her a pained smile. "Well, despite everything I did to shield you, I gotta admit you have the instinct for this. We have to arrange a funeral for Enryu. I think that's when we should strike. Come on, Lurichiyo-sama... it's time for your first shocking, bloody, Godfather-style political smackdown."

"Can we watch a movie first? We want to get some ideas..."

"Well, I think I could use some inspiration, too... Servants! Help, our friend is hurt!"

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**An hour later...**

"Okay, someone might check through these books later, Lurichyo-sama. That's why we aren't marking what we want to use this money for."

"But will getting caught hiring a hitman really look that bad? You said all the noble families did at at least one point in their existences..."

"Hai. But they make sure not to get caught. Besides, the Kuchiki haven't hired a hit in the last three centuries, so they would have the right to look down us, even though it's probably because the last family stupid enough to attack them tried to kill a man named 'Kuchiki Ginrei', who then proceeded to send about a quarter of the sixth division into their estate."

"And nobody will suspect us if they see a blank entry?"

"Better that than they know."

"You are correct. One further question... are we still better than Kumoi? We are, correct?"

"Yes, I think we are. As you no doubt recall, he has already attempted to kill you, and in the process, Enryu died."

"I see. Do you have a hitman in mind?"

"Yes, I do."

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**That evening...**

"I don't do hired hits."

"But you're an outlaw!"

"There are outlaws who disobey unjust laws, but steer clear of fair ones, outlaws who steal, but don't kill, and there are outlaws who kill for what they think is a good reason, but wouldn't dream of killing for pay. I'm the last kind."

"But, Urahara-san! If this goes as planned, then... Kumoi will take over the Kasumojji family assets! Do you want scum like him to have power like that, knowing what he does!? I thought I told you what bakkotu are like..."

"I have problems of my own. Not only big ones, like the crisis around Aizen's death, but business is suffering because my suppliers can't get enough of a certain type of spirit particle..."

"Type C?"

Urahara started to look interested.

"Do bakkotu use it?"

"Of course. Bakkotu are organic, semi-living beings. It's only natural that they use spirit particle type C. It's like encountering an animal and asking if it needs carbon to live!"

"And he's getting as much as he needs?"

"If he has time to worry about killing hime-sama, I'd say, very probably."

"And that will be a lot?"

"I imagine so."

"So, he's the reason behind one of the problems on my plate?"

"He's almost certainly contributing."

Urahara's face took on a very dark look.

"Then the least I'll want to do is have your friend healed, and I'll probably do more than that..."

"He is dead. Did Kenryu-san not make that clear?" The princess spoke for the first time, through a _ridiculous_ hat that would _nobody_ would be willing to wear unless it was doing something rather important...

"I think you are underestimating my means. Just because someone is dead doesn't mean they can't be healed, it just means conventional medicine is worthless. I will have to ask Utsoda Hachigen to take a look at him, but he can be brought back."

"Thank you, Urahara-san! And will you ensure that he does not die again?"

"I can try. Were you planning to go back to the Kasumiojji residence after these negotiations?"

"Hai, Urahara-san."

"Well don't. I'll send someone to pick Enryu up, neither of you go back."

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**That night...**

"Put that damn cadaver down!"

"Make me, you simian-looking old corpse!"

"Guards!"

In short order, the three intruders (Hiyori, Sora and Rose, both wearing ninja outfits) were surrounded by uniformed Kasumiojji guards. (Not the ninja, the legitimate ones.)

"Okay, you made me." Sarugaki handed the corpse completely to Rose. "Carry that back yourself, the newbie and I can handle this crowd."

Kumoi chuckled. "'Handle' us? You'll 'handle' us, will you? You know, the last thief to break in here showed us a lot more respect!"

The guards closed in. Rose shunpoed away with the body, while Hiyori punched one of the weird fork-looking spears they were holding, rendering it completely useless.

Sora raised his hand, two fingers straight, the others bent. "Bakudo: Number One... Restrain!"

The guards all took the spell, and fell over, with their hands bound.

Kumoi looked around. "All right. You two have some skill."

Hiyori coughed.

More guards started pouring in.

Sora glanced towards the senkaimon. It had closed, and Rose was nowhere to be seen. Given Rose's speed, that could only mean he was on the right side of it. "All right, backup plan time!"

The two remaining vizard jumped into the air and over the walls of the compound, moving as fast as they could for West 2, and the location of the other gate.

They started in South 5, so it wasn't a long journey, but in about South 3 they noticed the ninja following them.

Sora glanced at Hiyori, and she smiled. She held up six fingers, and then pointed behind them.

He nodded, relieved that they hadn't realized how outmatched they would be only using six. A bum rush might make them show something unique, like a hollow mask or a shikai. They didn't need to get recognized doing something like this...

She held up four fingers, put one down, and then another.

_Two, one, GO!_

Both of them shunpoed backwards with an elbow held out behind. They slammed into the two ninja immediately behind them, knocking both immediate targets out cold, and putting them behind the four other idiots. Another shunpo and two punches each, and they were completely unpursued.


	64. Zankiri

"So, you're the newest vizard?"

"Hai. And you'd be Zankiri-sama?"

"Yes. You're here because you need the use of our senkaimon."

"Yes."

Zankiri-sama was a rather uninspiring man. He was a few pounds north of healthy, to say the least, and a little southwest of confident-looking.

"Can you spare a moment? I want to talk to you alone."

"Of course." Hiyori left for a lounge, doing the courteous thing without being asked, for once.

"You're Urahara's newest ally..."

"I think Zaraki and Yachiru share that distinction. I'm new, but they're newer."

"Oh, of course. Yes, they went through my house, I should remember..."

Sora felt uncomfortable. It wasn't because of the expensive surroundings, (though those didn't help, Sora had never had much money himself, and was never friends with anyone who did, and thus had never gotten used to decorations that looked like they cost more than 300,000 yen per item) but because of a distinct feel of discomfort he felt rising off of the noble.

"They were murderers."

"Didn't sound like it to me..."

"Did you hear the story?"

"Yeah, probably more detail than you did. Zaraki made sure I understood he considered himself a killer, but from the sound of how it actually happened, it sounded like it was more Tosen's doing..."

"_Tosen's doing?!_" Zankiri-sama looked shocked.

"Yeah, he tried to kill Zaraki, but Zaraki unconsciously redirected the spirit pressure, and that was the end of it."

"And he died. And he and his partner in crime came through here. And were followed."

"It worked out, didn't it?"

Zankiri-sama sighed. He decided to just come right out and say it. "I don't know if I trust Urahara."

"Why not?"

"He's a criminal, and he asked us to aid and abet a fugitive. And now this, carrying a body for reanimation, and going against Kasumiojii."

"I thought he'd told you the whole story?" Sora was starting to give Zankiri-san a really suspicious look.

"He's... the explanation is... Urahara... wants us... me and you... to buy something pretty incredible..."

"I've seen the evidence. An illusion that fools my friends and the shinigami, but Ryuken-san, Ichigo-san and I can see through. And hollows that attacked at a time when creatures of that nature would have been fleeing the country."

"And you know that your friends are fooled because? And there are ways to attract hollows, even into a situation that they know they can't survive..."

Now _that_ was the kind of question Sora had never liked to hear. "What are you saying?"

"How do you know that your friends can be trusted?" Somehow, Zankiri-san seemed to know that Sora wouldn't want to answer this.

"I have a senkaimon to catch." He walked into the lounge. "Time to go."

"You okay, Sora?"

"I think so."

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"**Guess who's back on the scene? Already got the grammy, been had the green..."**

"Guys?"

"**...stickin' out my jeans, money..."**

"Yeah?" Rose switched off the stereo he, Shinji, and Urahara were listening to. Somehow, he knew from the look on Sora's face that this was going to be an important conversation.

"When I was talking to the Zankiri lord, he seemed to be trying to say I shouldn't trust you guys."

"Really?" Urahara didn't look moved. He seemed to be expecting this. "I've been having doubts about him.... "

"Really?"

"Yes. He fired two or three servants I'd introduced him to. They said he'd looked pretty out-of-it when he'd fired them. He said he should never have taken servants on someone else's suggestion. They didn't know what to make of it. Neither did I, but now..."

"You're afraid of which side he might really be on?"

"Yeah. Did he give you any concrete reasons why he didn't trust us?"

"He mentioned Zaraki. I already heard that story, and apparently better than he had, so..."

"He also said this whole situation was just... too incredible."

Everyone chuckled sourly. Shinjii was the one who spoke next. "You know, he has a point there. I don't know just how the hell we got the shinigami to believe us."

"They snooped on us, and got the whole story."

"Oh yeah. Maybe we should've let Zankiri find out that way..."

"So, you think he'll try to stab us in the back?" Sora had been worried since the conversation.

"He might. He might be too scared, he might be too scared not too, he might decide calmly that it's in his best interest to do it or not do it. If he's not sure which he'll do yet, I think the best thing to do is to pretend not to be suspicious and just trust him, even if it carries risks of it's own." Shinji started rubbing his temples.

Sora groaned."Great. This is making me feel really confident. Did resurrecting that guy go well, at least?"

Urahara rejoined the conversation. "Yeah. Even if we have problems with the noble houses, we've got us some more allies now. That's something."

"That's something, all right."

**Please review.**


	65. The Cunning Plan

Slash block, duck slash roll. JUMP!

Kensei shunpoed away, and Sora sensed instead of feeling a shot to a nonvital part of his back.

But just barely. A millisecond later, and Kensei'd have hit.

Sora shunpoed behind his sparring partner, and aimed a kick at the side of his head.

He watched Kensei disappear, and jumped to the side just in time to avoid a punch to the back of his head.

His mask shattered before he could think where to aim for next.

SLAM!

"Hiyori?"

"Three hours, forty minutes. Do we need to keep beating this guy? I mean, it's fun to watch, but how many fights is he going to need to hold it longer than that?"

"Well, how do you suggest we let him use the time? Ripping his hand off?"

"Oh, I stopped doing that?"

"So, you gave up on that attack?"

Sora gave an evil smile.

"See that rock?"

"Yeah?"

Sora brought down the mask.

"Escopeta!"

There was a flash of dark energy. When the dust cleared, the rock looked like Swiss Cheese.

"How'd you do it?!"

"Oh, I worked on a similar attack to build up my control."

"Can I see that one?" Hiyori asked.

"Sure. Revólver."

Six quick flashes of light, and another rock had six holes through it.

"Hm. Can you teach us those?"

"Think you can compress your power enough? That's the secret, after that, throwing a whole bunch isn't too hard."

"For you."

"Well, let's see if you can do it..."

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The three guests looked down on this scene."

"Well, we've certainly met some unusual people..."

"I know, but Enryu and I can't do anything about that."

"Actually, we do not mind. It is a welcome change to our normal routine. Except for the obvious. Have they made any progress anticipating Kumoi's next move?"

"No, but they have made preparations. Urahara has put me in contact with the family bankers. When we are ready to move, they can freeze the family's assets at ten seconds notice, leaving Kumoi paralyzed, and whatever Urahara can bring out free to act without fear."

"And what can he bring out?"

"Well, look below."

She did.

"We doubt Kumoi's mercenaries can compete with them, particularly in the numbers they are in. Very well. We would feel safer with the Gotei 13 involved, of course."

"I do not feel that necessary, and until it is, I would rather avoid that."

"The family reputation. Very well."

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"Are you quite sure you wish to bother with these men? They are weak!" Kumoi gave his new ally a horrified look. Had he betrayed Amagai for the sake of an _**idiot**_!?

"And thus wish for a more powerful protector. They already have mastered the art of secret mortal warfare, and that is a technique my plans require."

"How could your plans require that?!" _Oh, kami, he's a __**dumbass!**_

"Simple, they require the mortal world to be thrown into chaos, soaking up the shinigami's resources, and they require my new, anti-shinigami weapons to be prepared. Preparing the weapons is the first step, as they can easily throw the mortal world into chaos, simply by destroying a major city. These weapons can be prepared by mortals, and I see no reason to use spirit beings, as they may be tracked."

"_**One city!?**_ Do you really think that a single city can doom the e_**ntire mortal world**_ to chaos!?"

Aizen gave a predatory smile. "Do you know what the 'District Of Colombia' is?"

"No! The knowledge is useless! I know for a fact that it is noplace near as important as you seem to think!"

"It may not be. That's why, after destroying it with my weapon, I'll turn to Richmond, Annapolis, and Baltimore. All near enough to be in range, and follow it in... about a day, I should think."

"You'll disrupt a region, I'll give you that, but you think you can..."

"Hanza, if you would give us a map of The United States Of America, please?"

"Is that in the mortal world?"

"Hai."

"Then we won't have a map of it."

Aizen wasn't surprised at all. "I have one here."

They bent over it. "This is the District of Colombia, this is Richmond, Annapolis, Baltimore."

"And even on this map, they look small," Kumoi stated while wondering why the map looked like a patchwork quilt.

"This whole region" Aizen ran his hand over the country, and Puerto Rico "is controlled by a massive bureaucracy centered in Colombia, a bureaucracy which also has massive influence outside the area it truly controls. There are also regional bureaucracies in this region in green and this one in blue, run in Richmond and Annapolis, respectively. Baltimore is merely a very large city, but it seemed foolish to overlook such a target."

"And they can't function without these bureaucracies? Mortals are less intelligent than I took them for. Maybe your plan will work."

"If it doesn't, the shinigami will still have to work fairly diligently to clear up the issues this will cause. I believe that this front, which is best manned by mortals, is still a potentially fruitful one, with a massively chaotic outcome where the only question is how much chaos. And if not, I'd rather we didn't waste our better soldiers learning that."

"Very well. Your agents in... what was it called?"

"Palermo."

"Well, tell them to get to it."

**If the canon tried this, it'd get banned in America.**

**Please review.**


	66. An Unexpected Challenge

Ichigo was straining as hard as he could to get his blade out into the world around him, not letting up an inch, pushing as hard as he...

"You're doing it wrong." Ichigo opened his eyes, searching for the unfamiliar, hissing voice...

"AH!"

"What's the matter? I'm a _friendly_ snake."

The snake came closer...

"Get back!"

"Okay Zabimaru, that's enough!" Renji was trying not to laugh. And not failing too hard at it, either.

"Zabimaru?!" Ichigo finally saw the whole creature. "Oh, of course, your name means 'snake tail.' Ha, fucking ha."

"What you do is you try to be calm. You need to be completely relaxed to do it."

"I'll try that, then."

Keeping one eye on Zabimaru's tail, he tried to relax.

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Aizen smiled as he neared Seireitei. He would keep up the stealth as long as he wasn't sure he could fool everyone (about a mile into Seireitei) and then drop it.

The walls wouldn't be an obstable, they were built to register only unfamiliar reiatsu, and they probably wouldn't be updated to his death for about a month, given that Mayuri liked to wait for Seireitei to rack up a whole lot of deaths (and being a shinigami is not a safe job, so he didn't have to wait longer than that) and then update every single security measure to detect and exclude all of their reiatsu signatures.

He was still feeling triumphant when the walls slammed down anyway.

_**DAMN IT!**_

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo_Flashback_xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"What are you doing, Kurosaki-san?" Nemu was looking on, not looking particularly curious, but chances are she was, or else she wouldn't be asking, now would she?

"Updating the reiatsu detectors."

"Why are you doing that?"

"Because there are a whole lot of shinigami who have been listed as dead, who the security systems won't register as intruders."

"Is that important?"

"It could be."

"How?"

"I can't say."

"Then it isn't important."

"Probably not, but I want to be safe."

Nemu looked at him for a second.

"Is it that you _can not_ say, or _should not_ say?"

Ichigo hesitated for a few seconds.

"Never mind. You needn't say." _There's something wrong here..._

"Just tell me... is there something you know that I may need to soon?"

"You might."

"Can you tell me?"

"Need-to-know basis."

"Kurosaki-san, if you are tampering with my father's systems, and I am expected to give you permission, I _already need to know._"

"You said I needn't say."

They were silent for a few seconds.

"Okay... I've been forbidden to say."

"Do I or my father outrank the one who forbade you? Or are we equal in rank?"

Ichigo sighed. This was as good as a giveaway... "Neither."

"I see." She looked him in the eye. There was no sign of dishonesty. And since the king, the royal guard, and the soutaicho were now the only ones of whom _that_ was true...

"Then you should not say, and I do not hold this against you. Keep doing what you are doing."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo_Flashback END_xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

_**DAMN IT!**_

The south gatekeeper jumped down and took his post.

"All right, intruder! Get out here!"

He looked around, spotted Aizen, and instantly put two and two together.

He instantly bowed low. "I will open the gate for you, Aizen-taicho. Forgive me for my..."

_Ah, perfect. My hypnotism spell has turned him into a loyal moron. I need to rewrite that spell when I get a chance..._

_Well, the shit has hit the fan. I need to find a way to get the information I need from the mainframe, but using Gin might expose him, and I want to keep him in place as long as I can. Too bad he's the only man on my side high enough ranking to get the information I need. They'll have revoked my ability to access the plans for the ultimate weapon of terror, if the walls coming down means anything._

_I need some way to get my hands on the plans. There is no way to do that from out here, and little hope from in there._

_I guess there's no other way..._

"Thank you, Hikonyuto-san. I would like to enter."

They stepped through the gate together.

"You may as well drop it, Hikonyuto-san. There's nobody coming behind me."

"Hai."

He returned to the post and let his fingers slip, and gravity closed the door behind him.

_Kudakero, Kyoka Suigetsu._

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Alarms started going off in the 12th division HQ.

"NEMU! What **the **_**hell**_ have you done to the security measures!?"

"It was Kurosaki-san. He updated the security measures early, to exclude all of the shinigami who had died since the last update. He said that it could be important, but somebody higher-ranked than we had forbidden him to say why."

"And you're sure it was true?"

"Hai."

Whatever Mayuri said about his daughter (and however hard he liked to hit her) he had no doubt in her ability to catch liars. He had programmed that skill into her himself, based off of his own.

The only other conclusion to draw was that something terribly fucked up was going on.

And, even worse, it was something that Mayuri himself couldn't replicate.

_The head was completely destroyed... I **have **to learn how to do that!_

_Or maybe they're just fooling the security measures by faking a reiatsu signature that they thought was still okay by us? The combination of stealth and scientific skill that that would require is..._

His lesser subordinates all cringed away from the look that had come into his eyes...

_Either way, I **need that knowledge!**_

"Nemu! Kurosaki-san is currently researching a compound I devised recently, trying to make it kill faster. Get him over here. I need to report this to the soutaicho, and I think we might need to have him at the meeting to provide us with some much needed answers! There's no way we can fight this threat unless we have some idea what we are dealing with!"

**Please review.**


	67. The Crane, The Water, And Hachigen

"I have the right to know! My sensors picked up Aizen's presence! And why aren't Hitsugaya-taicho, Unohana-taicho, Madarame-taicho and Ichimaru-taicho here!? And as the representatives from the fifth and ninth..."

"Everyone who needs to know is here And yes, that does include you, Kurotsuchi-taicho. You probably should have known long ago, when this first came to my attention. Unohana-taicho is working on something related to this, and knows what is going on as well as you are about to."

All ten of the fourth's ten highest seated officers, Unohana-taicho included, were working their asses off with the kido corps trying to get the hypnotism spell off of the three gatekeepers.

Naturally, every damn one of them had already heard the explanation the soutaicho was about to give.

"I assume this is serious, given that you feel the need to keep some of our number in the dark?"

"All of Seireitei is in danger, and Rukongai. Even the mortal world. Everyone here is being trusted with a secret that could be the death of us all."

"I will do whatever I need to in order to protect innocents, soutaicho." The unseen expression on Komamura-taicho's face could only have been one of unshakable resolve.

"That is why you are here. This is not to be discussed with anyone outside this room, no matter their rank. That specifically includes Ichimaru-taicho, Hitsugaya-taicho, and Matsumoto-fukutaicho."

"Matsumoto-fukutaicho? Hitsugaya-taicho? My sister didn't implicate them..."

"I didn't think they were involved....?" Rukia was feeling kind of like she was losing credit...

"Matsumoto-fukutaicho and Hitsugaya-taicho are not involved, to the best of any of our knowledge. I am only afraid that Matsumoto-fukutaicho may warn Ichimaru-taicho, and that she may learn of it from Hitsugaya-taicho. Madarame-taicho is as likely as not to kill Ichimaru-taicho as soon as he hears, instead of waiting to catch him in an overt act, and force him to reveal everything he knows about the plot he is participating in."

"Then, Ichimaru-taicho?" _Son of a bitch..._

"That is correct, Ichimaru-taicho and Aizen taicho are both traitors." Given that it could no longer have any bearing on the fighting, Yamamoto-soutaicho had chosen to reward Komamura-taicho for his devoted service by refusing to allow him to learn that Tosen had been a traitor.

There was dead silence in the room for a few seconds. Those who had known couldn't think of anything to say to those who hadn't.

"Aizen-taicho?!"

"Yes, Komamura-taicho. Aizen-taicho. If it is any consolation to you, I was as surprised as you are."

"And, I assume that we are meeting because of his appearance on the scanners. You do not believe it to be an error?"

Mayuri's jaw moved to say something uncivil, but Yamamoto cut him off.

"No. I was excpecting something like this from my sources, and Kurotsuchi-taicho's work is the very best in Seireitei. If it sees a particular reiatsu signature, then that reiatsu signature is there."

"But how did he survive?"

"He disguised a false body using his zanpakuto. It's abilities allow for near flawless illusions. Don't bother saying its a flowing water type: he simply made it look that way."

Mayuri felt discouraged. Duplicating a zanpakuto wasn't all that easy...

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

**Late that night...**

**... or technically, 12:51, which isn't really night...**

Step step step...

The three Kasumiojji ninja jumped off of the roofs they were on, and landed on the roof next to the kind of plain, seemingly harmless warehouse.

Seemingly being the important word. Nothing having to do with spirits was as it seemed, unless it was a hollow.

The three glanced across the street. The four others were there, as they were supposed to be.

They let out a little reiatsu. The four others did as well, as did three more on the other side of the warehouse.

The two behind it on street level did as well.

The leader of the three let out one short burst, the signal to attack.

The bakudo master across the street jumped down, and pumped energy into the barrier. In about a minute, it was down.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo inside the warehouse xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"**RING THE ALARM! Terror alert, VICTORY! I stay droppin' that bombness, Rosie O'Donnel and Donald Trump stay arguin' about nonsense, they treat me as good as Hugh"**

Feeling the barrier weaken, Rose clicked off his stereo. He picked up his blade, and walked into the entrance hall to find Shinji and Lisa already there.

Kensei walked in seconds later. "Sora and Hachi are guarding the princess. So are her bodyguards."

"Everyone else?"

"Right here." Kensei stepped aside.

Zaraki, Yachiru, Hiyori, Masahiro, and Love all stepped through the door.

"Okay, let's get started."

As if on cue, the barrier's last layer finally snapped.

A number of ninja poured into the room...

... to find Kensei and Shinji staring at them through their masks, shrugging, and sheathing their blades.

The assassins, thinking that this was a serious, more than likely fatal mistake, rushed forward...

... only to drop on the ground catatonic as the two fixed them with a reiatsu enhanced glare fit to take down an army of men like them.

It was about at this point that they felt a bakudo-enhanced struggle going on downstairs.

"Kensei, go see how the princess is doing. Also, tell Hachi you're taking his place: we need him up here to restrain these guys, as soon as he's done with whatever snuck in behind us. We're going to see what they can tell us. I'm staying up here and making sure these guys are still down when he gets here."

When Kensei got there, he found two more assassins, both completely tied up by Hachi's binding spells.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo Flashback xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

The two assassins expected to do the job had snuck in through a back door (despite Kasumiojji's disdain for learning the geography of the mortal world, the assassins had not hesitated to go over the blueprints to the vizard warehouse with a fine-tooth comb) and gone to where the princess had seemed most likely to hide in the event of an attack from the front.

Which was also the most vulnerable place during an attack from the rear.

They had not found the princess or her bodyguards, who were hiding in a room closer to the supposed front-lines with reiatsu hiding barriers on it.

Instead, they had found Hachi and Sora, with their masks on.

Hachi immediately began casting a very powerful, very complex binding spell on the weaker assassin, who had stepped into the room first (poor guy.) The spell not only prevented him from attacking, but also protected his tongue (the idea being that a disciplined assassin might send his teeth into it rather than be interrogated, which Hachi knew the others would want to do. It also contained dormant spells which Hachi could use as necessary to cause pain without actually harming the subject physically.)

Seeing this, the senior assassin took his sword into his right hand, and raised his left wrist...

"Bakudo: Number One... Restrain!"

Hachi finished the weaker one, and then got to work on the already bound senior. (Who was already trying to bite through Sora's fingers so he could reach his tongue. Strong, not really. Dedicated, it seems so.)

He was about done by the time Kensei stepped in, escorting the princess.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo End Flashback xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Okay, do we have this machine ready?"

Rose and Love took one last look at the crane they had placed with its business end over the giant pool of water. "Hai."

"Okay everyone, lets get started."

They went into the next room. Hachi removed the spells keeping the prisoners asleep, while Shinjii pulled a switch releasing about a gallon of one Celsius degree, almost solid water onto each of them.

They all screamed, though the gag spells (which Hachi didn't really care to release until it was time for the prisoners to talk) muffled their cries. (Their masks were all gone to avoid having them get in the way, especially since they all seemed to have the power to strain oxygen out of water like a fish with its gills. That wouldn't help much with water torture...)

"Okay, now that you're all awake, I think it's time to start the torture. Now, as I'm sure you are all... what the hell are you doing?"

He noticed one of the ninja (who he recognized by reiatsu signature as the one who had brought down Hachi's barrier) straining as though preparing a very powerful kido spell.

He took a few steps forward, only to feel the power building _inside_ the prisoner's body.

"You do realize we were fully expecting a suicide kido, right?"

The answer came when he released the energy... into his own vitals, and which such huge force and weak control that the prisoners could all have died of it... had Hachi's spell not contained a provision to limit all kido use by the prisoners to well below what it would take to kill someone...

It still hurt though. Not only does a failed suicide attempt hurt like hell (especially when there's kido involved,) but the torture spells also kicked in to punish the prisoner for his "escape attempt".

And then the healing kido kicked in.

The torture spell didn't actually injure, it just hurt. But the suicide kido left injuries, and it would be better that the victim didn't get a chance to expand those injuries through another spell.

"That was our good friend Hachi's binding spell. It's not an original creation, but rather one that all kido officers in Seireitei above 5th seat are expected to be able to cast. It's basically every single bit of experience their torturers gained over the centuries."

He gestured to Hachi, who took the cue and ran with it. "They try to escape, so we bind them. They try to kick, so we bind tighter. They try to escape (or die) using kido, so we weaken their abilities. They try to use hidden bombs or blades, so we restrict movement even more. They come up with weapons to kill with as little movement as possible, so we monitor brain activity to restrict as much as possible. They try to bite their tongues or spit, so we put spells to restrict their mouth muscles, giving them only enough freedom to talk. If there is anything you can do that this spell wasn't designed to counter, you deserve to use it."

"Oh, and even if you do pull it off, I can bring back the dead."

_Damn it._

"Let's torture the bakudo expert first, shall we?"

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

Love, Kensei, Rose, Lisa and Sora stayed behind to watch the other torture victims (Sora asked for the job because he didn't want to see this next part) while the rest (minus Yachiru, who'd already gone back to bed) escorted the bakudo expert to the crane, tied him to the lifting/lowering part, and stood back.

They each grabbed a chair, and sat down, Hiyori nearest the controls.

She turned it backwards, so she was sitting with her legs spread and her head on the back of the chair, facing the victim. "So, you gonna spare us the effort, or what?"

Hachi gestured, and the ninja found his mouth more or less unbound. "Go fuck yourselves in hell with a bucket of dog shit!"

"Such hostile language... Saru-chan, if you would?"

Making a mental note to beat Shinji for that remark later, she lowered the ninja into the water.

As soon as he was too far under to get his head out to breathe, Hachi activated the torture spell, which made the victim feel like he'd had about twenty red-hot needles poked into each ball.

There was a pretty impressive show of bubbles from under the water. Figuring that he was about out of air, Hiyori pulled him back up.

And Shinji flew up next to him and gave him a punch to the gut to get the water out. (Hachi pulled his and Shinji's chair out of the way of the water. Goraishi had figured there'd be a lungful of water pouring out of the prisoner's mouth, and requested Zaraki sit out of its way. Masahiro just got soaked.)

After he was more or less done coughing, Shinji decided to try again.

Shinji stayed standing in midair with the information-source/pitiable-victim's head around navel level. "You ready to talk yet, asshole?"

"*cough*Go deepthroat *cough* a *cough* herpes-infected *cough* horse!"

"This is going to take a while."

**Please review.**


	68. Doubt Banished, Loyalty Regained

**Took me a while, huh?**

**Don't worry, the wait is over!**

Shinji looked over his notes. "So, to recap... main base of operations is in South 10, recruitment centers in South 58, South 80, and North 80, tried to make one in West 80, but an unfriendly yakuza kicked your ass out, kido academy in South 8?"

"Yeah."

"Any illegal weapons are from a secret site in Kasumiojji manor, you have no idea specifically where?"

"Hai."

"The leader is one Nukui Hanza, who takes orders directly from Kumoi?" This had taken a while to get out of him. Hell, it took a while to get him talking without avoiding the information and leaning towards inventive invective, but it was a real bitch to find out who the higher ups were.

"Okay, thanks for (eventually) cooperating. We might let you kill yourself later, since judging by the look on your face, you're itching to do so."

"Wow, thanks asshole. Actually, I'd rather kill you, but thanks."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"The main base of operations in in South 12? Interesting. Recruitment centers in South 58, South 80, North 80, nowhere else?"

"Hai. We tried to set one up in West 80, but that didn't work out. I'm guessing the last guy told you why?"

"Hai. Unfriendly yakuza."

"Got it in one."

"Okay, thanks. No real idea who the leader is, and you aren't entirely sure who in the family leadership you're working for, but you think we already got that out of the last guy?" It was a real pain in the ass having a prisoner guess what the other victims had already revealed. They might try sticking to that instead of revealing anything new. Nevertheless, Hachi wasn't picking up any signs of deception... except when he mentioned the HQ in South 12.

"Hai. I'd like to think it's Kumoi himself, but if I knew, I'd have told you by now. That's why the last guy tried to blast himself and us clear to hell, so you couldn't learn anything."

"And, if we catch you wielding illegal weapons?"

"I've seen them once or twice, the guy carrying them claimed they were made in Kasumiojji Manor. I didn't follow up on the lead. I don't like knowing much about my organization, because the more I know, the more assholes like you can get out of me." He tried to lick his lips clean of the water on them (which was dripping out of his respiratory tract) but the spell stopped him.

"Pretty smart." Shinji looked him in the eyes. "Now, where was that HQ again?"

The ninja tried to look away, but Shinji held his face so that he couldn't. "I forgot. Tell me again."

"South 12."

"He's lying."

The torture spell activated.

"South 12!"

"**You fucking liar!**"

"**South 12!**"

The second level activated, and the assassin could feel it in his kidneys. Shinji grasped his hair and looked him straight in his now panicked eyes.

"_**South fucking 12**_**!!"**

Shinji punched him in the stomach. Not full force, or it would have gone out his back, hollow mask or no, but it was still pretty painful.

"South... 12."

"Take off the torture spell. We're dunking him again, then turning it back on."

One underwater scream later... he started talking again, as soon as he was done coughing.

"South 10. But you already knew that, didn't you?"

"Doesn't mean we can put up with shit like that. All right, that's all we're getting out of you, let's start with the next asshole."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"The headquarters is in South 10, recruitment centers in South 58, South 80, North 80, East 80?"

"Hai?"

"You don't know of any illegal weapons used by your organization?"

"No. Have you heard of any?"

"Yes. Apparently, the victim you were supposed to assassinate was better informed than you. Any idea where they'd come from?"

"No."

Hachi gave him a hard look. Evidently, his brain pattern scan had turned something up with regards to that statement.

"You're hiding something..."

"I don't know anything!"

"Then you're holding back an educated guess!"

"How's that going to help you?!"

Shinji gave him a hard look. "Obviously, you think it will, or you wouldn't be hiding it."

...

...

...

"I have some idea where it _would _come from."

"Where's that?"

"Kasumiojji manor. The family was renowned as the best group of smiths you're ever going to meet. If we wield any illegal weapons, they probably come from the manor or one of the forges they own near it."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"The HQ is in South 10,and there are recruitment centers in... South 80, North 80?" Apparently it kind of varied who knew about which facilities.

"Hai."

"And do you know about any illegal weapons used by your organization?"

"No."

"You have any guesses about them that can help us?"

"No."

Hachi cut in with "My brain scan says that's a lie."

"Then it can go fuck itself."

The prisoner screamed as the torture spell kicked in. _**"Okay**_!"

The spell turned off. "Now, that guess?"

"I remember delivering a package from the manor to the South 10 facility. I was told _not_ to look inside it, or let anyone else except the person in the facility it was meant for, which almost certainly means 'illegal.' I didn't ask what was in it, in case something like this happened, but it was probably a weapon."

"Which you believe was forged, where?"

"Kasumiojji manor, or one of the nearby forges the family, or more accurately, Kumoi, controls."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

The tortures carried on about like that. The only thing they learned not already covered were that there was a recruitment center in North 79, and another in East 76.

Shinji looked over the info they had gained.

**HQ: Rukongai South 10**

**Kido Academy: South 8**

**Recruitment: South 58 and 80, East 76 and 80, North 79 and 80**

**Illegal Weapons: Forge in (maybe near) Kasumiojji manor, not clear where**

**Captives still in Karakura: We'll make arrangements to hand them over as soon as we can get in contact with whoever ends up doing something.**

"Well, we got some stuff, huh?"

"Not much we couldn't have learned from that binding spell expert, but still..."

"Well, guy like him, he was probably the most elite in the bunch."

"Yeah. All right, we need to find some way to get this to the proper authorities in Seireitei..."

"NO!"

The bodyguard ran up to them screaming.

"We can't tell the proper authorities! The families honor..."

"Well, we're already on thin ice with the proper authorities. I don't think mass murder in Rukongai will make them very happy with us..."

"Do it secretly! Like the way you retrieved Enryu..."

Hiyori snorted. "We weren't going up against the worst they had to offer back there. If we were, we might have had to use something unique to us, like a shikai or hollow mask. Or Rose's bankai, which would probably have been even harder to hide..."

"There has to be some alternative!"

Shinji rolled his eyes. "Well, what do you suggest?"

Kenryu stumbled for a second.

"Well, isn't there anyone else you can tell?"

"Nobody in a position to do anything. Unless you want them to rat instead of us."

"They can't get their hands on some ninja? Surely you have at least one friend with access to ninja."

"Not in the numbers we need, and we're on thin ice with them anyway." An image of Zankiri shaking hands with Kumoi while his ninja picked up swords in a secret armory appeared in all of the vizards' heads.

"Don't you know any high placed nobles?!"

Another image appeared in all of their heads.

"Yeah, but she doesn't have the authority to command them..."

"I knew it! Who are you thinking of?"

"Kuchiki Rukia."

Kenryu looked shocked for a second."**No! Her brother will involve the Gotei Thirteen!**"

"And that's looking more or less like our only option anyway. I really don't feel like fighting off any more ninja."

There was a long pause.

"Well... see if she can get any support without risking our future..."

Hiyori rolled her eyes. "**It's a little late for that! Your future is already risked!** The worst that can happen is that we are caught fighting for you in Rukongai (**yes**, that **will** be worse for your honor than bringing in the army,) after that is they manage to outsmart us and kill the princess (whereupon we bring her back), next to that is Kumoi being eliminated by the Gotei 13, who then return the power to the princess, and the best option I can see, which isn't likely, is what you want."

Kenryu spluttered, but Shinji cut him off.

"Like every option we have, it's a toss of the dice. The only difference is that if we go to the Kuchiki, they'll do one of three things: ignore us, contact the Gotei 13, or do what you want. If they do nothing, we can try something else. If they help, we get an okay conclusion to this whole affair. Particularly since their ninja are supposedly trained using methods you generally only see in the Shinigami forces."

Kenryu raised any eyebrow.

"It's a story that goes around the underworld. Apparently, a Kuchiki clan head taught the family ninja methods you generally only see in the Shinigami forces, using his knowledge as a Sixth division taicho. This is supposed to have happened before Byakuya's time, or his grandfather's."

"Is that legal?"

"It was judged to be. Not clear whether that was because of the law, the Kuchiki's money, or the Kuchiki's ninja. Probably one of the latter two."

"Damn. Worth a try then..."

"Right, I'll just get these notes into some form that makes sense..."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

**Later that morning: 10 AM**

Zankiri looked over the information that had been obtained.

And felt even more helpless than he ever had, worse than he had when he'd found out his position relative to the other nobles.

Oh, he was rich. His personal fortune was almost certainly more than what half of the noble families could muster in a pinch, probably more than the bottom fifty put together could. Compared to the bottom-of-the-piles, like the Izuru, he really had nothing to complain about. He was rich enough to afford a manor in Rukongai in addition to the usual manor in Seireitei.

No, it's just that... he had no real function.

Most nobles became shinigami, damn good ones in some cases. Nobody could remember the Kuchiki having any power outside the fact that they tended to make taicho more often than any other family, and because their ninja were very good at killing thieves, making sure to track them back to their stashes first. The Kuchiki had either not had a rival killed in living memory (remember, this is Seireitei, so don't go thinking 80 years,) or they were damn good at covering their tracks.

Shinigami posts were, in fact, the only reason the Izuru were still considered to be nobles at all. They tended to make seated officers in the 4th division rather often, and occasionally high-ranking ones. (The only Izuru to make above 5th seat in any division was now making more than the rest of his family put together.)

The other nobles had something else. The firework making (and, in Ganju-san and the late Kaien-san's case, hard partying) Shiba were fairly well liked during festivals (even if you didn't want them as neighbors during any other time of year.) Zankiri had only their connections to Urahara, and their own marketing assets, (including a sunglasses store that even shinigami had trouble saving up for,) to speak of.

Okay, maybe it's inappropriate to put an "only" before either of those assets, but they had no assets which could compare to the large ninja forces those noble families Zankiri was considered equal to had, or the sixth, seventh, or thirteenth division top-spot (which were all held by nobles, and which came with more money and prestige than most of his businesses even when business was good) or the weapon-making skills of the Kasumiojji.

Speaking of Kasumiojji...

The document in his hands was a list of the ninja bases they owned, and made references to...

To...

_These guys are making illegal weapons! What the **hell**! Why the **fuck** would he get my ass **mixed up in this ****shit****!? One wrong move, and those illegal weapons could end up pointed at me and my wife!**_

Running his eyes through the document again, he realized that he wasn't being asked to do anything to stop them, except...

... help get into contact with the Kuchiki...

... to get the Kuchiki ninja to attack, or maybe the Gotei 13...

_... I can fuck over the Kasumiojji without doing anything..._

_Or maybe I can fuck Urahara by handing this to Kumoi..._

_No! NO no no no no **NO! He's too valuable a business partner, besides which...**_

He started to laugh...

_**Urahara's rewarded me for my service! I fucking finally get to piss on the Kasumiojji! Ya ha!**_

He began the first belly laugh he'd allowed himself since he had been a child.

At first, his wife was angry to be woken up, but she soon found herself joining him.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

**12 Noon**

"This is the last warning you will receive. Get the hell out of our way."

Soifon immediately thought better of her order to the 3rd division door guard.

"Actually, just leave. Things are going to get chaotic around here, and you want to be somewhere else when they do."

"Chaotic?"

"Picture a burst of lightning tearing down a city block while a swarm of ninja chase a taicho."

*gulp*

"_That_ will happen?"

"Very possibly."

"Uh... _why_ is that very possible to happen?"

"I am not at liberty to say."

The foot soldier she was glaring at gulped.

"If you are going to chase my taicho, shouldn't I know why?"

Soifon-taicho decided to abandon reason.

The blade sheathed on her back disappeared, and a golden object grew on her hand.

She pulled her hand back, and her spiritual pressure became very obvious to the poor soldier, even though she purposefully held it back to avoid having Gin sense it.

"**Get the _motherfuck_ out of my way!"**

The foot soldier guarding the door to the 3rd division entrance wisely followed Soifon-taicho's advice, and the special forces began to pour into the building.

**Please review.**


	69. It Begins To End

**I think, if you were trying to find any system of organization in this fanfiction (word of warning, there isn't any) you'd have to begin the ending arc here.**

Ichimaru felt the reiatsu, and recognized it immediately.

It didn't take him any effort to figure out why she was trying to hide it from him.

_Fuuuuuuuuuuuck._

"Izuru-kun?"

"When you wake up, can you tell Matsumoto-chan I'm sorry, but there's someplace I have to be?"

Izuru stuttered for a second after that one.

"Wh-what?"

"You'll find out."

With that, Ichimaru slammed his fist into his loyal subordinate's stomach, knocking him out in one.

And his former superior lifted the illusion hiding himself.

"So, how do we get out?"

"Like this... _kudakero, Kyoka Suigetsu._"

The special forces poured into the room.

"Okay, so you turned us invisible and inaudible, right?"

Soifon gave an evil smirk. "Evidentially not."

Gin's smile slipped. "Whatthefuck? How can she see us?"

"Hado: Number Sixty Three... Twin Flames Twin Crash!"

The wall behind them was ripped off, and to shreds.

"Let's go!"

Aizen and Gin ran through the newly formed door, leaping from building to building, with all of the ninja always at least two roofs behind them.

Except Soifon, who was dangerously close...

"So, what did you do with your shikai, Aizen?"

Without warning, the aforementioned tripped his minion, and they both wound up lying on a rooftop...

while the ninja rushed past, chasing what could only be the illusions that Aizen had created.

"The illusions overlapped our real bodies, and now they're chasing..."

"We can't possibly have much time before something happens to compromise the goose-chase. We have to get to the information servers at the library before that happens."

"Right."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo About ten seconds of both of them all-out shunpo-sprinting later**_

"Okay, see if they've revoked your access rights yet."

A few clicking buttons later...

"No. What do you need?" _What a bunch of dumbasses. You'd think they'd have blocked my/his access __**before**__ the arrest attempt..._ Gin and Aizen both used mostly the exact same words in their heads.

"First, close the blast doors!"

"Hai."

Doors powerful enough to take just about anything a taicho could throw slammed shut behind them.

"Modsoul schematics, that new method to mass-produce gikongan, Mayuri's regular regenerative serum, the new stuff that brought back Byakuya, the skull symbol we use to take souls out of bodies, anything these guys have on kido mechanics, whatever they've got on cero, and everything they have on the Quincies."

"I already got the shit on the Quincies, and a race called the Bounts that has a reason to hate both them and the shinigami. It's in my pocket, same way it has been since I got it. I knew I was going to get exposed soon, so I kept it at all times."

"And they didn't suspect you?"

"They probably did. I'm almost sure they caught me looking into the Quincy file, but of course after having fought one, I could always say I just had my curiosity piqued."

"Excellent work. And the rest of what I asked?"

"Is ours soon."

After five minutes, the loading was complete. "Anything else?"

"That's everything I know we might need." (He'd already gotten the information on the Hogyoku and the Royal Key as part of Plan A.) "Take it out of there, and start another disk. If it gets interrupted while we're working, oh well."

Gin pulled the disk out of the computer, took an empty flash-drive-looking storage device from his left pocket, and started working.

"Mortal computer security and hacking techniques, anything they have on mortal weapons. Can you think of anything else?"

"Seireitei's passwords?" Gin was wondering why that wasn't already on the list.

"Pointless. They could change those the instant they realized we had them."

"Right." He started feeling like a moron. "Security records on Urahara and his pals, includin' Ichigo?"

"Most of it is dangerously out of date by now, and it will only get worse. Still, it can't be worse than what we personally know..."

"Okay." Gin added that to the list to be transferred. "Patrol squad routes and protocols?"

"That would be as pointless as downloading those passwords, and for the same reasons. I would recommend obtaining a list of members and their abilities, though that would grow out-of-date soon, too."

"Got it."

_**BANG**_

They both looked at the blast doors.

_**BANG **_(bang)**_ BANG_** (bang)

The small bangs (which seemed at about Soifon's level) weren't getting those doors down, ever, but the bigger bangs were seriously weakening the thing. The doors seemed to be built with self-repairing mechanisms, but not fast enough to get it fully repaired.

"How long do you think that door will last?"

The bangs stopped. Gin was thinking they'd given up. Aizen was thinking that they were thinking.

"Eject the device as soon as we're done with those documents. Even if there is enough time for us to get those downloaded, we won't get any more."

He hurried to the door, and touched one of the dented points, creating a triple layer mirror gate barrier on it.

He then muttered an incantation, under his breath, before his voice suddenly jumped to an audible volume.

"Bakudo: Number 81... Splitting Void!"

"Holding them back?"

"No, I was just making sure we don't get it in the same shot those doors do. (I hope.)"

Gin stopped smiling and opened his eyes. He looked at the doors.

"What?"

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"_**BANKAI, JAKUHO RAIKOBEN!**_"

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Aizen quickly opened the garganta in front of them, facing the door. This was the right move, as the attack effortlessly shattered the barriers, and, had it not ended up being fired into another dimension, would have fried them, and the computer. (Thanks to the barriers, it had lost the power to hit the wall behind them, and the building behind that, and the speed to kill Aizen before he could open the garganta.)

Seeing that the download was finished, Gin immediately ejected the thumb drive, and pocketed it.

"How's that escape plan coming?"

Aizen opened another garganta, this one facing them. He and Gin quickly escaped into it.

Gin looked to the side to see the portal that was already open, and Soifon's nasty looking lightning attack being lost into the void.

Aizen snapped his fingers, and both portals closed.

Unseen by them, or any the others who were still in the room, Ichigo covertly activated a "Heavenly Ricksaws" spell mark on his arm.

_Dad, it's me. They got away. Tell the others the war starts now._

_Got it. I'll tell the others. What do they have planned?_

_No idea yet, but they were almost caught in the library doing some last minute research. We should have a lead there._

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Ring...

Ishida Ryuken glanced at the caller id. It was Isshin.

Ring...

Click... Ishida put it on speaker, on the off chance that this was something important that he'd rather not repeat to his son.

"Hello?"

They both knew damn well Ishida had caller id, so Isshin didn't waste time with who he was. "Seireitei got something solid enough on Gin to arrest him, but he slipped away with Aizen."

"Crap. Do we know what they're planning?"

"They got found in a library, looking some stuff up as a last minute thing. Ichigo thinks they can guess from that."

"Understood."

"I'll tell Urahara, you tell the vizards."

"Understood."

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"That snake-tongued bastard got away **again!?**_**! AAAGGGGHGHHH!!!"**_ Kensei sounded a little put off, Saddam and his sons were slightly unpleasant, and Communists had minor disagreements with the Free World.

"Did those dickpipes at least pardon us yet? That'd be something..." (Evidentally the vizards were using speaker, too, because this was Shinji's voice.)

"Isshin didn't say. I assume that means it didn't happen."

Kensei didn't respond. Ryuken figured he didn't really feel like breaking telephone etiquette as grossly as expressing his feelings about this turn of events required.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"The criminal with the absolute hypnotism power was able to sneak his henchman out of Seireitei. There's a shock."

"There's more: he got into the library, and learned some last minute stuff."

"Like what?"

"Ichigo said he was going to look into that, hoping to get a vague idea what Aizen's going to do next."

"Smart kid. I can see someone becoming the youngest taicho in history..."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo**_

"Kuchiki-sama still isn't here."

"This is bullshit! You think you can blow off Zankiri-sama?" (They both knew damn well he wouldn't refer to Byakuya himself with that tone, or speak to his servant with it in his presence.)

"I _am_ sorry. I would offer to give him your message, but it seems from your attitude that this is important enough to merit immediate response, thus making it rather wasteful to send a messenger away before reading it."

"What the hell is he doing, anyway?! Even I know taicho get off at 2:30 sharp, so don't try to tell me he isn't going overtime!"

"It seems there's a rather massive rebellion in the works, including some high placed shinigami. He said that he can't tell me any more than that."

"Uh... okay... That trumps me... should I just leave it here?" The messenger looked rather embarrassed.

"If you feel that best."

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"Fuck, _fuck, __**fuck. FUCK!**_"

Not only had Aizen gotten away, he had classified information on him when he left.

"_**Damn it!!!!"**_ Soifon dropped to her knees in helpless rage.

Ichigo came up to her. Upon noticing him, she instantly began putting her mask back on.

A few seconds later, she looked him in the eyes. "Yes?"

"We've pulled security footage from the cameras in the library. You need to come to a meeting, now. We think we know what Aizen has planned, and it isn't good."

"Can you sum it up?"

"Mass produced modsouls."

**Please review.**


	70. Byakuya Grows His Wings

Ichigo walked into the room with Soifon in tow. The ranking officer in every division, whether taicho or fukutaicho, was already there, with her exception. (All the taicho also had their fukutaicho, including Soifon, who had found hers and brought him.)

Ichigo activated his "Heavenly Ricksaws" spell, which had, on his father's end, been modified to allow Shinji, Ryuken, and Urahara to listen as well.

Apparently Urahara had allowed Zankiri to listen as well.

"Everyone's here, that's good. All right, this is a list of everything they took. From as near as I can tell, he's trying to write 'How to Destroy The Mortal World For Dummies.'"

Nobody laughed.

"I assume that that was an expressive choice of words, and he's planning to use rather than package whatever knowledge he has?" One should never accuse Hitsugaya-taicho of having a sense of humor. "Could you be more specific about what he has?"

"The first two things he asked Gin to get were info on how to make modsouls, and that new gikongan mass-production tech. That he asked for that first may indicate how important it is to his plans."

"That monster is going to use modsouls? And Gin-kun's on _his_ side?" The expression of Matsumoto's face was something like if she'd been bitten by a fox she thought she'd tamed.

"Distressingly, yes. He also got our info on Mayuri's regenerative serums, including the stuff that saved Kuchiki-taicho. He's got the skull symbol, not sure what he's planning for that thing, outside of the obvious. He also looked up kido mechanics and cero, I think it's pretty clear what he wants to do with that. He also wanted info on the quincies, but Gin already had it, as well as an article on the Bounts, a race that hates both the quincies and the shinigami. I shudder to think what he has planned for those articles."

"Is that it?" Upon seeing the look on Ichigo's face, Matsumoto cursed herself for being such a fucking jinx.

"Not quite. At this point, Aizen requested that Gin begin a new disk, fearful that he might be interrupted before the download was done, and forced to leave his information. What follows is the information Aizen was willing to risk not receiving."

He sighed.

"Mortal hacking and computer security techniques, mortal weapons, security records on Urahara's allies, including me, and a list of the patrol squad's members and their abilities. He told Gin not to bother with patrol schedules or Seireitei's computer passwords, because he figured we'd just change those. The mortal tech lesson is what makes me believe that he will make at least a token effort to destroy the mortal world."

"The mortal world? Why would he attack that?"

"Almost certainly as a distraction, and a way to tie down useful soldiers." All eyes turned to Yamamoto at the sound of his voice. "If he were to attack the mortal world, he would certainly do so in the hopes of tying up our forces as we defended it."

"Should we allow it to fall, then?" Soifon joined in.

"**NO! We **_**cannot**_** allow that! **The modsoul army he would create in the process would be almost unstoppable! _**Even if we **__**know**__** he's leading us into a trap**_**, there is **_**no choice**_** but to **_**charge **__**straight into it!**__**"**_

"So, we're going to fight a war on two fronts... maybe we should destroy all the mortal graveyards?"

Soifon was the only one there capable of suggesting something like that, and, even though most of them saw the merit of her suggestion, nobody answered her.

"There is something else. There was information uncovered in this case that clears the names of several supposed criminals who have been hiding out in the mortal world, including one Urahara Kisuke, and his allies, who some of you saw at Karakura High."

This shocked the hell out of everyone who had been there, except of course for Ichigo and Byakuya.

"You're going to pardon the _vizards!?_" Hinamori looked shocked at the suggestion.

"It seems right, given what we have learned, and how useful they could potentially be." Soifon gave a contemplative look. "If we're going to welcome individuals with hollow powers into our midst, maybe we may as well follow through with my suggestion?"

Yamamoto gave her a stern look. "Soifon-taicho, you are hereby forbidden to go within two miles of any graveyard in the mortal world."

"Two miles? Yamamoto-soutaicho, isn't that going a little far?" (Matsumoto didn't have a strict side, so she couldn't see why anyone would have one like _that._)

"You didn't see her bankai, Matsumoto-san. Believe me, if she wants to destroy something, she can do it from just about anything less than those two miles off." Ichigo was still a little shaken about watching her knock down that door. Matsumoto had now fully graduated to blaming the modsoul for what happened, and so had gained _some _respect for Ichigo, more than enough to trust his word. (She still wanted to trash the modsoul herself, of course.)

"Yamamoto-soutaicho, I really must protest this! My suggestion may be the salvation of the mortal world!"

Yamamoto started to feel very, very old as he said this next part. "I am well aware of that. That is why I will not enter the fray myself, nor will Soifon-taicho: I will hold myself in reserve, ready to destroy any graveyard we are at risk of losing to Aizen with Ryujin Jakka. Soifon will be ready to do the same with Jakuho Raikoben. Of course, when the battle starts, I will have to lift my proclamation regarding those two miles of distance."

"And for now, I still may not, Yamamoto-soutaicho?"

"_I __**do not**__ want those graveyards destroyed_ unless there is _**clearly**__ no other acceptable option_, Soifon-taicho."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

It was seven at night when Byakuya finally got home, and about that time when he learned about Kasumiojji's treason.

He realized instantly this wasn't the sort of thing trivial enough to wait for morning.

"Damn it."

He turned to a servant. "Excuse me, could you go through our senkaimon? There is something I need from the mortal world."

"Hai, Kuchiki-sama? What do you need?"

"There are 588 members of my division, that's 98 times six, so I think I need 98 six-packs of some disgusting mortal concoction called 'Red Bull.'"

He paused. "Although, to be safe, maybe I should get them two each. Make it 196."

"... I know I shouldn't be questioning my orders, Kuchiki-sama, but..."

"I discovered a treasonous plot which demands immediate attention, and which will probably take my division all night to exterminate."

"Ah. Although in that case, perhaps you should get assistance from another division?"

"Who would be insane enough to have their division stay up all night at another taicho's..."

Byakuya saw no reason to finish the sentence.

The servant didn't either. "And if I can't find enough?"

"Red Bull, Monster, Rockstar, they're all interchangeable."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

"Okay, the main HQ for the ninja is in South 10. I think no matter what I suggest, the top three officers in the Eleventh will end up there..."

Madarame, Tadakatsu, and Ayasegawa all nodded affirmative.

"However, the forges will be in the Kasumiojji Rukongai manor, or in that area. I would like at least one of you to end up there instead, if at all possible."

Tadakatsu looked at the others, then shrugged. He'd rather be at the real fighting center, but this was the next best thing, and his power could do much more good at this site, then if he was staying a couple dozen yards behind his taicho to stay out of Ryumon Houzukimaru's way. "I volunteer."

"Very good. I think it would be best for Abarai-fukutaicho and the rest of the top half of the sixth division's seated officers to accompany me to the kido academy, so, that leaves everyone else for everywhere else."

The eleventh officers nodded their heads.

"So, how much Red Bull will we need for your men?"

Madarame and Ayasegawa both shrugged.

"The closest even division by six is 86. If we wanted to be safe, it'd be 172. We have three extra members who don't divide evenly into six, so 173 six-packs, and no-leftovers."

"I'll send another servant."

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

Now, there's something you have to understand about the eleventh division. They don't like gathering at another taicho's request.

So, when it turned out that they were being asked to help another division with something, they were rather put off.

"Go to hell, you aristocrat bastard!" The shouted words were rather slurred, as one would expect from anyone with the balls to disrespect a Kuchiki.

Upon feeling a burst of reiastu from Kuchiki-taicho, the moron who had spoken (who the eleventh brass noted for future reference to be their twentieth seat) sat down and tried not to piss himself, while his liver shifted into overdrive.

"Thank you. Now, this is going to be a difficult mission, but I think our combined forces can handle it, especially with a little investment I made before coming here..."

"We don't want to hear about your money, shit-for-brains!"

_Drunken, peasant jackass._

None of the eleventh brass remembered his face. That probably meant he was rather unimportant, not even seated. (This was particularly likely, as Tadakatsu was in the habit of memorizing the names and faces of all the seated officers in the Gotei 13.)

Renji recognized him from his time in the division, but couldn't put a name to his face...

Anyway, he shut his mouth under circumstances similar to the last idiot's.

"Thank you. And now, if you would?"

A couple of nameless sixth division grunts started hauling in a couple of carts covered with...

The eleventh division grunts were somewhat placated upon seeing those. Most of them used it on a regular basis as a training aid.

"Thank you. I bought enough for two each, including the seated officers. This will be an all night operation, so..."

There was some angry grumbling.

"If it helps, I do not expect any sleep tonight either."

The grunts all started to wonder just how bad the situation could be, for a high-ranking aristocrat to go without sleep.

"Thank you. If you do not feel you will need yours, I would recommend you carry it anyway, in case you need it, or you see another who does. And one final word of warning..."

"I've tasted this... swill once. It is vile. Yet, in this case, it is a necessary evil. And to prove that I am not asking anything unreasonable of you..."

Byakuya reached into a crate, and took out two. The top three eleventh officers and Abarai all followed his lead.

Byakuya unhesitatingly drank a quarter of his... concoction with dignity, and did not grimace as he did so. This might have inspired his men, were it not for the fact that Renji and Madarame chugged theirs with no effort (and less dignity), they didn't grimace either, and after they emptied their cans, they crushed them against their foreheads like drunk college jocks.

Renji pocketed his second can for later, and addressed his and Madarame's men.

"Tastes like liquid crap, but you can't beat the rush!"

**Please review.**


	71. Intertwining Paths

There were only two warriors attacking the HQ.

The ninja found this amusing.

Which, in turn, amused Madarame-taicho.

His best friend was behind him, sizing up the competition.

"We probably should have brought some foot soldiers."

Madarame shrugged. "Probably."

They both started laughing as they released their shikai (Ryumon would have taken all the fun out of it) and began fighting.

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

About twenty foot soldiers from each participating division were with Tadakatsu as he walked into the Kasumiojji clan compound.

"Hello, how may I help you gentlemen?"

"If you'd seen me drinking with my friends, no way would you call me that. Anyway, I need you to lead us to Kumoi. Now. He's been caught with his hands in a cookie jar."

_Oh crap. If he's corrupt enough that the army is willing to track him out of the official clan residence in Seireitei and into this one... This is going to be a PR shitfest... _"What kind of cookie jar?"

"The kind with poisonous fangs."

"Oh, okay. Anything else?"

"Yeah, if there's a forge on site, I think you should have someone escort... about half of the foot soldiers in here to it." He turned to the men gathered. "Even mix of divisions for each operation!"

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"So, why is this place so important?" Abarai was looking at the compound they (or really, Byakuya) had just taken. From the look of it, it was just a small scale teaching facility.

"For one thing, it is where their men learn their kido. The families secret spells, which may have developed along a different lines from ours, and may even be more advanced, may be stored here, or the place where they are stored may be referenced here."

"And you want to increase your families power with them?" Abarai hadn't thought of Kuchiki-taicho as a politician before. Not really. He'd been a soldier, a friend's brother, an aristocrat, but somehow, not a politician.

"That is part of it. I would also like to learn them myself, as an intellectual exercise. The kido corps and Gotei 13 might also have use for them." He coughed slightly. "Of course, any forbidden techniques will be handed over as evidence, not for use."

"That all the people who are getting this stuff, Kuchiki-taicho?"

"Actually, Zankiri-dono also mentioned a grey market buyer."

To use a crude, but descriptive metaphor, that comment started set off some alarm bells in Renji's skull. "Grey... market?"

_**xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox**_

**flashback**

"Um, Shinji? If it isn't too much trouble... do you remember how they knocked down my barrier?"

Shinji's face took on a look that suggested he knew where this was going, and was glad to hear all this. "Oh, yeah... isn't that supposed to be impossible?"

"Hai. Do you think you could ask for some extra attention to be paid to getting any reading material they have on kido at that academy?"

Shinji smiled. "Knowing Urahara and Zankiri, they're both going to want some money for seeing that you get that material..."

"Well, lucky for me that I had a private bank account that's been gathering interest, and which technically operates outside of the law, so Seireitei can't shut it down..."

"You might have to empty it..." The look on Shinji's face said quite clearly that he didn't so much like this part.

"That's fine. You, Love, and Rose have been paying for everything out of your similar arrangements anyway."

**end flashback**

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"Ah, here we are."

"What do have, taicho?" Abarai reached for the scroll in the hidden compartment.

"_Don't touch it_, there's an intertwining paths spell on it."

"Intertwining paths?" Renji started to look scared. "You mean...?"

"Yes. Tell everyone to clear the building. I'm almost sure I can disarm it with minimal property damage, but if there are shinigami in the way..."

"What about you?! You just came back..."

"And don't feel like risking my life foolishly. But I'm sure I can handle this."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." The tone of voice left no room for doubt.

"Okay."

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"Okay, they're all accounted for..."

"Thank you."

He walked back in...

And five minutes later, there was a sound of an explosion.

A minute later, he walked out, carrying his prize.

"Is that the scroll?"

"Hai. As I suspected, there was a spell on it, designed not only to prevent it from being touched but to, in the event of an intruder finding and releasing the barrier improperly, destroy this scroll as well as all of the other scrolls in the building."

"But, how did you realize there was a destruction path spell on it?"

"I realized almost as soon as I saw how unsophisticated the hiding place was that this one was meant to be found first, and when I thought about it, it wasn't hard to guess why."

"So, there are other scrolls. Did they make it?"

"Hai. Once it became clear that I had to redirect an explosion, it wasn't that hard to find out where they were directing most of the force, and direct all of it away from those points. This way, we need to carry them out."

"Hai." Abarai-fukutaicho followed his superior, struggling to bite down the question that was haunting him.

_You're going to leave anything forbidden alone, right? You won't use or sell it?_

He fought it down, and walked down into the academy with his division-mates.

**Please review.**


	72. The Operation Continues

**I felt like I should warn you guys that I'm going back to school tomorrow, and that's going to eat all of my creativity, as was covered in a previous author's note. Expect another chapter sometime around Christmas.**

**You know those things where you write a short piece on why you aren't going to be writing, and you don't put any story into them, just say why the readers aren't getting any soon? I was going to put one, but well... they suck monkey cock.**

**It's okay if there's no alternative, and if you can't find time to write for whatever reason and won't be able to soon, it is considerate to leave one, but... they still suck monkey cock.**

**And that's why I wrote this chapter today.**

Yumichika and Madarame stood on the remains of the structure that, up till tonight, had been a ninja fortress.

There was only one ninja alive. Not because he was that strong, but because he was perceptive enough to figure out what was about to happen, and get the hell out of its way.

What had happened was, the two of them got bored as the ranks had thinned out.

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**flashback**

"I'm on eighty-three of these weakasses. You?" Madarame's grin had started to falter after he realized that most of the fun was over.

"I lost count after fifty-six. Probably killed about twenty since then, but I'm not sure. By the way, that ugly concoction is starting to wear off, or maybe I'm just burning through by going through exertions that mortals aren't capable of. Either way, I'd rather not put myself through that again unless I have to."

"That mean you want me to end this?"

Yumichika jumped backwards out of a window, and shouted "Go ahead!" from a safe distance.

"Got it! **Bankai, Ryumon Houzukimaru!**"

**flashback end**

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Hanza eyed his two opponents. "You two are from the Gotei 13?" _He had a white jacket with the symbol of the Eleventh Division on it, but it vanished when he yelled 'bankai'. And while that was happening, his sword grew to twice his size. Crap. I'm dead._

"Hai. Does that mean you surrender?"

"No." He raised his katana (wishing he'd had a bakkotu on him) and jumped at them.

Yumichika swung his shikai at the ninja, who blocked with his own blade.

"Get out of the way, dude!"

"This guy matches the description we got for the ninja leader! We should try to take him alive!"

Ryumon shrank out of existence as Houzukimaru's shikai reappeared. _God-damn technicalities... fuck!!!!_

He jumped forward to help his friend with a fight that he just knew wasn't going to be any fun.

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It only took one trip to move all of the scrolls to the sixth division HQ.

"The night shift guards should be able to handle anything that happens. Who here thinks they can handle another operation?"

Nobody had drunk their second energy drink, and they were all feeling optimistic.

"All right then. The recruitment centers shouldn't be too well protected, and the headquarters already has Madarame-taicho there..."

"I'm going to the headquarters. The rest of you go to back up Tadakatsu-fukutaicho. If they don't need it, help with the recruitment centers."

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Hanza smiled as he saw that his opponents had broken a sweat.

Five minutes of fighting his hardest was tiring, but he wasn't getting caught alive, damn it!

He was maybe as strong as a fukutaicho without using bakkotu. He'd never tried bakkotu before, so he didn't really know what kind of new worlds of power he could gain using them.

He was trying to keep fighting, but he was starting to get tired. So were they, but not as bad.

They weren't even straining themselves too much keeping up with him. They were about five or ten times as strong and fast as he was. His advantages were few.

Actually, they were two.

One: they couldn't kill him. They needed him alive.

Two: he didn't really feel like going down without dying.

Bakkotu or not, Hanza was willing to take really strong hits and keep moving.

He'd already taken fifteen hits that should have instantly knocked him out, and ten that should have maimed a limb beyond use, only to force himself to stay conscious and keep using the limb.

Unfortunately, his left achilles tendon was cut, and his mobility wasn't exactly good without that... no matter what kind of force he used, that leg wasn't moving.

And then he felt another presence behind him.

_Well, fuck this, then..._

He put the blade to his throat, only to have the presence grab his wrist from behind, preventing him from doing something so emo it makes Ulqiorra look normal. (Not to say he would have caught the reference, but hey...)

"_Fucking law-and-order goon..."_

**SLAM**

Hanza began to drop.

As a last act before losing consciousness entirely, he tried to aim his falling form for the business end of his blade, but the presence knocked him away from it.

His sight dimmed, and he lost all his senses.

Apparently.

"Nice one, Kuchiki-taicho!"

_Why did the last thing I heard before I passed out have to be that bastard with the white haori?_

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"Welcome. Are you here because of Kumoi-san?"

Renji's face took on a dark look. "You know what's he's been doing?"

The doorman instantly realized he'd said something that hadn't really made a good impression."Not until tonight! I didn't find out until Tadakatsu-san told me!"

Renji looked relieved. "Where is he?"

"Kumoi-san, or Tadakatsu-san?"

Before Renji could answer, the man corrected himself. "Actually, Tadakatsu-san is holding Kumoi-san in the main hall. For that matter, he also gathered all of the forbidden weapons there."

"Ah. Where's that?"

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"How are you holding up?"

"Pretty good. I thought you were attacking the kido academy?"

"We took care of it. Taicho went to help your new taicho, and sent us here. He said if you don't need the help,we should go help take out the recruitment centers."

"Well, we got this."

Renji turned around. "All right, you heard him, we have to..."

And then he felt a presence he'd once thought he never would again.

"Abarai-kun."

When he heard Aizen's voice, he knew there was only once chance left.

He drew his sword, and it extended without the command phrase. But not the way it usually did.

It began to glow as it took the form of a giant skeletal snake. As he turned, Renji sent the tip plunging downwards towards Aizen.

**Please review.**


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